As humans, we’re all susceptible to influence, but not every influence is positive. In fact, some people can have a truly negative impact on our lives.

I’m Lachlan Brown, founder of Hack Spirit and a mindfulness and Buddhism enthusiast.

Through my journey, I’ve learned just how important the company we keep is to our overall well-being.

Psychology has identified several types of individuals who tend to have a consistently negative influence on those around them. Here they are.

1) The energy drainer

We all have that one person in our lives who seems to suck the energy right out of us.

Whether it’s their constant negativity, incessant complaints, or their need for attention, these individuals can be a real drain on our mental and emotional resources.

In mindfulness and Buddhism, we call these people energy vampires. They feed off your positivity and leave you feeling depleted.

According to psychologists, the impact of such individuals extends beyond just feeling tired or drained. They can cause stress, lower your self-esteem, and even lead to feelings of anxiety and depression.

In practicing mindfulness, we learn the importance of preserving our inner peace and maintaining a positive state of mind.

Constantly being around such negative influences can be detrimental to this process.

So it’s important to identify these energy drainers in your life. Once you’re aware of their impact, you can take steps to limit their influence or find ways to recharge after interacting with them. 

2) The perpetual pessimist

Another type of person who can negatively influence your life is the perpetual pessimist.

You know the type: everything is always going wrong, the world is out to get them, and there’s never a silver lining.

As someone who has spent a good deal of time studying and practicing mindfulness and Buddhism, I can tell you that this type of negativity can be incredibly damaging.

Not just to the individual themselves but also to those around them.

The Dalai Lama once said, “Happiness is not something ready-made. It comes from your own actions.”

This quote resonates deeply with me because it emphasizes the role our mindset plays in our overall well-being.

Perpetual pessimists have a way of spreading their negative outlook, making it difficult for those around them to maintain a positive mindset.

They can make us question our optimism and can dampen our spirits.

Recognizing the impact these individuals have on your life is the first step in mitigating their influence.

Surrounding yourself with positivity and optimism is an essential part of maintaining mental balance and fostering happiness.

3) The self-absorbed

At the heart of Buddhist teachings is the concept of selflessness. It’s about recognizing that we are all interconnected and that every action we take can impact others.

This is why individuals who are excessively self-absorbed can be a negative influence in our lives.

Self-absorbed people tend to put their own needs and desires above others, often without even realizing it.

They have a hard time empathizing with others and often fail to consider the impact of their actions on those around them.

Dealing with these individuals can be draining and disheartening. Their lack of concern for others can make us feel undervalued and overlooked.

Over time, this can lead to feelings of resentment and can negatively impact our self-esteem.

4) The constant critic

We all need constructive criticism from time to time. It’s how we grow and improve. However, there’s a significant difference between constructive feedback and constant criticism.

Being around a constant critic can be incredibly damaging to our self-esteem and overall mental health.

These individuals focus on the negatives, rarely acknowledging the positives. They are quick to point out mistakes, even when they are minute or irrelevant.

In mindfulness practice, we learn the importance of self-compassion and acceptance. We learn to acknowledge our strengths as well as our weaknesses and understand that no one is perfect.

Constant critics make it difficult for us to practice this self-compassion. They magnify our flaws and can make us feel inadequate or unworthy.

It’s important to know that their criticism often says more about them than it does about us.

Nonetheless, it’s essential to protect ourselves from this negativity by setting boundaries or distancing ourselves from these individuals when necessary.

5) The drama magnet

Life is full of ups and downs. It’s a roller-coaster ride of emotions, experiences, and events.

But for some people, life seems to be a never-ending soap opera with them at the center stage. Let’s call these individuals ‘drama magnets’.

Drama magnets turn even the smallest incidents into a major crisis. They thrive on chaos and seem to enjoy being in the middle of conflicts. This constant state of turmoil can be exhausting for those around them.

Speaking from personal experience, I can tell you that maintaining your inner peace in such a whirlwind of chaos can be challenging.

It’s one of the reasons I wrote my book “Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego“. The book explores the teachings of Buddhism that can help us maintain our tranquility in the face of such turmoil.

Buddhism teaches us about the impermanence of life and how we can find peace amidst the chaos by letting go of our attachment to drama and conflict.

6) The guilt tripper

We all make mistakes, and sometimes we need to make amends. But there’s a difference between acknowledging our wrongs and being consistently guilt-tripped by someone.

Guilt trippers have a tendency to manipulate situations, using guilt as a tool to get their way or to make us feel bad about ourselves.

They thrive on making us feel indebted or guilty, often for things that are beyond our control or entirely unrelated to us.

In mindfulness and Buddhism, we are taught about the importance of forgiveness and letting go.

Holding onto guilt does not serve us or lead us towards growth. Instead, it traps us in a cycle of negativity and self-deprecation.

Dealing with guilt trippers can be challenging because it plays into our fear of being a ‘bad’ person. 

Don’t let someone else’s manipulation cloud your judgment or define your self-worth. You are not defined by your mistakes but by how you learn and grow from them.

7) The over-helper

Here’s a counterintuitive one. Most would think that someone who’s always willing to help would be a positive influence in our lives. However, the over-helper can sometimes have the opposite effect.

Over-helpers often step in to offer assistance even when it’s not asked for or needed.

While their intentions may be good, their unsolicited help can undermine our confidence and ability to tackle challenges independently.

In mindfulness, we learn the importance of self-reliance and the power of overcoming obstacles on our own. These experiences not only build our resilience but also enhance our self-confidence.

While it’s great to have supportive people in our lives, it’s equally important to have the space to learn, grow, and make mistakes. Over-helpers, with their constant assistance, can deprive us of these crucial life experiences.

So if you find yourself constantly on the receiving end of unsolicited help, it might be worth having a conversation with the person involved. 

Final thoughts

Mindfulness and Buddhism teach us that we have the power to shape our lives. We can choose who we spend our time with and how we let them influence us.

If you want to delve deeper into this topic, I invite you to check out my book “Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego“. It explores these wisdom and teachings that can help you navigate life’s challenges with grace, strength, and a sense of calm.