Most of us know a narcissist or two, even if we don’t know that we know it.

Narcissists get their name from Narcissus, who fell in love with his own reflection in a pool of water according to ancient Greek mythology. Modern narcissists might not go to that extreme, but the idea is pretty much the same.

When someone’s a narcissist, they elevate themselves over other people and believe that they’re better than everyone else. But how exactly can we spot them?

Let’s take a look, shall we?

1) They have a high sense of self-importance

Narcissists tend to believe that they’re the most important people on the planet, and so that naturally leads to a high sense of self-importance.

These are the kinds of people who treat service workers like dirt because they think that they’re much more important than any waiter or cashier could ever be.

They also tend to make for reckless drivers, because they’ll act as though they own the road and expect everyone else to get out of their way.

And it will never occur to them that they might be involved in a collision because they think of themselves as being the main character in life.

2) They exaggerate their achievements

Narcissists tend to have an ongoing habit of exaggerating their achievements to make it sound as though everything they touch turns to gold.

Of course, those of us in the real world know that failure is inevitable if you ever want to get anywhere in life, and so when a narcissist acts as though they never fail, they’re actually telling us that they never try anything new.

These show-off narcissists are perhaps the most annoying narcissists there are, because even though it’s likely to be super obvious to you that they’re exaggerating, they’ll expect you to believe them.

I normally just mumble at them noncommittally until they leave me alone.

3) They have a sense of entitlement

The narcissistic sense of entitlement is super common because of their high sense of self-importance. We see it in the way that they treat service people.

This sense of entitlement is a huge red flag and perhaps the easiest way of all to spot a narcissist. It’s also one of the more annoying things that narcissists get up to.

The thing to remember is that you can’t crumble under the pressure they apply and give them what they feel entitled to.

Instead, we need to show them that nobody is entitled to anything in this life, other than equal and fair treatment.

4) They’re arrogant

The narcissist’s high sense of self-importance and their belief in their own entitlement tends to also mean that they’re arrogant.

They think that they’re the best thing since sliced bread, and they often think that they’re even better than that. But while they’re sure enough of that in themselves, they also want other people to know how great they are.

And so because of that, they’ll keep saying things that showcase their arrogance, and they’ll make sure that everyone around them knows just how highly they think of themselves.

Sometimes, that arrogance is justified. But most of the time, it isn’t.

5) They expect special treatment

This point is a little like our third point in that the sense of entitlement is what leads people to expect special treatment.

Narcissists are the kinds of people who’ll say “do you know who I am?” and demand a free upgrade at a restaurant or at a hotel. And they’ll think that they deserve that free upgrade just by virtue of who they are.

Note that they don’t think they’ve done something that makes them worthy of this treatment. It’s very different to, say, a couple on their honeymoon who mention it at a hotel and are given an upgrade.

Again, the antidote to this is to make sure that these people are never given the special treatment that they crave.

6) They’re over-focused on power and success

Another of the big problems that we see with narcissists is that they’re often obsessed with money, fame and power.

Sure, most of us are chasing success in some form or other, but we also tend to make time in our lives for the people we love. Narcissists, though, will typically throw their friends and family under the metaphorical bus.

If you look at some of the most successful people in the world, from celebrities to CEOs, we can see that there are a heck of a lot of narcissists amongst them.

And there’s a reason for that. Their drive to succeed often ensures that they make it to the top of their field when others would have given up. It’s just that they’re narcissistic throughout the entirety of the journey.

7) They have few genuine relationships

Like I said, narcissists are often over-focused on power and success, and that doesn’t lend itself well to fostering healthy relationships.

On top of that, they often don’t actually care whether they have genuine relationships with people or not. Their narcissism means that they expect people to like them without them putting any effort in.

In other words, they feel entitled to be liked, and if someone doesn’t like them for any reason, they’ll just tell themselves that it’s the other person’s loss.

When you put all of this together, this means that narcissists tend to have a lot of contacts and acquaintances but few genuine friends.

8) They have superficial charm

This one doesn’t hold true for every narcissist, but I’ve noticed that a lot of them have this kind of superficial charm.

They’re the kind of people that everyone likes on the first meeting, but where that charm quickly wears off as time goes on. Often, people find it difficult to say exactly why they don’t like a narcissist; they just get a negative vibe from them.

I think this is often because people notice the superficial charm and then also notice when it disappears, even if they don’t know exactly what it is that they’ve noticed.

That superficial charm can’t last forever.

9) They display manipulative behavior

Last but by no means least, narcissists are often master manipulators.

They manipulate people because they know they can and they’re pretty good at it, and they also believe that they’re so important that people owe them anyway.

That’s one of the reasons why we have to pay close attention to narcissists if we want to make sure that they’re not taking advantage of us. If they think they can get away with it, they’ll do it.

Oh, and don’t make the mistake of thinking that all manipulators are narcissists. There’s a lot of crossover, but there are also some subtle differences.

Conclusion

Now that you know just a few of the ways that you can spot a narcissist according to psychology, you’re in a much better place to do it out in the wild.

It’s important to be able to spot narcissists if you want to make sure that they don’t take advantage of you, because the world is surprisingly full of them.

But with the knowledge you’ve learned today and a keen pair of eyes, you should be off to a solid start. You’ll be able to spot the narcissists, and that’s often the hardest part.

Now you just need to decide how you’re going to deal with them.