7 types of people who can be a chore to be around, according to psychology

Tara Whitmore by Tara Whitmore | December 8, 2024, 8:32 am

Ever felt completely drained or stressed out after spending time with someone? You’re definitely not alone. Some people just have a knack for making social interactions feel like hard work.

These folks often share certain personality traits or behaviors—maybe they’re always negative, overly critical, or just plain difficult to deal with. Sound familiar?

Most of the time, these behaviors aren’t intentional. But understanding why certain personalities feel more challenging can make a huge difference in how we handle those interactions.

Curious to know why some people are just harder to vibe with? Let’s find out.

1) The constant complainer

We all have bad days and it’s normal to vent once in a while. But when it comes to the constant complainer, they seem to have a knack for seeing the glass half empty, all the time.

These individuals are experts at finding the negatives in every situation. Whether it’s the weather, their job, or their avocado toast at brunch, they always have something to complain about.

Interacting with them can be draining. You might feel like you’re always on damage control, trying to uplift their spirits or solve their problems.

While empathy is essential, you’re not responsible for their happiness. It’s important to set boundaries and maintain your own emotional health.

Also, their constant negativity isn’t necessarily a personal choice but could be a result of certain psychological factors.

This knowledge should not excuse their behavior but allows us to navigate interactions with them more effectively without feeling overwhelmed.

2) The over-enthusiast

Surprisingly, it’s not just the negative personalities that can be challenging to handle. Meet the over-enthusiast, who is always high on life and bursting with energy.

They can be a source of endless positivity, which, in theory, sounds great. But in reality, their constant cheerfulness can be exhausting.

You might feel pressured to match their energy level or feel guilty for not being as excited about life as they are. This can potentially create an emotional strain, leaving you feeling drained after interactions.

Of course, it’s okay to not always be ‘on’. We all have different energy levels and ways of expressing our emotions. Sometimes quiet reflection can be as beneficial as enthusiastic engagement.

3) The serial advice giver

We all need advice from time to time, but these individuals seem to have a suggestion for everything, even when it’s unsolicited.

People who are always eager to give advice might be trying to boost their own self-esteem or assert control. They may not realize that their constant stream of ‘shoulds’ and ‘oughts’ can feel overwhelming.

Being with a serial advice giver can be frustrating. You might start to feel like your own judgment is being undermined or that your experiences are being trivialized.

It’s important to keep in mind that you have a right to make your own decisions. While their advice might be well-intentioned, it’s also crucial for them to respect your autonomy and ability to navigate your own life.

4) The wallflower

These are the individuals who prefer to stay in the background, often overlooked in social situations.

They may not demand attention or contribute much to conversations, but that doesn’t mean they don’t have anything valuable to add. They might just need a little more time and space to open up.

Engaging with a wallflower can sometimes feel like hard work. You might feel pressured to fill the silence or make them feel included.

Everyone has a different comfort level when it comes to social interactions. Some people need more time to warm up, and that’s okay.

Patience and understanding can go a long way in making these interactions less daunting for both of you.

5) The one-upper

We’ve all encountered this person at some point in our lives. No matter what you’ve done or experienced, they’ve always done it bigger, better, or faster.

Maybe you just got back from a vacation in Hawaii, and they’ve been to Bora Bora. Or perhaps you’ve just run a 5k, and they’ve completed a marathon.

Interacting with a one-upper can be frustrating. It can feel like your achievements are being constantly overshadowed or diminished.

This is not a reflection of your worth or achievements. Your experiences and accomplishments are valid and unique to you. No one’s one-upmanship should take away from that truth.

6) The eternal pessimist

They’re the ones who, no matter what, always expect the worst outcome.

For instance, I once had a coworker who would always predict doom and gloom for every project we embarked on. Even when all signs pointed towards success, they’d find a way to forecast failure.

Dealing with an eternal pessimist can be draining. Their relentless negativity can sap the joy and excitement out of even the most promising situations.

It’s important to remember, though, that their outlook is not necessarily your reality. Stay grounded in your own positivity and don’t let their pessimistic lens influence your perspective.

7) The attention seeker

These are the individuals who dominate every conversation, turning it back to their experiences, achievements, or problems.

They’re the loudest at the party, always have a dramatic story to tell, and somehow always make it about them.

Hanging out with an attention seeker can feel like an emotional marathon. You might leave feeling unheard and unseen because every conversation becomes a one-person show.

As challenging as it might be, it’s important to set boundaries. It’s okay to gently steer the conversation away from them or express that you’d like your experiences to be acknowledged too.

Final thoughts

No matter which of these personalities you encounter, the most crucial thing to remember is to take care of yourself.

Whether it’s setting boundaries, taking a step back, or seeking support, your emotional health should always be your priority.

Interacting with challenging personalities can be tough, but it’s important not to let these situations drain you. 

You have control over how you react and engage. It’s perfectly okay to protect your peace and choose your battles wisely.

This article is here to guide you in recognizing the personalities that may challenge your patience and drain your energy, but ultimately, it’s up to you to decide how to manage these interactions.

Time spent maintaining your emotional health is never wasted.