People who always seem relaxed tend to avoid these 9 things

Graeme Richards by Graeme Richards | December 30, 2023, 1:35 pm

We all know that one person who always seems to be in zen mode, right? They’re usually calm, cool, and collected, no matter what’s going on around them.

I’ve always been fascinated by these types of people. What’s their secret? How do they maintain that level of tranquility amidst the chaos?

After a bit of digging, I’ve discovered they tend to avoid doing certain things. These are habits or activities that most of us engage in without a second thought, but that can actually contribute to stress and anxiety.

In this article, I’ll share the 9 things people who always seem relaxed tend to steer clear of. And who knows, maybe by avoiding these things, we can all find our own zen mode.

1) Overthinking

Ever noticed how the most relaxed people seem to have a knack for letting things go? They don’t dwell on what went wrong yesterday or stress about what might go wrong tomorrow.

This isn’t because they don’t care. It’s because they’ve mastered the art of not overthinking. They know that over-analyzing every situation or decision often leads to unnecessary stress and anxiety.

Overthinking is a trap many of us fall into. We replay conversations in our minds, worry about the future, and question our past decisions. All this does is drain our mental energy and fill us with unnecessary worry.

So if you want to be more like those relaxed individuals, start by letting go of your tendency to overthink. Acknowledge the situation for what it is, make a decision, and then move on. It won’t be easy at first, but with practice, you’ll find it becomes second nature.

2) Negativity

The power of positivity is something I’ve come to understand better over the years. I used to be quite a negative person, always focusing on what could go wrong rather than seeing the potential in situations.

One day, I noticed a friend of mine who always seemed so relaxed, even when things were going wrong. I asked him about it and he said, “I don’t let negativity rent space in my mind.”

That phrase stuck with me. I realized that by constantly focusing on the negative, I was creating unnecessary stress for myself.

So, I made a conscious effort to shift my mindset. I started looking for the positive in every situation, no matter how small. It wasn’t an overnight change, but gradually, I noticed a difference.

I started to feel more relaxed and less anxious all the time. And now, I can honestly say that avoiding negativity has become one of my go-to strategies for maintaining a calm and relaxed state of mind.

3) Multitasking

Contrary to popular belief, our brains are not designed to handle multiple tasks at once. In fact, research shows that multitasking can reduce productivity by as much as 40%.

Those who always seem relaxed understand this. They avoid the trap of multitasking and instead focus on one task at a time. This approach not only leads to better results, but it also reduces stress levels and improves overall wellbeing.

So the next time you’re tempted to juggle multiple tasks at once, remember that it’s more efficient (and relaxing) to tackle one thing at a time.

4) Lack of self-care

Those calm, relaxed individuals we admire? They make self-care a priority. They understand that in order to maintain a relaxed state of mind, they need to take care of their physical health as well as their mental health.

This means eating a balanced diet, getting regular exercise, ensuring they get enough sleep, and taking time out for relaxation and hobbies.

Ignoring self-care can lead to a host of problems, not least of which is increased stress and anxiety. So if you aspire to be one of those seemingly always relaxed people, start by taking better care of yourself. It’s not selfish; it’s essential.

5) Procrastination

It’s easy to think that relaxed people are just naturally laid back, but often, they’ve made a conscious decision to avoid procrastination. Leaving tasks until the last minute can cause unnecessary stress and panic, which is far from relaxing.

Those who remain cool under pressure tend to tackle tasks head-on, breaking them down into manageable chunks and dealing with them well in advance of any deadlines.

So, if you’re prone to putting things off until the last minute, try adopting a more proactive approach. You’ll be surprised at the sense of calm it can bring.

6) Holding grudges

We’ve all been hurt or disappointed by others. It’s a part of life. But those who remain perpetually relaxed have mastered the art of forgiveness.

Holding onto grudges and resentment is like carrying a heavy weight. It burdens your heart and clouds your mind, leaving little room for peace and relaxation.

Letting go doesn’t mean forgetting what happened or allowing others to hurt you again. It’s about freeing yourself from the hold that negative experience has over you.

So, if you’re holding onto any grudges, consider letting them go. It might just be the key to finding that inner calm you’ve been seeking.

7) Perfectionism

I used to be a perfectionist, always striving for the absolute best in everything I did. I thought it was a strength, but it turned out to be a major source of stress.

The truth is, perfection is an illusion. Striving for it can lead to anxiety, dissatisfaction, and burnout.

I’ve learned to embrace the beauty of imperfection and accept that ‘good enough’ can indeed be enough. This shift in mentality has brought a newfound sense of calm and relaxation into my life.

If you find yourself constantly seeking perfection, try embracing imperfection instead. You’ll be amazed at how liberating it can be.

8) Constant connectivity

In our digital age, it’s easy to get caught up in the constant cycle of emails, notifications, and social media updates. But all this connectivity can lead to a sense of overwhelm and stress.

People who always seem relaxed tend to set boundaries with technology. They allocate specific times for checking emails or social media and spend the rest of their time being present in the real world.

Disconnecting from the digital world from time to time can help reduce stress levels and promote relaxation. So, consider setting some tech boundaries for yourself. You might just find it’s a game changer for your mental peace.

9) Ignoring feelings

One of the most important habits of people who always seem relaxed is their ability to acknowledge and process their feelings. They understand that ignoring or suppressing emotions only leads to stress and anxiety in the long run.

Instead, they allow themselves to feel their emotions, understand them, and then let them go. This emotional awareness and acceptance is key to maintaining a relaxed and peaceful state of mind.

Remember, it’s okay to feel what you’re feeling. Acknowledge it, understand it, and let it pass. It’s a simple yet powerful practice for achieving inner calm.

Final thoughts: It’s a practice

The journey towards being perpetually relaxed doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a practice, a daily commitment to avoiding these stress-inducing habits and cultivating a more mindful and present approach to life.

It’s about recognizing that stress and anxiety often stem from the things we do, or don’t do, in our daily lives. And that by making small but consistent changes, we can cultivate a state of calm and relaxation.

Remember, life is not about racing through to the end, but about slowing down and enjoying the journey. Being relaxed isn’t a destination; it’s a way of traveling through life.

So as you go about your day, consider how these habits might be impacting your peace of mind. And remember, every step you take towards avoiding these stress-inducing habits is a step towards a calmer, more relaxed you.