9 things emotionally intelligent people always do in relationships

Isabella Chase by Isabella Chase | May 18, 2024, 6:44 pm

Being emotionally intelligent is a game-changer in relationships. It’s about understanding your emotions and those of others, and using this knowledge to navigate interactions and build stronger bonds.

In relationships, emotionally intelligent people always seem to do a few things differently. They have habits and mindsets that set them apart, allowing them to create and maintain healthier, happier relationships.

If you’re curious about what these habits might be, I’ve got some insights to share. Here are 9 things emotionally intelligent people consistently do in relationships.

Buckle up, and let’s dive into the world of emotional intelligence!

1) They listen

Emotionally intelligent individuals know the power of active listening.

In relationships, we often juggle multiple roles, conversations, and emotions. It’s easy to get lost in the noise. But emotionally intelligent people make a conscious effort to listen – truly listen – to their partners.

Listening is more than just hearing the words. It’s about understanding the feelings and thoughts behind those words. It’s about validating the other person’s reality and acknowledging their experience.

Emotionally intelligent people don’t just wait for their turn to talk, they immerse themselves in their partner’s world. They empathize, ask insightful questions, and encourage deeper conversation.

2) They embrace vulnerability

I’ve learned that one of the things emotionally intelligent people do differently is they aren’t afraid to be vulnerable.

In my own relationship, there was a time when I was wrestling with some personal issues. Instead of keeping it to myself, I chose to share my struggles with my partner. This wasn’t easy for me as I’ve always been someone who prided myself on being strong and independent.

But I realized that being emotionally intelligent isn’t about always having it together. It’s about being open about your feelings, even when they make you feel exposed or uncomfortable.

When I opened up to my partner, it didn’t make me weak. Instead, it brought us closer. My partner appreciated my honesty and it gave them a chance to support me in a way they wouldn’t have been able to do otherwise.

3) They’re aware of their emotional triggers

Emotionally intelligent people are adept at managing their emotions because they understand what triggers them. This is a critical skill in relationships, where emotions can run high and conflicts can easily escalate.

Take the case of stress, for instance. Research suggests that chronic stress can lead to decreased empathy and impaired emotional control. Now, imagine a scenario where both partners in a relationship are under constant stress. It’s a recipe for misunderstandings and escalated conflicts.

But when you’re aware of your triggers, you’re better equipped to manage your reactions. You can take steps to calm yourself down or express your feelings in a constructive way.

4) They practice empathy

Empathy is a cornerstone of emotional intelligence and it plays a pivotal role in relationships.

Emotionally intelligent people are experts in putting themselves in their partner’s shoes. They don’t just understand their partner’s perspective, they feel it. This enables them to respond in a way that acknowledges their partner’s feelings and needs.

Practicing empathy doesn’t mean agreeing with everything your partner says or does. It means validating their emotions and demonstrating that you care about their experience.

This habit of empathetic understanding fosters trust, deepens connection, and makes conflict resolution easier.

5) They express their feelings effectively

One of the standout qualities of emotionally intelligent people is their ability to express their feelings effectively. They don’t just react; they articulate their emotions in a clear, non-confrontational way.

This means owning their feelings by using “I” statements instead of “you” statements. For example, instead of saying “You never listen to me,” they would say, “I feel unheard when I’m talking and you’re on your phone.”

This shift in language takes the blame away from the partner and focuses on the speaker’s emotions. It promotes open and honest communication, which is essential for a healthy relationship.

6) They offer unconditional support

Emotionally intelligent people understand that love isn’t just about being there during the good times, it’s about offering unwavering support during the hard times as well.

They’re the ones who stand by their partner’s side when life throws a curveball, offering a shoulder to lean on, words of comfort, or simply their silent presence. They know that sometimes, all their partner needs is to know they’re not alone.

They don’t judge; they don’t criticize. Even when they don’t fully understand what their partner is going through, they offer their support unconditionally.

In doing so, emotionally intelligent people create a safe space for their partner to be vulnerable, to share their fears and anxieties without fear of judgment or rejection. This kind of unconditional support builds a strong foundation of trust and intimacy in a relationship.

7) They know when to step back

Understanding when to step back is a subtle art that emotionally intelligent people have mastered. It’s about giving your partner the space they need, even when all you want to do is help.

I remember a time when my partner was dealing with a challenging situation at work. I, being the problem-solver that I am, jumped in with advice and suggestions. But instead of helping, it only seemed to stress them out more.

That’s when I realized that sometimes, people don’t need solutions. They just need to be heard. They need to process their feelings and thoughts in their own time and in their own way.

So, I stepped back. I listened, I empathized, but I didn’t try to fix anything. And that made all the difference.

8) They value growth

Emotionally intelligent people are committed to growth, both individually and as a couple. They understand that change is inevitable and they embrace it as an opportunity for learning and development.

They don’t shy away from difficult conversations or situations. Instead, they see these as chances to deepen their understanding of each other and strengthen their bond.

They are open to feedback and are willing to work on their shortcomings. They don’t see mistakes as failures, but as stepping stones towards becoming better versions of themselves.

Valuing growth means acknowledging that no relationship is perfect and that there’s always room for improvement. Emotionally intelligent people keep this in mind, ensuring they’re constantly evolving and nurturing their relationship.

9) They choose love

Last but not lease, at the heart of it all, emotionally intelligent people choose love.

They understand that love isn’t just a feeling, it’s a choice that they make every single day.

They choose to be kind, even when they’re upset.

They choose to forgive, even when they’re hurt.

They choose to understand, even when they’re confused.

They choose their partner, with all their strengths and weaknesses, knowing that love is more than just the good times.

It’s about standing together through the challenges and emerging stronger on the other side.

Choosing love is about commitment, understanding, patience, and above all, respect for each other. It’s these daily choices that make relationships strong, resilient, and truly fulfilling.

Final thoughts: It’s about connection

The dance of human relationships is an elaborate play of emotions, understanding, and mutual respect. At its core, it’s about connection – a connection that goes beyond mere words and touches the heart.

Emotional intelligence plays a central role in building and nurturing this connection. It’s not just about understanding and managing our own emotions, but also about empathizing with others and responding to their emotions in a considerate manner.

Research from the University of Cambridge suggests that emotional intelligence is a key determinant of relationship satisfaction. It’s not surprising then that emotionally intelligent people seem to excel in their relationships.

They listen, they empathize, they express their feelings effectively, and above all, they choose to love – every day.

As we navigate our relationships, let’s take a page from their book. Let’s strive to understand and be understood, to empathize and be empathized with, to love and be loved. Because at the end of the day, it’s these connections that make our lives truly meaningful!