There’s a subtle distinction between being ‘fancy’ and being ‘classy’. It’s not about the price tag on your clothes or the brand of your car.

Being classy, according to psychology, is about your behavior, your actions, and, most importantly, how you treat others.

And let me tell you, a truly classy person isn’t hard to spot. They stand out through their actions and behaviors.

In this article, we’re going to delve into the ten qualities that psychologists say truly define a classy person.

Let’s get started. 

1) Empathy

When it comes to distinguishing marks of a truly classy person, empathy tops the chart.

Psychologists have found that empathy – the ability to understand and share the feelings of others – is a key trait of people who are considered classy. It’s a quality that’s not about social standing or wealth, but about genuine human connection.

A classy person doesn’t just sympathize; they empathize. They don’t just hear; they listen. They put themselves in other people’s shoes and respond with kindness and understanding.

Empathy sets them apart. It’s an indicator of emotional intelligence, and it’s what gives their class a deeper meaning.

This quality is more than just being nice. It’s about truly understanding and respecting the feelings and experiences of others. And that’s what makes it so crucial in defining a classy individual.

The lesson here? If you want to be classy, start by being empathic. But remember: genuine empathy can’t be faked.

2) Respect

The second quality that psychologists associate with a truly classy person is respect.

To me, respect goes beyond simply treating someone politely. It’s about acknowledging their worth and dignity as a person. It’s a fundamental value that should be shown to everyone, regardless of their status or background.

I remember a situation where I attended a high-profile event with a friend who is well-known in his field. During the event, he introduced me to a number of influential individuals. What struck me about him was the way he treated everyone – from the waitstaff to the event’s hosts – with the same level of respect and consideration.

He listened attentively, responded thoughtfully, and always showed appreciation for their contribution, no matter how small or seemingly insignificant. That’s when I realized that being classy isn’t about how you treat those who can do something for you, but how you treat those who can do nothing for you.

It was an enlightening experience and a powerful lesson in respect – a true mark of class.

3) Authenticity

While there’s no universal definition of class, psychologists have found one trait that consistently stands out – authenticity.

Being classy doesn’t mean conforming to societal norms or standards. It’s about being true to oneself, maintaining personal integrity, and not being afraid to stand by your values, even when they go against the grain.

This makes authenticity a highly valued trait in social interactions. Being true to oneself is not just a mark of self-respect, but also a sign of respect for others. A truly classy person values authenticity in themselves and appreciates it in others.

4) Graciousness

Another quality that sets a truly classy person apart? Graciousness.

Graciousness is about more than just being polite. It’s about showing kindness, even in difficult situations. It’s about being patient, understanding, and forgiving, even when under pressure.

A gracious person doesn’t take offense easily. Instead, they choose to respond with kindness and understanding. They don’t hold grudges or seek revenge.

Instead, they choose to let go and move forward with positivity and grace. This quality of graciousness shows a high level of emotional maturity and class.

A truly classy person knows that being gracious not only makes them more likable and respected, but it also contributes to their overall sense of peace and happiness.

5) Good manners

While this may seem like an obvious point, good manners are a quality that should never be underestimated in a truly classy individual.

Good manners are about more than just saying “please” and “thank you”. They’re about being considerate of others, respecting personal boundaries, and showing kindness in our everyday interactions.

A classy person understands that good manners aren’t old-fashioned or outdated. Instead, they’re a timeless form of respect and consideration for others. Whether it’s waiting your turn, not interrupting when someone else is speaking, or showing gratitude for a kind gesture – these are all indicative of good manners.

In a world where rudeness often gets more attention, the quiet strength of good manners is a mark of true class.

6) Generosity

Generosity, in its many forms, is a defining quality of a truly classy person. But don’t be mistaken – it’s not about how much money you give away or how big your donations are.

Generosity is about the spirit with which you give. It’s about giving your time, your attention, your knowledge, and your resources without expecting anything in return. It’s about being generous with your praise, your respect, and your kindness.

Classy individuals understand that generosity is a way of life. They know that the smallest act of kindness can have the biggest impact. And they understand that generosity is not just about helping others; it’s also about enriching their own lives.

The ability to give selflessly, to lift others up, to share what we have… these are the acts of generosity that truly define class. Because at the end of the day, class is about how you make others feel about themselves.

7) Humility

Humility is a trait that’s often overlooked, yet it’s a cornerstone of true class. A classy person is comfortable with who they are, without feeling the need to boast or seek validation.

I remember a time when I achieved something I was really proud of. I wanted to shout it from the rooftops and make sure everyone knew about my accomplishment. But then, I remembered a piece of advice my grandfather once gave me: “Let your work speak for itself.”

I realized then that the truly classy way to handle achievement is with grace and humility. It’s not about belittling your accomplishments, but about acknowledging them without arrogance or pride.

Humility allows us to keep our achievements in perspective and remain grounded. It reminds us that while we should be proud of our successes, we are no better or worse than anyone else. It’s a quality that speaks volumes about our character and class.

8) Acceptance of flaws

An unexpected trait of a truly classy person? The acceptance of their own flaws.

We often think that being classy means being perfect. But the truth is, nobody’s perfect. We all have our flaws and shortcomings. However, it’s how we handle them that defines our class.

A classy person doesn’t try to hide their flaws or pretend they don’t exist. Instead, they acknowledge them, they learn from them, and they strive to improve upon them.

They understand that flaws are not something to be ashamed of but are part of what makes us human. They know that true class comes from accepting ourselves as we are and embracing our imperfections as opportunities for growth and self-improvement.

9) Being non-judgmental

Being non-judgmental is a quality that’s deeply ingrained in a classy individual.

They understand that everyone has their own journey and their own battles to fight. They don’t hastily form opinions or make assumptions about others based on superficial observations.

Instead, they keep an open mind. They listen, understand, and empathize before forming any opinions. And even then, they’re reluctant to judge because they recognize that there’s always more to a person than meets the eye.

A classy person treats everyone with respect and kindness, regardless of their background, appearance, or lifestyle choices. They believe that every person has value and deserves to be treated with dignity.

In a world quick to judge, being non-judgmental is a mark of true class.

10) Consistency

The most important quality, the cornerstone of a truly classy person? Consistency.

Class isn’t a one-time thing. It’s not about behaving well at a fancy event or treating someone kindly when you need a favor. It’s about consistently treating people with respect, kindness, and fairness, regardless of the situation or the individuals involved.

Being classy means being your best self, all the time. It’s about maintaining these qualities of empathy, respect, authenticity, graciousness, good manners, generosity, humility, acceptance of flaws and being non-judgmental consistently.

True class is not situational. It’s a way of life. It’s the mark of a person who understands that every interaction is an opportunity to treat others with kindness and respect. And that is what being truly classy means.