9 things about yourself you should never share with other people

Lucas Graham by Lucas Graham | August 14, 2024, 9:47 am

Hey there, I hope you’re doing great today!

We all know that sharing is caring, right?

But sometimes, and just sometimes, oversharing can lead to some uncomfortable moments or even worse, it can harm us professionally or personally.

That’s why I’ve put together this list of 9 things about yourself you should never share with other people. It’s not about being secretive, but more about maintaining a healthy boundary.

So, let’s dive in and see what they are!

1) Your personal problems

We all have issues, don’t we? But here’s the thing, constantly talking about your personal problems can make you appear as a complainer and nobody wants to be around a Negative Nancy.

It’s okay to share when you’re going through a tough time, but remember, there’s a fine line between sharing and oversharing.

Your close friends and family are there for support but for others, it’s often best to keep things light and positive.

So next time you’re about to delve into your personal issues, take a pause and consider if it’s the right thing to share or not.

2) Your salary

Let me share something with you. Once upon a time, I casually mentioned my salary during a conversation with friends. It seemed harmless at the moment, but it quickly turned into a sticky situation.

Some of them started comparing their earnings with mine, and it led to some unnecessary tension in our group.

Lesson learned? Money matters can be a delicate topic, so it’s better to keep your salary details to yourself.

Not only does it prevent potential jealousy or awkwardness, but it also helps maintain professional boundaries, especially if you work in the same industry or company as your friends.

3) Your past resentments

Did you know that holding onto resentment can be harmful to your health? In fact, studies have shown that it can lead to increased stress and even heart disease.

While it may be tempting to vent about past grudges or resentments, often, it just stirs up negative energy and doesn’t serve any constructive purpose.

It’s not about hiding your feelings, but rather about knowing when and how to express them in a healthy way. So instead of constantly bringing up past resentments, focus on the present and the positive aspects of your life.

4) Your insecurities

We all have insecurities. But sharing them with everyone can make us vulnerable to unnecessary criticism or judgement. It’s important to remember that everyone is dealing with their own battles, and it’s our job to manage our insecurities.

This is where mental toughness or resilience comes in handy. In my book, “The Art of Resilience: A Practical Guide to Developing Mental Toughness”, I talk about how we can use our insecurities as a driving force to build resilience.

Instead of sharing your insecurities with everyone, use them as a motivation to improve yourself and become stronger.

Always keep in mind, true strength lies in facing our fears and insecurities, not in revealing them to everyone around us.

5) Your relationship issues

Once, I was going through a rough patch in my relationship. It was a tough time, but I realized that talking about it with everyone wasn’t really helping. It was only fueling the fire and making things more complicated.

Confiding in a trusted friend or seeking professional help is one thing, but sharing your relationship issues with everyone can often backfire.

At the end of the day, it’s your relationship and most of the times you are the best judge of what’s right or wrong for you.

So, before discussing your relationship issues with others, consider the potential consequences and whether it will actually be beneficial in resolving the problem.

6) Your good deeds

Here’s a twist: sharing your good deeds. Sounds strange, right? I mean, we’re all taught that doing good is a virtue. But here’s the catch: constantly talking about your good deeds can come off as bragging or seeking validation.

True kindness doesn’t require recognition. The joy of helping others should be reward enough. So next time you do something good, try to keep it to yourself.

Not only will it make your act of kindness more genuine, but it also allows the person you’re helping to maintain their dignity.

7) Your family’s dirty laundry

Every family has its quirks and issues. But airing your family’s dirty laundry in public isn’t the best idea. It’s not just about maintaining privacy, but most of the time, it’s also about respect.

Your family members trust you with their secrets and problems. Betraying that trust by sharing their issues with others can damage your relationship with them.

Whatever happens in the family, stays in the family. It’s always best to respect everyone’s privacy and handle any issues internally.

8) Your future plans

I’ve always been a planner, someone who likes to have everything figured out. But what I’ve learned from experience is that sharing your future plans with everyone isn’t always beneficial.

Sometimes, sharing your plans can lead to unsolicited advice or even negativity which can be discouraging. Moreover, plans can change and when they do, having to explain why can be uncomfortable.

So my friend, it’s often best to keep your future plans under wraps. Share them with a select few who you trust and who you know will support you, no matter what.

9) Your passwords and security details

This one might seem obvious, yet it needs to be said. Never, ever share your passwords, PIN numbers, or other security details with anyone. This includes your closest friends, family members or even your significant other.

These details are designed to protect your privacy and secure your personal information.

Sharing them can put you at risk of fraud, identity theft, and other serious consequences. No matter how much you trust someone, keep this information strictly to yourself.

Food for thought: It all comes down to boundaries

Navigating the line between sharing and oversharing is a delicate process. It’s an art that requires understanding, self-awareness, and respect for yourself and others.

The journey towards maintaining healthier boundaries isn’t always an easy one. Yet, it’s a necessary step towards building stronger relationships and fostering self-respect.

In my book, “The Art of Resilience: A Practical Guide to Developing Mental Toughness”, I delve deeper into how we can cultivate resilience in our lives. This resilience often begins with setting firm personal boundaries.

So, as you navigate through your interactions with others, bear in mind: you hold the power in deciding what parts of your life you choose to share and what parts you wish to keep to yourself. After all, there’s a certain beauty in mystery, isn’t there?