It’s true: When it comes to human interactions, honesty is the best policy. And authenticity is the only currency that never depreciates.

Yet, sometimes it feels like regardless of how genuine you try to be, people just aren’t buying it. You might feel as if you’re being your authentic self but still sense that others are questioning your sincerity.

If you’re nodding yes, don’t worry. You’re not alone in this struggle.

We can all sometimes unintentionally do things that make people question our authenticity. Often, we aren’t even aware we’re doing them.

So today, we’re going to expose those seven things you’re unknowingly doing that make people question your authenticity.

1) You’re not being consistent

The first time I realized inconsistency was a problem was back in high school. I was the captain of the debate team and I’d switch my stance on issues depending on who I was talking to. My teammates quickly picked up on it and started questioning my sincerity.

Inconsistency is a clear authenticity killer. If you’re saying one thing today and something completely different tomorrow, people will start to doubt your authenticity.

We all change our minds, sure – but if it’s a recurring pattern, it might be time to check in with yourself about what you truly believe.

2) You’re trying too hard to impress

I’ll admit it – I’ve been guilty of this one. Early in my career, I would try to emulate the behaviors and attitudes of those who were successful in my field. I was so focused on impressing them that I lost sight of who I really was.

Trying too hard to impress can be a sign that you’re not comfortable with your own authenticity. When you’re genuinely being yourself, there’s no need to put on a performance for others. People can sense when someone is being authentic and when they’re putting on a show.

So, be yourself – trust me, it’s enough!

3) You’re not showing vulnerability

Did you know that vulnerability is actually a strength?

Research by Dr. Brené Brown, a renowned expert on vulnerability, shows that the willingness to show vulnerability is directly linked to authenticity.

When we try to appear perfect and hide our flaws, it can make people question whether we’re being genuine. Authenticity means acknowledging that we’re human and that we make mistakes. So, don’t be afraid to show your vulnerabilities. It only makes you more real to others.

4) You’re not listening to others

Listening is an act of kindness that can often be overlooked.

When we don’t take the time to genuinely listen to others, it can come across as though we’re only interested in our own thoughts and opinions. This can make it hard for others to see our authentic selves.

Authenticity is about being real and that includes being genuinely interested in others. So next time someone shares a story or an idea with you, take the time to truly listen. You might be surprised at the connections you make when you open your heart and mind to others.

5) You’re not owning your mistakes

I remember a time early in my career when I made a big mistake on a project. My initial instinct was to hide it and hope nobody noticed. But the guilt was eating me up inside.

So, I took a deep breath and confessed my mistake to my boss. To my surprise, he appreciated my honesty and we worked together to fix the issue.

From that day forward, I realized that owning up to our mistakes is a powerful way to show authenticity. When you make a mistake, don’t shy away from it. Own it, learn from it, and move on. That’s what real, authentic people do.

6) You’re not aligning your actions with your words

We’ve all heard the phrase “actions speak louder than words.” It might be a cliché, but it’s true. If your actions don’t match what you say, it can lead people to question your authenticity.

For instance, if you talk about the importance of teamwork but then hog all the credit, it sends confusing signals. Make sure that what you say and what you do are in harmony. Alignment of words and actions is a clear demonstration of authenticity.

7) You’re not being true to your values

This one might be the hardest because it requires introspection. Your values are the compass that guides your decisions and behaviors. When you stray from them, it’s hard for others to see you as authentic.

Years ago, I was offered a job that paid really well but went against everything I believed in. I was tempted to take it, but deep down I knew it wouldn’t feel right. So, I turned it down. It was a tough decision, but it felt authentic.

Living according to your values sometimes means making hard choices. But remember, authenticity isn’t about being liked by everyone. It’s about being true to who you are.

Life’s too short to be a knock-off

In conclusion, authenticity isn’t just a desirable trait—it’s the cornerstone of genuine connections and meaningful relationships. However, in our pursuit of authenticity, we may inadvertently sabotage it.

When we’re aware of the factors that might spark doubts about our authenticity, we can fine-tune our genuine selves and earn more trust wherever we go.

Always bear in mind, the essence of authenticity lies in embracing our true selves, flaws, mistakes, vulnerabilities, and all. It’s in this raw authenticity that we find our true strength and forge deeper connections with others.