When you’re an introvert, you process life a little differently than your more extroverted friends and colleagues. 

There are certain situations that are more enjoyable for you than an extrovert and vice versa. 

When it comes to the scenarios that are harder for an introvert to deal with, psychology provides valuable insights about why this is and what introverts prefer instead. 

If you consider yourself or somebody you love introverted, see if you or they can relate to the following unenjoyable situations. 

1) Large social events

As an introvert, you find yourself quite allergic to large social events. 

It’s not that you’re antisocial or don’t appreciate people, it’s simply that crowded and noisy shindigs push all the wrong buttons for you.

They’re both disorienting and frustrating, leaving you drained and distracted from your goals and priorities in life. 

As such, you do your best to avoid them. 

“It’s not true that introverts hate social interaction and avoid it entirely,” notes psychology writer Crystal Raypole. “All the same, you might find yourself needing more time to recharge between events than a more extroverted person.”

2) Chit chat and small talk

Small talk and chit chat just aren’t for you. 

While introverts tend to be high in emotional intelligence (EQ) and understand the social lubricating function and place of small talk, they’re not very fond of it nonetheless. 

If possible, you seek to duck out when there’s a lot of chitchat and small talk going on. 

Whether it’s work or a social occasion, you find it quite hard to abide more than a few moments of irrelevant gossip and small talk. 

It tires you out and leaves you, frankly, profoundly bored. 

3) Networking and transactional interactions

Networking is another aspect of life that’s often partly inevitable. 

But introverts do their best to minimize how much networking they have to do and be around. 

This relates to transactional relationships and interactions as a whole, which leave the introvert feeling drained and bored. 

They want deep relationships even if it means a lower amount of relationships and cutting out some purely transactional connections. 

“Instead of having a large social circle of people they know only on a superficial level, introverts prefer to stick to deep, long-lasting relationships marked by a great deal of closeness and intimacy,” notes psychosocial rehabilitation specialist and psychology educator Kendra Cherry, MSEd.

4) Group work and consensus-based situations 

When it comes to group work, you strongly dislike group work or scenarios where consensus is required. 

You prefer to work on your own volition and accomplish tasks at your own pace or at least under the strength of your own merits. 

Relying on others or waiting for everybody to agree before proceeding is exhausting to you:

Rather than finding such a process clarifying or refreshing, you find the opposite. 

The need to accommodate everyone and to match pace with a variety of people lessens your creative and vocational edge.

5) Multi-tasking and simultaneous demands on your attention

The introvert tends to be best in solitude or with a small, core group of close friends or coworkers. 

When there is a lot of multi-tasking or simultaneous demands on your attention, you usually switch off. 

The high pace of a hectic atmosphere or many people looking for your attention at the same time is guaranteed to leave you both frazzled and depleted. 

It’s not your jam, to say the least. 

As Cherry observes: “When introverts have to spend time in activities or environments that are very hectic, they can end up feeling unfocused and overwhelmed.”

6) Public speaking and presentations

Public speaking and presentations leave you flustered and drained of energy. 

You find it exhausting even in the most pedestrian of circumstances. 

Handling all the expectations of those you’re speaking to (even a small crowd) and trying to keep their attention is exhausting. 

Even if you’re quite skilled at public speaking, you don’t enjoy it. 

It’s exhausting and emotionally draining for you at the most fundamental level. 

7) Open office layouts

When it comes to the way your workplace is laid out, an open office design and a highly collaborative and social workplace is very hard to deal with. 

It exhausts you to have a ton of back-and-forth at the workplace, even if it’s a remote job. 

In terms of an in-person job, an open office layout is also not your cup of tea.

You like to be able to have your own office or work space where you can focus in peace and quiet without dealing with unexpected requests, comments or conversations. 

“As you might imagine, jobs that require a great deal of social interaction usually hold little appeal to people high in introversion,” Cherry explains.

8) Customer service and sales jobs

Jobs that require lots of talking aren’t well suited to the introvert. 

This is especially true of front-facing customer service roles and sales jobs that require pitching and selling to people. 

The introvert is friendly and connected to people in rare and deep circumstances; forming surface-level connections to sell something or please a customer is anathema to them. 

If this sounds like you then you’re not alone:

Introverts aren’t well suited to the kinds of tasks that require forming light and rapid social bonds for the sake of business. 

9) Social media fixation 

Social media can be a fascinating place that’s full of updates, information and ways to stay in touch. 

But if you’re an introvert, then you’re very much turned off by those who spend too much time on social media or overshare on social media. 

Generally speaking you prefer to have a small and tight circle of friends, which doesn’t usually lend itself to the kinds of activity on platforms like Facebook and Instagram. 

You find staying in touch with many different people exhausting and not really your cup of tea, and you also prefer not to share many details of your personal life on social media. 

This relates to a broader pattern of usually not being the first one to reach out socially in general. 

As Professor Emerita Susan Krauss Whitbourne, PhD. explains: “All other things being equal, people high in introversion don’t reach out voluntarily to their social circles.”

10) Crowded public transport

Very few people enjoy being on a crowded bus or subway car; but for the introvert it goes beyond mere annoyance. 

If you’re an introvert, then spending even a short time on a very crowded public transport system can ruin your day. 

It leaves you feeling exhausted and overwhelmed in a way that can take hours to recover from. 

It’s not that you’re such a “sensitive snowflake” or anything like that:

It’s simply that your own energetic and emotional center, once shaken, takes time to put back together and put to good use once again! 

“Whether it’s making your way through a crowded bus station or just navigating a crowded street, if you’re an introvert you most likely don’t seek a great deal of contact with others,” notes Whitbourne.

11) Being the center of attention

Whereas more extroverted people may seek the spotlight, you find yourself avoiding it whenever possible. 

As an introvert, being in close contact with others and being the center of attention is the opposite of what you want. 

Even if you’re quite ambitious and self-confident, you don’t enjoy people’s eyes on you:

You like your privacy and your own space. 

12) Spontaneous social invitations

While introverts do enjoy select social occasions and deep connections, they are not fond of being unexpectedly called on without notice. 

Whether it’s a video call coming out of nowhere on Whatsapp or Facebook, or a knock on the door from a friend they haven’t seen in weeks, they don’t like it. 

If this sounds like you, then you can certainly relate to the fact that this experience of spontaneous social interactions being utterly exhausting and distracting for you. 

It’s also true that there’s a cultural element to how much we are expected to be extroverted in order to be considered a friendly and classy individual. 

As psychology researcher and author Beverley Flaxington writes: “In many Scandinavian and Asian countries introversion is actually a highly desired and valued quality, whereas in our Western culture the opposite holds true.”

The introverted experience

As an introvert, it’s important to recognize one’s challenges and one’s strengths. 

There are some situations that are easy for extroverts, but just aren’t our cup of tea:

Rather than being a weakness, this can be a definite advantage. 

As always, self-awareness and valuing oneself is the key.