I used to think growing up was automatic. Like, one day you’d just wake up, and poof—you’re mature.

But then I realized some habits and behaviors stick around longer than we’d like, and they quietly signal, “Hey, maybe there’s some growing left to do.”

I’m not pointing fingers—I’ve been there too, probably more often than I care to admit.

So, here’s a look at some of the common behaviors that might mean you haven’t fully stepped into your most mature self yet. And no shame in it, because awareness is where real growth starts.

1) Engaging in constant drama

Life is full of ups and downs, but for some women, life seems to be a never-ending rollercoaster of drama.

Drama can be addictive. It can bring a sense of excitement and unpredictability that some people find appealing.

However, a constant need for drama might indicate a lack of maturity. In fact, science backs this up. According to psychologists, high conflict individuals tend to be emotionally immature.

Mature women understand that life isn’t an episode of a reality TV show. They know that real relationships require stability and calmness, not constant upheaval.

So if you find yourself constantly embroiled in drama, it might be worth considering whether this is a sign of your own emotional immaturity.

2) Shying away from responsibility

I’m sure we’ve all experienced this at one point or another. There was a time in my life when I found myself constantly avoiding responsibility, and it was a sign that I had some growing up to do.

I would always find an excuse to avoid doing things that required commitment or accountability.

Whether it was passing off work tasks to others or blaming external factors for my own shortcomings, I was in a constant state of denial.

Looking back, I can see that my refusal to take responsibility was a clear sign of my immaturity. In fact, psychologists highlight avoiding responsibility and major commitments as key indicators of immaturity.

Mature women understand that life comes with responsibilities, and they are ready to face them head-on.

Avoiding responsibility might seem like the easy way out, but in the long run, it only stunts your personal growth.

3) Over-reliance on others

One of the hallmarks of maturity is self-reliance. While it’s perfectly normal to lean on others when times get tough, an over-reliance on others could be a sign of remaining stuck in a childlike state.

Being able to take care of one’s own needs is a clear sign of adulthood.

Those who never truly mature often find themselves excessively dependent on others, expecting them to solve their problems or fulfill their needs.

This behavior can strain relationships and hinder personal growth. Becoming more independent doesn’t mean you have to do everything by yourself.

It just means taking ownership of your life and making decisions that reflect your own desires and values, rather than relying on others to do it for you.

4) Difficulty with compromise

Compromise is a fundamental aspect of any relationship, whether it be personal or professional.

It allows you to find common ground and respect each other’s perspectives, even when they differ from our own.

Women who struggle with maturity often find it hard to compromise. They insist on having things their own way, and struggle to understand why others may not agree with them.

This inability to compromise not only causes conflicts but also hinders personal growth.

Being mature means acknowledging that we don’t always have all the answers and that other people’s points of view are just as valid as our own.

Learning to compromise is a step towards maturity. It helps us to build stronger relationships and fosters mutual respect.

So if you find that you’re always insisting on getting your way, it might be time to reassess your approach.

5) Focusing on external validation

We all like to be liked. It’s a natural human desire. However, women who haven’t quite matured often excessively seek validation from others instead of finding it within themselves.

They may constantly seek approval or base their self-worth on the opinions of others.

This reliance on external validation can lead to a lack of self-esteem and an inability to make decisions without seeking approval first.

Mature women understand the importance of self-validation. They know their worth isn’t determined by how others perceive them, but by how they perceive themselves.

If you find yourself constantly seeking validation from others, it might be a sign that you need to focus more on developing your self-confidence and finding your own sense of self-worth.

6) Struggling with empathy

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. It’s what enables us to connect with people on a deeper level and build meaningful relationships.

However, women who haven’t fully matured often struggle with empathy. They find it difficult to put themselves in someone else’s shoes and understand their perspective.

This can lead to misunderstandings and conflicts, and can make it hard for them to maintain healthy relationships.

It’s heartbreaking, really. Because they may not even realize how this lack of empathy is affecting their relationships and the way people perceive them.

Mature women understand the importance of empathy. They know that to truly understand someone, they need to listen, show compassion, and sometimes put their own feelings aside.

So if you’re finding it hard to empathize with others, it might be a sign that you have some growing up to do.

But don’t worry, empathy is a skill that can be learned and developed over time. 

7) Resisting change

Change can be frightening. I remember a time when I would do anything to maintain the status quo, fearing that any change would disrupt my life and bring about negative consequences.

This resistance to change is common among women who have yet to fully mature. They prefer to stay in their comfort zones, even when it’s detrimental to their growth.

Mature women, on the other hand, understand that change is a natural part of life. They embrace it, knowing that it’s often through change that we learn, grow, and become better versions of ourselves.

So if you find yourself resisting change, it might be a sign that you have some growing up to do.

8) Being overly materialistic

We live in a world that often values material possessions. Yet, an excessive focus on material things can be a sign of immaturity.

Women who are overly materialistic often measure their worth and success by the things they own.

They may constantly compare themselves to others based on material possessions, leading to feelings of inadequacy and discontent.

Mature women understand that true value and happiness can’t be measured by material wealth.

They focus more on personal growth, relationships, and experiences rather than the latest fashion trends or luxury items.

So if you find yourself overly concerned with material possessions, it might be a sign of immaturity.

The truth is, it’s the intangible things in life – like love, friendship, and personal growth – that truly enrich our lives.

9) Lack of self-awareness

If there’s one thing that stands between immaturity and maturity, it’s self-awareness.

Women who haven’t fully matured often lack self-awareness. They may not recognize their own behaviors and how they affect others.

This lack of awareness can lead to misunderstandings, conflicts, and a failure to grow.

Mature women understand the importance of self-awareness. They constantly reflect on their actions, emotions, and behaviors, striving to understand themselves better and improve.

Final thoughts: Grow at your own pace

Maturity isn’t something you hit like a milestone—it’s more like a slow burn.

We all have these moments, little flashes where we realize, “Oh, I’m still growing.” And that’s the point.

Not to feel behind or like you’re stuck, but to recognize where you are right now. I’ve had plenty of times where I resisted change, clung to validation, or avoided responsibility.

What I’ve learned is, none of that defines you. It’s what you do next that counts. So, take each moment as a chance to grow—on your own terms, at your own pace.