When you try to walk away from a narcissist, it rarely ends quietly.

Instead of respecting boundaries or letting things be, they often lash out, intensifying their behaviors to stay relevant in your life.

From manipulation to outright hostility, narcissists have a way of turning a breakup or separation into an all-consuming ordeal.

This article explores 7 common tactics narcissists use when they sense their control slipping, helping you prepare for what may come next and stand firm in your decision.

Recognizing these behaviors can empower you to protect your peace and navigate this challenging process with clarity and confidence.

1) They’ll launch a charm offensive

In the narcissist’s playbook, the first move is often to turn on the charm.

When a narcissist senses they’re losing control, they’ll pull out all the stops to reel you back in.

This could be through flattery, grand gestures, or playing on shared memories.

It’s like they suddenly become the person you wished they were all along.

But don’t be fooled; this is simply a tactic to regain control and keep you in their sphere of influence.

Narcissists are skilled manipulators.

They know how to play on your emotions and use your past against you.

2) They’ll make you feel guilty

When I decided to distance myself from a narcissistic friend, she quickly played the victim card.

She reminded me of all the times she was there for me when I was down, and how she always had my back.

She even recounted instances that I barely remembered, painting them in a light that made it seem like I owed her for her kindness.

The guilt was overwhelming. It made me question whether I was doing the right thing.

But then I remembered, friendship isn’t about keeping score.

It’s not about owing and being owed—her actions were manipulative, not friendly.

So when the guilt trips start, remind yourself that you don’t owe anyone for basic human decency. 

3) They’ll try to isolate you from others

Narcissists like to keep their victims close and isolated—it gives them more control.

They might start spreading rumors about you, trying to damage your relationships with others.

Did you know that isolation is a common tactic in abusive relationships?

It’s employed to make the victim more dependent on the abuser, thus giving the abuser more control.

When you cut ties with a narcissist, they might accelerate this behavior in an attempt to make you feel alone and unwanted by others.

These are just tactics designed to keep you under their influence.

Stick to your decision and lean on your support network during this time.

4) They’ll play the blame game

When cornered, narcissists go on the offensive.

They refuse to accept that they could be at fault for anything, so they’ll find ways to blame you for the situation.

You’ll hear phrases like “You’re too sensitive,” or “You’re overreacting,” or my personal favorite, “You’re making a big deal out of nothing.”

These are all classic deflection techniques.

The goal is to make you second-guess yourself and your decision.

Don’t fall for it; stand firm in your decision and know that you’re not responsible for their behavior, they are.

5) They’ll send out their flying monkeys

That’s a phrase I picked up during my own ordeal.

In the narcissist’s world, “flying monkeys” are the people they manipulate into doing their bidding.

When I cut ties with my narcissistic ex, he sent our mutual friends to convince me to give him another chance.

He painted himself as the victim, and they believed him.

Suddenly, I was the bad guy!

These “flying monkeys” can make your decision to cut ties even harder.

But you know what? You don’t have to justify your decisions to anyone.

Your mental health matters, and if someone doesn’t respect your decision, it might be time to reconsider that relationship too.

6) They’ll act like nothing happened

One of the most bewildering tactics a narcissist might employ is to act like nothing happened.

They might go about their life as if everything is normal, even reaching out to you casually.

This is another manipulation strategy aimed at making you second guess your decision.

You might start wondering if you overreacted or if things were really as bad as you thought.

But trust your instincts—if you felt the need to cut ties, chances are it was for a good reason!

7) They’ll resort to aggression

When all else fails, narcissists might resort to aggression.

They could become verbally or even physically abusive.

Their insults and threats are designed to intimidate you into submission.

This is the most dangerous phase, and it’s crucial to protect yourself.

Make sure you have a support system in place and don’t hesitate to involve authorities if you feel threatened. 

Final thoughts

In conclusion, the behaviors of narcissists when faced with rejection are often predictable and rooted in manipulation.

From guilt trips to aggression, their tactics are designed to maintain control and keep you in their orbit.

It’s crucial to stand firm in your decision to cut ties and keep in mind that your well-being is a priority.

Surrounding yourself with supportive individuals and trusting your instincts can help you through this difficult time.

After all, breaking free from a narcissistic relationship is a courageous step toward a healthier and more fulfilling life.