Hi, I’m Lachlan Brown, and I’ve always been fascinated by what makes us tick—the little quirks, habits, and choices that shape who we are.

Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about one behavior in particular: how we interact with social media.

Or in my case, how we don’t.

Here’s the thing—I rarely post.

Not because I don’t enjoy social media, but because it’s just not my instinct.

And that got me wondering: Does this habit say something about me?

About others like me?

Is there a deeper connection between how we behave online and who we are offline?

The more I looked into it, the more patterns I noticed.

Turns out, people who rarely post on social media often share certain traits and behaviors, backed by psychology.

If you’re someone who prefers to stay in the background online or you’re just curious about what this says about others, you might find these insights as eye-opening as I did. 

1) You value privacy

As someone who rarely posts on social media, I’ve often asked myself why.

The first behavior psychology pointed me towards was a strong sense of privacy.

People who are less active on social media tend to value their personal space more.

It’s not about being secretive, it’s more about cherishing your private experiences and not feeling the need to broadcast them to the world.

This inclination towards privacy can be a double-edged sword.

On one hand, it could mean that you’re more focused on living in the moment rather than documenting it.

On the other hand, it could also mean that you’re missing out on the benefits of shared experiences and community building that social media can provide.

But at the end of the day, it’s about balance.

The key is to understand your own comfort zone with privacy and use social media in a way that enhances your life rather than detracting from it.

If you’re like me and you lean towards keeping things private, don’t worry.

There’s no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ way to use social media – it’s all about what works best for you.

2) You prefer genuine connections

The second behavior I noticed was a strong preference for deeper, genuine connections, something that social media often struggles to provide.

I remember a time when I went on a trip with close friends.

We were having an amazing time exploring and making memories.

Yet, I noticed some of them were more focused on capturing the perfect photo for social media rather than fully experiencing the moment.

It made me realize that I valued the authenticity of the experience more than the potential likes and comments on a post.

I preferred the deep conversations, the shared laughter, and the quiet moments of connection that seemed to get lost in the search for social media validation.

This behavior aligns with Carl Rogers, one of the most influential psychologists who said, “In my early professional years, I was asking the question: How can I treat, or cure, or change this person? Now I would phrase the question in this way: How can I provide a relationship which this person may use for his own personal growth?”

Just like Rogers suggested, I believe in fostering relationships that promote personal growth and genuine connection. 

3) You’re less likely to compare yourself to others

I used to scroll through my Facebook feed and see all the amazing things that people were doing.

Fancy vacations, perfect relationships, impressive jobs – it all seemed to be there on my screen.

And I found myself comparing my life to theirs, questioning why I wasn’t doing as well as they were.

But when I stopped posting and significantly reduced my time on social media, I noticed a shift.

I realized that these posts were just highlights of people’s lives, not their whole reality.

Research indicates that reducing social media usage can decrease feelings of envy and improve overall well-being.

Without the constant barrage of “perfect” lives on my feed, I found myself happier with my own life.

I was able to appreciate what I have, instead of constantly comparing myself to others.

The truth is, everyone has their struggles and challenges, even if they’re not posting them on Instagram.

By limiting my social media usage, I’ve been able to focus more on my own journey and less on how it stacks up against others’.

4) You tend to be more productive

I remember when I used to spend countless hours scrolling through social media feeds, posting updates, and responding to comments.

It was easy to lose track of time and before I knew it, hours had passed.

When I stopped posting and reduced my social media usage, I suddenly found myself with a lot more free time.

Time that I could use to focus on my work, my hobbies, and my relationships.

And it turns out, there’s a scientific basis for this.

A study conducted by the University of Pennsylvania found that reducing social media usage can lead to significant decreases in loneliness and depression.

Not only that, but participants in the study also reported improved productivity.

The study stated: “Using less social media than you normally would leads to significant decreases in both loneliness and depression.”

(Source: Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology, vol. 37, no. 10, 2018, pp. 751–768.)

So if you’re someone who rarely posts on social media like me, you might find yourself being more productive and feeling less lonely and depressed.

And that’s definitely something worth celebrating!

5) You’re not reliant on external validation

The fifth behavior common to those who rarely post on social media is a lower reliance on external validation.

In the past, I used to find myself constantly checking for likes, comments, and shares on my posts.

Each notification was a little rush of validation, a sign that people approved of what I was sharing.

But when I stopped posting regularly, I realized that my self-worth wasn’t defined by these digital affirmations.

I started finding validation from within and from real-life interactions rather than from the virtual world.

It was liberating to break away from the cycle of constantly seeking approval on social media.

Suddenly, I was doing things because I wanted to, not because they would generate likes or comments.

6) You have a strong sense of self-identity

Back when I was an avid social media user, I found myself subtly influenced by the opinions and lifestyles of those I followed.

Whether it was fashion, food, or even political viewpoints, I was mirroring what was trending on my feed.

A study published in Current Psychology highlights that adolescents often engage in impression management on social media, curating online personas that may not reflect their true selves.

When I stepped back from posting and significantly reduced my social media usage, I had the space to reflect on who I truly was, separate from the influence of others.

This reminds me of a quote from the renowned psychologist Erik Erikson who famously said, “In the social jungle of human existence, there is no feeling of being alive without a sense of identity.”

This couldn’t be more true.

Discovering your own identity apart from social media trends and opinions can be liberating and deeply fulfilling.

7) You may actually be more social

Here’s a counterintuitive behavior: those who post less on social media may actually be more social in real life.

I remember when I used to be glued to my phone at social gatherings, more focused on posting about the event than actually participating in it.

When I stopped posting, I found myself actively engaging with people around me.

I was having more meaningful conversations and truly enjoying the company of others.

This might seem surprising because we often equate social media usage with being social.

But sometimes, less screen time can lead to more face-to-face interactions.

The famous psychologist Albert Bandura once said, “In order to succeed, people need a sense of self-efficacy, to struggle together with resilience to meet the inevitable obstacles and inequities of life.”

True social interactions give us a sense of belonging and help us build resilience in a way that online interactions often can’t.

So here’s a practical tip: next time you’re at a social event, try leaving your phone in your pocket.

Engage with the people around you and enjoy the experience.

You might find yourself feeling more connected and fulfilled.

Conclusion

So there you have it: seven behaviors you might display if you rarely post on social media.

Remember, this isn’t about demonizing social media or glorifying those who use it less.

Social media has its benefits, but like everything else, it’s about balance.

If you’ve recognized yourself in some of these behaviors, that’s fantastic!

You’re likely living a life that’s true to who you are.

If not, don’t worry.

It’s never too late to reassess your relationship with social media.

Try taking a small step today.

Maybe spend a little less time scrolling, a little more time engaging in real-life conversations.

You might be surprised at how fulfilling it can be.

After all, our lives are made up of the connections we make and the experiences we have – let’s make sure they’re ones that truly matter.