Women who don’t genuinely value themselves usually display these 7 behaviors (without realizing it)

Tina Fey by Tina Fey | December 22, 2024, 7:36 pm

It’s common for women who don’t truly value themselves to display certain patterns of behavior, often without even realizing it.

I’ve witnessed this repeatedly. These behaviors are quite typical and tend to work behind the scenes, quietly chipping away at self-esteem.

In this article, we’ll delve into these 7 behaviors, aiming to shine a light on these unconscious patterns. By recognizing them, one can start the journey toward self-love and genuine self-appreciation.

So, let’s dig in and examine these telltale signs up close.

1) Self-deprecation

One of the most common indicators of undervalued self-worth is a tendency towards self-deprecation.

Women who don’t genuinely value themselves often resort to downplaying their own achievements or abilities. This behavior is not just about being humble; it goes a notch further into undermining their own worth.

It’s like a reflex—an automatic response to any form of praise or recognition. Instead of graciously accepting compliments, they negate them, turning the spotlight away from their accomplishments.

The underlying message here is a deep-seated belief that they don’t deserve recognition or praise, which can be a significant barrier to self-love and acceptance.

2) Overachieving

Now, this might seem a bit surprising at first. I mean, isn’t aiming for excellence generally a good thing?

Well, in most cases, yes. But there’s a fine line between healthy ambition and pushing yourself too hard due to low self-esteem.

Women who don’t truly value themselves often feel the need to overcompensate by pushing themselves to their limits. They’re constantly chasing after achievements and recognition.

The tricky part here is that no matter how much they accomplish, it never feels like it’s enough. The validation they’re after seems to slip through their fingers because it’s based on external approval rather than their own sense of self-worth.

3) People-pleasing

People-pleasing is another common behavior among women who struggle with self-value. It’s a tendency to go out of their way to make others happy, often at the expense of their own needs and desires.

Being considerate and caring for others is wonderful, but when it becomes a pattern of self-neglect, it’s a clear sign of lacking self-value.

In my own journey towards self-love and recognition of my worth, I’ve seen this behavior play out in numerous ways. It often stems from an underlying fear of rejection or a need for approval and acceptance.

And guess what? I’ve written about this extensively in my book, Breaking The Attachment: How To Overcome Codependency in Your Relationship. It’s a treasure trove of insights and practical tools to overcome this behavior.

But for now, remember that saying ‘no’ doesn’t make you selfish. It simply means you’re respecting your own needs and boundaries. This understanding can be a game-changer in valuing yourself more genuinely.

4) Apologizing unnecessarily

We’ve all encountered someone who seems to say “sorry” more than necessary, right? This is another behavior that’s common among women who don’t genuinely value themselves.

They tend to apologize for things that aren’t their fault or for situations they couldn’t control. It’s as if they’re constantly on defense, ready to take the blame even when it’s not due.

In my experience, this can stem from the belief that they’re always in the wrong or that their feelings and thoughts are less valid than those of others.

I’m reminded of a powerful quote by Eleanor Roosevelt: “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” It’s a reminder that we hold the power over our self-worth and the perceptions we harbor about ourselves.

5) Accepting less than they deserve

Another clear sign can be seen in how women who don’t value themselves handle their relationships.

Whether it’s in personal or professional settings, they often end up settling for less than they deserve. They tolerate behaviors and situations that don’t serve them well simply because they believe they’re not worthy of anything better.

Bottom line—the way we let others treat us directly mirrors how much we value ourselves. When we don’t value ourselves, it’s easier to accept less than what we truly deserve.

6) Negative self-talk

The words we use to talk about ourselves are a clear indicator of our self-value. Women who don’t genuinely value themselves often engage in negative self-talk, berating themselves for the smallest mistakes or perceived inadequacies.

I’ve found that the dialogue we maintain with ourselves can be the most empowering or damaging factor in our lives. Negative self-talk only feeds into our insecurities and diminishes our self-esteem.

As Buddha wisely said, “What we think, we become.” The way we speak to ourselves shapes our reality and influences how we perceive ourselves.

For more insights like these, feel free to follow my page on Facebook. You’ll get all my latest articles right in your feed, offering more wisdom on self-love, relationships, and personal growth.

7) Avoiding mirrors

This might sound a bit blunt, but it’s a straightforward observation.

Women who struggle with valuing themselves often avoid mirrors. It’s a physical way of showing the discomfort they feel with their own appearance.

Looking in the mirror should be a moment of self-appreciation, a chance to recognize our unique beauty and worth. However, when a woman doesn’t truly value herself, mirrors become something to avoid.

They tend to focus on what they see as flaws and imperfections instead of embracing their individuality and unique beauty. It’s like they’re viewing themselves through a lens of self-criticism that distorts their true reflection.

Embrace your uniqueness: Love yourself, accept yourself! 

Recognizing and understanding behaviors that indicate a lack of genuine self-value is the first step towards change. It’s about peeling back the layers, revealing the raw, honest truth hidden beneath our unconscious patterns.

Remember, self-love and genuine self-appreciation are journeys, not destinations. They require consistent effort, introspection, and a willingness to confront uncomfortable truths about ourselves.

But rest assured, the journey is worth it. Because on the other side of this journey is a life lived with authenticity, dignity, and profound self-worth.

As a relationship expert, I believe delving deeper into these topics can facilitate personal growth and foster healthier relationships with both ourselves and others. This video by Justin Brown provides insightful exploration into these themes and offers valuable advice:

YouTube video

Change is possible, and it starts with you. Here’s to your journey of genuine self-value.

Did you like my article? Like me on Facebook to see more articles like this in your feed.