If you don’t want your partner to feel neglected, say goodbye to these 8 habits

Avatar by Justin Brown | March 14, 2024, 10:51 am

It’s an unfortunate truth that even the most loving relationships can be marred by neglectful habits. These habits can creep in subtly, often unnoticed until the damage is done.

Neglect isn’t always about what we’re not doing – it can also be about what we are doing. Certain behaviors, however unintentional, can create a feeling of being undervalued or overlooked in our partners.

To foster a relationship of mutual respect, empathy, and cooperation, we need to identify and say goodbye to these habits.

Here are eight such habits that might be making your partner feel neglected.

1) Lack of active listening

We’ve all been there – you’re trying to communicate something important, and the person you’re speaking to seems more interested in their phone or what’s on the television. It’s incredibly disheartening and can lead to feelings of insignificance.

When we don’t give our full attention or brush off our partner’s words, we unintentionally convey that their feelings don’t matter to us.

Over time, this can lead to feelings of neglect and chip away at the trust in our relationship.

Breaking this cycle takes conscious effort and practice.

Active listening goes beyond just hearing your partner’s words; it’s about truly connecting and engaging with them. It means recognizing their thoughts and emotions, asking questions to clarify, and responding with empathy.  

2) Being too absorbed in work or personal interests

We all have our passions and interests, and it’s only natural to want to dedicate time to them.

But when these pursuits begin to take up all our time and energy, leaving little for our partner, it can lead to feelings of neglect.

I’ve learned this firsthand. As someone passionate about fostering creativity and personal growth, I can easily become engrossed in my work.

However, I’ve realized the importance of maintaining a healthy balance between my personal pursuits and my relationship.

Neglecting your partner for work or hobbies sends the message that they’re less important than these other aspects of your life. It’s crucial to create a balance and ensure that your partner knows they are a priority.

So how do you do that? Start by setting boundaries around work hours, or scheduling regular ‘together’ time. It’s not about giving up what you love; it’s about making room for the person you love in your life.

3) Ignoring or minimizing your partner’s feelings

One of the most hurtful things we can do in a relationship is ignoring or minimizing our partner’s feelings.

When we dismiss their emotions or experiences, we’re essentially telling them that their feelings aren’t valid or important. This can leave them feeling neglected and undervalued.

It’s crucial to respect and validate your partner’s emotions, even if you don’t fully understand them.

When they share something with you, show empathy and understanding. Recognize their emotions as real and important, and respond in a caring, supportive way.

This is a topic I’ve explored in depth in my video on the importance of giving up the idea of constantly being a “good person.”

In this video, I share that striving to always be a “good person” can lead to internal criticism, judgement of others, and makes us easily manipulated.

Letting go of this ideal fosters a more authentic, fulfilling life – one where we can truly embrace and understand the feelings of those around us.

If you found this helpful and want to explore living a life with more purpose and freedom along with 20,000 others, consider joining me on YouTube by clicking here.

YouTube video

4) Forgetting to express gratitude

In the hustle and bustle of daily life, it’s easy to take our partners for granted. Over time, this lack of appreciation can make them feel neglected and unimportant.

Expressing gratitude is about acknowledging the value our partner brings to our life. 

Whether it’s verbalizing appreciation with a simple “thank you,” engaging in acts of kindness like surprise notes or thoughtful gifts, spending quality time together, showing physical affection, or easing their burdens through acts of service, each expression serves to convey your deep appreciation for their presence in your life.

Recognizing their efforts, backing their pursuits, and maintaining a strong connection isn’t just about strengthening your bond—it’s about creating a vibe of gratitude that adds richness to your relationship every single day.

5) Failing to spend quality time together

In a world where we’re constantly connected digitally, it’s easy to forget the value of genuine, face-to-face interaction. We may be in the same room as our partner, but if we’re engrossed in our phones or laptops, are we really present?

When we fail to spend quality time with our partner, we’re essentially neglecting the relationship. This doesn’t just mean being physically present, but also emotionally and mentally engaged.

Quality time is about giving your undivided attention to your partner. It’s about participating in activities together, having meaningful conversations, and truly connecting on a deeper level.

This helps to build a stronger bond and fosters a sense of belonging and intimacy.

So, make it a priority to spend quality time with your partner. Set aside specific times to be fully present with them – no distractions, just genuine connection.

It might be challenging at first, but over time it will become a natural part of your relationship. And trust me, it’s worth it.

6) Always avoiding conflict

When we consistently avoid disagreements or uncomfortable conversations, we’re essentially saying that our comfort is more important than addressing issues that affect our partner. This can make them feel unheard or insignificant.

Conflict, when handled appropriately, is a crucial part of any healthy relationship. It provides an opportunity for growth and learning, allowing us both to better understand each other’s perspectives and come up with solutions that consider both parties’ needs and feelings.

Yes, conflict can be uncomfortable, but it’s also a chance for us to deepen our understanding of our partner.

By courageously addressing conflict when it arises instead of avoiding it, we can ensure our partner feels seen, heard, and most importantly, not neglected.

7) Not recognizing their growth and changes

As humans, we’re constantly evolving and growing. Our interests, values, and perspectives can shift over time.

If we fail to recognize and appreciate these changes in our partner, they may feel neglected.

In acknowledging your partner’s growth, you’re showing that you see them as they are in the present, not just as they were when you first met. This can strengthen your bond and deepen your connection.

Therefore, take the time to not only notice but also appreciate the ways your partner is growing and changing. Celebrate their achievements, encourage their pursuits, and let them know you’re proud of who they are becoming.

8) Neglecting self-care

It might seem strange, but neglecting our own self-care can lead to our partners feeling neglected.

When we don’t take care of ourselves – physically, mentally, emotionally – we aren’t able to show up fully for our partners.

Self-care is about more than just bubble baths and spa days. It’s about taking care of our health, setting boundaries, engaging in activities that fulfill us, and doing the inner work necessary for personal growth.

When we prioritize self-care, we’re better equipped to be present and supportive in our relationships.

Moreover, taking care of ourselves shows our partner that we value our own well-being, which can motivate them to do the same.

The power of authentic connection

In any partnership, the feeling of neglect can subtly creep in, eroding the foundation of mutual respect and understanding.

However, by being mindful of these eight habits and making a conscious effort to change them, we can make our partners feel valued and cherished.

Remember, it’s not just about avoiding these habits; it’s about actively embracing their opposites.

Listen actively, balance work and personal life, respect your partner’s feelings, express gratitude often, spend quality time together, acknowledge their growth, and prioritize self-care.

Through these actions, we can build relationships where both partners feel seen, heard, and appreciated. This is the essence of an authentic connection – a bond that nurtures growth, fosters resilience, and brings shared joy.

If you found this article insightful and want to explore more about living with authenticity and purpose, I invite you to join me on my YouTube channel. Click here to subscribe and join a community striving for a life of freedom and authenticity.