Finding your way around the social world with grace isn’t always straightforward.

Why?

Because it’s more than just saying the right things—it’s communicating effectively and understanding others on a deeper level.

That’s where emotional intelligence comes in.

It’s the ability to recognize, understand, and manage not only your own emotions but also those of the people around you.

When you’re high in emotional intelligence, you’re often better at managing social situations.

And guess what?

There are certain things you’re doing in public that can signal your high emotional intelligence to others.

Let’s dive into these things you’re doing in public that signal high emotional intelligence.

By the end, you’ll be able to identify these traits in yourself and others.

So, let’s get started, shall we?

1) Actively listening

Active listening goes beyond just hearing someone’s words. It involves tuning into their non-verbal cues, empathizing with their feelings, and responding in a way that shows you really understand.

You don’t just wait for your turn to speak or think about what you’re going to say next. You need to be fully present in the conversation and show genuine interest in the other person’s perspective.

When you do this, it shows that you’re not just focused on your own thoughts and feelings, but also deeply attuned to those of others.

But remember: active listening doesn’t simply mean agreeing with everything someone says or feeling the need to solve their problems. It means understanding and validating the other person’s experiences.

2) Keeping cool under pressure

We’ve all been there – in a situation that’s stressful, frustrating, or just plain overwhelming.

And how we handle these situations can say a lot about our emotional intelligence.

For instance, I was once in a high-stakes meeting with a client who was unhappy with the progress of our project. Tensions were high, and the client was clearly upset. It would have been easy to get defensive, to argue, or to let my emotions get the better of me.

But instead, I took a deep breath and focused on staying calm.

I listened to the client’s concerns, validated their feelings, and worked collaboratively to find a solution.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I was suppressing my own feelings or letting the client walk all over me. It’s that the situation calls for me to manage my emotions effectively in order to handle the situation in the most constructive way possible.

Keeping your cool under pressure shows that you’re not only aware of your own emotions but also able to manage them effectively.

It’s a key sign of high emotional intelligence and one that can greatly impact how others perceive you in public situations.

3) Being adaptable

Life is unpredictable. Plans change, obstacles arise, and sometimes, things just don’t go the way we envisioned.

In these situations, emotional intelligence shows in our ability to adapt.

Take chameleons, for example. Did you know they can change their color to suit their environment?

This is a skill that helps them survive in the wild. Similarly, people with high emotional intelligence can adjust their behavior and responses to suit different situations.

Whether it’s being sensitive to cultural differences, adjusting your communication style to suit the person you’re speaking with, or simply being open to new ideas and perspectives – adaptability is a clear sign of high emotional intelligence.

4) Demonstrating empathy

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. It’s like stepping into someone else’s shoes and seeing the world from their perspective.

People with high emotional intelligence often show empathy in their interactions. They’re attentive to people’s feelings and needs, and they respond in a way that shows understanding and compassion.

This doesn’t mean you have to agree with everything they say or do. But it does mean recognizing their emotions and validating their experiences.

5) Accepting feedback gracefully

Feedback, whether positive or negative, is a fundamental part of growth.

However, accepting feedback, particularly when it’s critical, can be challenging.

But when you have high emotional intelligence, you also have the ability to accept feedback gracefully. You understand that feedback isn’t a personal attack but an opportunity for learning and improvement.

For example, if a manager points out an area where you could improve, instead of getting defensive or upset, you take it on board and consider how you can use it to better your performance.

This ability to accept, reflect on, and implement feedback not only signals high emotional intelligence but also fosters personal growth and development. It shows that you value learning and are open to perspectives other than your own.

6) Expressing gratitude

In a world that often focuses on what we lack, expressing gratitude can be a powerful practice.

For instance, thanking a colleague for their help on a project isn’t just polite. It acknowledges their effort and contribution, fostering a positive relationship and mutual respect.

What I’m trying to say is that it’s not as simple as saying “thank you.” It’s an acknowledgment of the kindness and efforts of others, and it’s a sign of high emotional intelligence.

Because when you express gratitude, you’re recognizing the positive in your life and in others. You’re focusing on what you have rather than what you don’t.

7) Managing conflict effectively

Several years ago, I found myself in the middle of a heated disagreement with a close friend. Things escalated quickly, and it would have been easy to let anger and pride take over, potentially damaging our relationship.

Instead, I took a step back and made an effort to understand her perspective. By acknowledging her feelings and expressing my own without blame, we were able to find a resolution that respected both our viewpoints.

Because of this, I understood that conflict is an inevitable part of life. Whether it’s a minor disagreement with a friend or a major dispute at work, how we handle these situations can signal our level of emotional intelligence.

8) Showing resilience

Life is full of ups and downs. Challenges, disappointments, and failures are inevitable.

But it’s how we react to these hardships that truly defines us.

And to have high emotional intelligence is to show a great deal of resilience. You understand that setbacks are a part of life and see them not as insurmountable obstacles but as opportunities for growth.

You might face a job loss, for example, and instead of wallowing in self-pity, you’ll assess your skills, consider your options, and take steps towards finding a new opportunity.

9) Practicing self-awareness

Being self-aware means knowing your strengths and weaknesses, understanding your triggers, and being able to manage your emotional responses.

For example, if you know that you tend to get impatient when under pressure, you can develop strategies to manage this reaction.

This is why self-awareness is at the core of emotional intelligence; it’s the foundation on which all other elements are built.

Without self-awareness, it’s difficult to manage our emotions, empathize with others, navigate social situations, or make sound decisions.

And while practicing self-awareness is a lifelong journey, it’s one that can greatly enhance your emotional intelligence and enrich your relationships with others. 

Final reflection: It’s a journey

Emotional intelligence isn’t something you’re born with or without; it’s a skill that can be learned, practiced, and improved over time.

Your journey with emotional growth is deeply personal, but when you feel alone, remember that it’s something that profoundly affects our relationships with others.

Because the beauty of emotional intelligence lies in its universal relevance. Regardless of your profession, age, or background, developing emotional intelligence can enhance your interpersonal relationships, increase your self-understanding, and improve your overall quality of life.

So, together, let us continue to learn, grow, and strive for better understanding of ourselves and the world around us.