10 things you don’t owe anyone an explanation for, according to psychology

Lucas Graham by Lucas Graham | September 2, 2024, 11:12 am

We all lead complex, layered lives, but sometimes we find ourselves burdened with expectations and demands that are not ours to carry.

You might find yourself constantly explaining your choices, your lifestyle, your dreams, or even your past.

But have you ever stopped to ask if you really owe anyone these explanations?

How do you know if what you are doing is necessary or if it’s just a habitual response to societal pressures?

As a result of introspection and extensive research into the human psyche, I’ve compiled a list of 10 things that, according to psychology, you don’t owe anyone an explanation for.

If these hit home, it might be time to reclaim some of your personal autonomy.

1) Your life choices

Let’s face it, we all make choices – big and small – on a daily basis.

And not everyone is going to agree with them.

Psychology reveals that it’s our human desire for validation that often leads us to feel obliged to explain our decisions.

But here’s the thing: You’re the one living your life, not them.

Whether it’s about your career, your relationships, or even your dietary habits, you get to call the shots.

So next time you find yourself on the verge of justifying a personal decision, remember this: Your life choices are just that – yours.

You don’t owe anyone an explanation for them.

As long as you’re not harming others or breaking any laws, you have the autonomy to make decisions based on what feels right for you.

And that’s completely okay.

2) Your career path

In an era where success is often equated with professional achievement, it’s common to feel the need to justify your career choices, especially if they steer from the traditional path.

Perhaps you’ve chosen a non-conventional career or decided to step back from a high-powered job to pursue something more fulfilling.

Maybe you’re still figuring things out or juggling multiple roles.

Psychology asserts that your career path is a personal journey that doesn’t need validation from others.

You don’t owe an explanation for your professional decisions.

After all, success is subjective, and what matters most is your satisfaction and happiness.

3) Your relationship status

In a society where romantic relationships are often seen as a measure of happiness and completeness, it seems like our relationship status is a topic of endless curiosity for others.

You might find people prying into why you’re still single, or why you’re not married yet, or even why you’re dating the person you are.

It might be easy to feel pressured to justify your relationship status.

However, whether you’re single, in a relationship, married, divorced, or it’s complicated, it’s important to remember that your relationship status is your business and yours alone.

  Your happiness is not defined by society’s relationship norms but by your own personal contentment.

As long as your decisions are leading to your own happiness and growth, that’s all that matters.

You don’t owe anyone an explanation for your relationship status.

It’s entirely your business who you choose to date, marry, or stay single for.

4) Your appearance

How you choose to present yourself to the world is a deeply personal decision.

From your hairstyle to your wardrobe choices, these are all reflections of your individuality.

Fashion trends come and go, but personal style is enduring, unique, and deeply personal.

It speaks volumes about your personality and individuality.

Sadly, societal norms and standards often create unnecessary pressure, making us feel like we need to explain or justify our appearance.

In a world that often values conformity, it’s easy to feel the need to justify why you dress the way you do, especially if your style diverges from the norm. 

But here’s a crucial reminder: Your body, your rules.

Whether you prefer dressing up or staying casual, whether you love makeup or prefer going natural, it’s completely up to you.

You don’t owe anyone an explanation for your appearance.

It’s an expression of who you are and an extension of your self-identity.

You have every right to express yourself in the way that makes you feel the most comfortable and authentic.

5) Your personal boundaries

In a society that often blurs the lines of personal space, it’s easy to forget that your boundaries are sacred.

They act as a fortress, safeguarding your emotional, mental, and physical well-being.

We are often conditioned to feel guilty or selfish for enforcing these boundaries.

However, it is not only healthy but essential to establish and maintain them.

It’s okay to protect your peace.

It’s okay to say ‘no’ if something doesn’t sit well with you. It’s okay to prioritize your mental health over pleasing others.

Your boundaries are not a topic for debate or negotiation.

You don’t owe anyone an explanation for what makes you comfortable, safe, and respected.

Boundaries are essential for your well-being and it’s your right to enforce them without having to justify yourself.

6) Your dietary choices

In a world where food trends and diet fads are rampant, it’s common to find people questioning, and sometimes even criticizing, the dietary choices of others.

Whether you’re vegan, paleo, gluten-free, or you simply enjoy everything on your plate, your individual dietary choices are personal and unique to you.

They can be based on anything from health needs to ethical beliefs.

Contrary to popular belief, it’s not mandatory to explain or justify why you eat the way you do.

Your diet is a personal matter and you owe no one an explanation for it.

After all, what goes into your body should only be of concern to you.

7) Your past

We’ve all got a history, full of ups, downs, twists, and turns.

And it’s this unique journey that shapes us into who we are today.

Psychology reminds us that our past, while informative, does not define our future or our present worth.

Sometimes, people around us may demand explanations or hold us captive to our past.

They may use them to undermine our growth or challenge our present selves.

But remember, your past is your personal narrative.

You have the power to choose who you share it with and how much you reveal.

You don’t owe anyone a detailed account or justification for your previous chapters.

You are not defined by your past.

You also don’t owe anyone an explanation or justification for your past mistakes.

They are lessons that have shaped you and helped you grow into the person you are today.

You’ve faced your past mistakes, learned from them, and moved on – that’s all that matters.

8) Your financial decisions

Money matters can be a touchy subject, and everyone seems to have an opinion on how you should handle your finances.

Whether it’s your spending habits, your savings, or your investments, it often feels like you’re under scrutiny.

But here’s the reality: Your financial decisions are your own. Everyone has different financial goals, obligations, and comfort zones.

What works for one person might not work for another.

You don’t owe anyone an explanation for your financial decisions.

As long as you’re managing your money responsibly and it aligns with your personal goals and values, that’s all that matters.

9) Your parenting style

Parenting is one of the most challenging roles anyone can undertake.

And much like any other role in life, there’s no one-size-fits-all approach to it.

What works for one child might not work for another.

Some parents might prefer a stricter, more discipline-led approach, while others might lean more towards a permissive style.

Just remember this – you’re doing the best you can with what you know and have.

Your parenting style is unique to you and your child.

You don’t owe anyone an explanation for how you choose to raise your children, as long as it’s in their best interest and doesn’t harm them in any way.

10) Your self-care routines

Self-care is about nurturing your mind, body, and soul.

It’s about taking the time to rest, rejuvenate, and replenish your energy.

Despite its importance, self-care is often misunderstood and sometimes even stigmatized.

You might find yourself explaining why you need to meditate daily, take that solo trip, or simply spend a weekend disconnected from the world.

But here’s the most important thing you should know about this: Self-care is not selfish. It’s necessary.

And everyone’s self-care routine looks different because we all have different needs.

You don’t owe anyone an explanation for how you choose to take care of yourself.

This is your journey and you have every right to take the steps necessary to maintain your health and happiness.

Remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup. Take care of yourself first.

Final reflection: Embrace your autonomy

Living your life authentically, without feeling the need to justify your choices, is an empowering journey of personal autonomy.

It’s about understanding that your life is yours to live, and the choices you make are yours to own.

Yet, it’s not always easy to navigate this path, especially when societal norms and expectations constantly push us towards conformity.

The pressure to explain and validate our choices can sometimes feel overwhelming. But remember, you hold the reins of your life.

It’s vital to remember that each of us possesses the right to make decisions about our lives without needing to explain or justify them to others.

Whether it’s about your past, your parenting style, your financial choices, or even your self-care routine, these are deeply personal aspects of your life.

They define who you are and how you interact with the world around you.

As you navigate through life, remember this: You don’t owe anyone an explanation for the choices you make. 

What matters most is that your decisions align with your values and contribute to your happiness and well-being.

Ultimately, embracing this mindset is a journey towards self-acceptance and growth.

It’s about standing firm in your truth and living a life that reflects your values and aspirations.

So, let go of the need to explain and embrace the freedom and autonomy that come with owning your choices.

Live authentically.

And always remember that you have the right to make choices that serve you best, without any need for justification.