Ever feel like your partner might be more into themselves than they are into you?

For instance, they turn every conversation into a one-person show, starring them! You mention a great movie you just watched, and before you know it, you’re deep into a discussion about their taste in films. Your preferences? Well, they’re still waiting at the starting line.

If you’ve found yourself in this situation, you could be dealing with a self-centered person.

Don’t fret, this article is here to help. We’ll look at 10 signs that show you’re in a relationship with someone who’s a bit too focused on themselves.

1) They always put their needs first

Ever notice that your partner’s needs always seem to come before yours? Maybe they’re always the one choosing the restaurant, or perhaps they never seem to consider your schedule when making plans.

This can be a clear sign that you’re dealing with someone who is self-centered. Relationships are about balance and considering the needs of both parties. If it’s all about them and their needs, you might need to have a talk about this imbalance.

2) You’re always apologizing

Do you find yourself saying “sorry” a lot, even when you’re not sure what you’re apologizing for? When your partner consistently shifts blame onto you and avoids taking responsibility for their actions, it could be indicative of self-centeredness.

In a balanced, healthy relationship, both partners should be able to admit when they’re wrong and apologize. It’s not just one person’s job to keep the peace.

3) They hardly know anything about you

I remember once, I was with someone for quite some time and I noticed they didn’t know some basic things about me. Like, my favorite color, my middle name, or the fact that I can’t stand raw onions. It felt strange because I knew so much about them.

A partner who seems clueless about details that matter to you is obviously not as into you as they should. A thriving relationship is where both partners show a keen curiosity about each other’s preferences, aversions, and delightful idiosyncrasies.

4) They don’t listen

Did you know that active listening is one of the key indicators of empathy? That’s right! People who genuinely care about others tend to listen more than they speak.

If your partner interrupts you frequently, dismisses your feelings, or easily forgets what you’ve told them, it might be because they’re too wrapped up in their own world. Remember, communication is a two-way street and in any successful relationship, both partners need to feel heard and understood.

5) They rarely show empathy

Empathy is the emotional glue that fosters connection and understanding in a relationship. In the absence of it, partners may struggle to comprehend or acknowledge the emotions of each other.

This lack of emotional attunement can manifest as a failure to provide comfort during challenging times, an inability to celebrate the joys of the other person genuinely, or a general disregard for their feelings. 

Over time, this imbalance can erode the foundation of the relationship. The more empathetic partner will end up feeling neglected and emotionally isolated, while the self-centered partner may remain oblivious to the impact of their actions on the overall health of the connection.

6) They always want to be the center of attention

I once had an experience with someone whose conversational style resembled a one-person show. Be it a casual chat or a lively gathering, every topic inevitably morphed into a monologue starring them. It was as if they spent every waking minute seeking to feed on applause and compliments. 

Trust me: It’s super exhausting being in a relationship with a thunder stealer. 

A healthy relationship thrives on partnership, where both parties have the space to sparkle. When one partner consistently dominates the narrative, it can leave the other feeling sidelined. 

7) They belittle your achievements

Isn’t it just the worst when you’re excited about something you’ve achieved, and the person who is supposed to be your biggest cheerleader just shrugs it off? Or worse, they compare it to something ‘bigger’ they’ve done. It’s like they’re saying your accomplishments don’t matter.

If your partner struggles to genuinely celebrate your successes and instead diminishes or redirects the spotlight onto themselves, it’s a red flag for potential self-centeredness. Everyone deserves a cheerleader in their corner, someone who values and acknowledges their achievements, no matter the scale. 

Being with someone who appreciates your accomplishments contributes to a positive and supportive dynamic. A self-centered partner may undermine your achievements, leaving you feeling unacknowledged and undervalued. 

8) They never compromise

If your partner consistently avoids meeting you halfway and consistently insists on having things their way, it may indicate a self-centered approach to the relationship. Love and companionship thrive on a balanced give-and-take dynamic, where both individuals contribute to decisions, compromises, and shared experiences.

A self-centered partner tends to prioritize their own preferences and desires without considering the needs or wishes of their significant other. This one-sided approach can create a sense of imbalance and frustration, as the relationship becomes more about catering to the whims of one person rather than mutual cooperation.

9) They don’t respect your boundaries

Think of boundaries as the unsaid rules that define your personal space, emotional comfort zones, and your right to be you.

Now, when your partner starts casually ignoring these lines, it suggests a self-centered focus, where their desires and needs take precedence without consideration for your comfort. 

If you feel upset for doing what others expect and it bothers you, it might mean they crossed your personal boundaries, advises Bryana Kappadakunnel, a licensed marriage and family therapist in Los Angeles.

You might not have given much thought to recognizing signs that your personal boundaries are being crossed, but you’ve likely felt a noticeable discomfort or unease whenever that specific person is around. It’s important to realize that these feelings might go beyond just a passing discomfort – they could be pointing to a breach of your boundaries within the relationship. 

10) They don’t make an effort to be part of your world

It’s tough when you’re with someone who shows zero interest in being part of your world. Maybe they never want to hang out with your friends, or they show no interest in getting to know your family.

If your partner is more interested in pulling you into their universe instead of stepping into yours, it could be a sign they are self-centered. In a balanced relationship, both partners should make an effort to engage with each other’s worlds, because it’s not just about “me”, it’s about “us”.

Honest communication is the key

In conclusion, navigating a relationship with someone deeply self-centered can be emotionally taxing and challenging. The subtle yet pervasive signs, from constant blame-shifting to a lack of empathy, paint a vivid picture of a dynamic where the spotlight rarely strays from the self. Recognizing these indicators is the first step toward fostering a healthier relationship. 

If you consistently find yourself feeling uneasy or sensing that something isn’t quite right, it’s worth taking a closer look to see if your boundaries are being compromised. This opens up the opportunity for honest communication and adjustments in the relationship to ensure both parties feel respected and comfortable.