We all know that one woman who seems to excel in her career but never seems to mention her personal life.

Maybe she’s always the last one in the office, or her calendar is packed with meetings but never with social plans.

These subtle behaviors might seem like dedication to her job, but they can also be a sign of imbalance.

High-performing women often find themselves caught between societal expectations and personal goals, leading to habits that reflect the pressure of “doing it all”—without much time for themselves.

In this article, we’ll delve a bit deeper into these behaviors. Let’s dive in:

1) They find it hard to switch off

Ever notice that some people seem to have an invisible tether that keeps them connected to their work, even when they’re off the clock?

For women who have great careers but not-so-great personal lives, this is often the case.

They find it hard to switch off from work mode – mentally, emotionally, and sometimes even physically.

You might find them checking emails at dinner, thinking about a project while watching a movie, or discussing work during a family outing.

It’s not that they don’t care about their personal life.

It’s just that work tends to occupy a larger portion of their thoughts and their time.

This constant connection to work can leave little room for nurturing personal relationships, hobbies, or simply unwinding.

And while it might seem like they’re being super productive, this behavior can actually lead to burnout in the long run.

2) They tend to prioritize work over personal commitments

A few years back, I had a friend called Jane – a high-flying corporate lawyer.

She was brilliant at her job and her career graph was nothing short of impressive.

But here’s the thing:

When it came to personal commitments, Jane often found herself putting work first.

Birthdays, anniversaries, friend’s get-togethers – there were always urgent meetings or last-minute work calls that took precedence.

At first, it seemed like a one-time thing. But over time, it became a pattern.

Jane would always put work commitments above personal ones.

And although she genuinely cared for her friends and family, this behavior ended up creating distance in her personal relationships.

Now, the point here isn’t to criticize Jane or anyone who relates to her behavior.

Having a strong work ethic is commendable.

But when it starts to constantly overshadow your personal life, it might be time to take a step back and reassess your priorities.

3) They struggle to say ‘No’

‘No.’

Such a small word, yet so difficult to say for some of us, especially in a professional setting.

This hit me hard while working on a project with a colleague who was always ready to take on more responsibilities.

Let’s call her Lisa.

Lisa was a go-getter, always ready to step up, always willing to take on extra tasks.

But there was a problem.

Lisa’s inability to say ‘no’ at work meant longer hours, less downtime, and virtually no ‘me’ time.

It left her feeling drained and left little energy to invest in her personal life.

This affected her relationships and her mental health.

I remember one time when Lisa was asked to work on a weekend – the same weekend she had planned a road trip with friends she hadn’t seen in months.

She couldn’t say ‘no’ to the work request and ended up missing out on reconnecting with her friends.

The lesson here is that saying ‘No’ is not about being difficult or uncooperative.

It’s about setting boundaries between your work and personal life.

It’s about making sure you have enough energy and time for both aspects of your life.

Because at the end of the day, all work and no play can make even the most driven individuals feel dull and unfulfilled.

4) They often underestimate the importance of personal time

Work is important, that’s a given.

But so is personal time.

I’ve noticed that women who are highly career-driven sometimes underestimate the value of personal time.

They might see it as unproductive or even wasteful, especially when there are deadlines to meet or goals to achieve.

But here’s what they might not realize:

Personal time isn’t just about relaxation or leisure.

It’s about self-care and mental rejuvenation.

It’s about nurturing relationships and pursuing passions outside work. It’s about life beyond the office.

Take it from me, a woman who once thought that working late nights and skipping lunches were the keys to success.

It took a toll on my health, my relationships, and my overall happiness.

I learned the hard way that personal time is not a luxury, but a necessity.

It’s crucial for maintaining a healthy work-life balance and overall well-being.

So, if you find yourself constantly putting off that yoga class for a meeting or skipping dinner with loved ones to finish a report, remember this:

Personal time is important.

And it’s okay to prioritize it.

5) They struggle with perfectionism

If there’s one thing I’ve noticed about women who excel in their careers but struggle with their personal lives, it’s that they often have a tendency towards perfectionism.

In a work setting, this drive for perfection can lead to exceptional results.

They’re the ones dotting the ‘i’s and crossing the ‘t’s, making sure every detail is just right.

But did you know that psychologists have found a strong link between perfectionism and burnout?

That’s right.

While striving for perfection might yield results at work, it can also lead to stress, anxiety, and exhaustion.

And when you’re constantly running on empty, your personal life is bound to take a hit.

I’ve seen it happen with colleagues who are always striving for that perfect presentation, that flawless report.

They pour all their energy into work, leaving little left for their personal lives.

It’s important to remember that while striving for excellence is a great trait, being too hard on oneself can be counterproductive.

It’s okay to be less than perfect. It’s okay to make mistakes and learn from them.

After all, we’re human, not machines.

6) They sometimes struggle with guilt

Ever felt a pang of guilt for leaving work early or taking a day off? If so, you’re not alone.

Many women who are focused on their careers often grapple with feelings of guilt when they take time for their personal lives.

They may feel like they’re letting their team down or falling behind in their work.

I’ve been there myself.

It took me a long time to shake off that nagging feeling whenever I decided to put my personal life first. But over time, I realized something important.

Work is a part of life, not the other way around.

It’s perfectly normal—and necessary—to take time out for yourself and your loved ones.

After all, we work to live, not live to work.

So, if you’re feeling guilty about prioritizing your personal life every now and then, remember this: It’s not just okay to put yourself first sometimes—it’s essential.

You’re doing the best you can, and that’s more than enough.

7) They often neglect their own needs

When you’re caught up in the rush of a demanding career, it’s easy to forget about taking care of yourself.

I’ve seen it happen too often – women who are so focused on their careers that they end up neglecting their own needs.

They skip meals, skimp on sleep, or ignore signs of stress and burnout.

This isn’t just bad for your health; it can also impact your personal life.

After all, it’s difficult to nurture relationships or pursue hobbies when you’re running on empty.

At the core, self-care isn’t about self-indulgence; it’s about self-preservation.

It’s about ensuring that you’re in the best possible shape – physically, mentally, and emotionally – to handle the demands of both your work and personal life.

So, take care of yourself. Your career is important, but so are you.

Final thoughts

If you see yourself in these behaviors, it’s okay – we’re all works in progress.

The first step towards change is awareness. Recognizing and acknowledging these behaviors is a huge step forward.

It’s not about blaming yourself, it’s about realizing that there might be room for improvement.

Start with small steps.

Try saying ‘no’ to that extra task that might eat into your personal time.

Make a conscious effort to switch off from work mode when you’re with loved ones.

Prioritize self-care. 

Be kind to yourself as you navigate this path. Celebrate each step forward, no matter how small.