Understanding the complexities of attraction can feel like navigating a labyrinth with no exit in sight.

This is especially true when someone is playing hard to get. 

Hi there, I’m Tina Fey, your guide through the maze of love and the founder of the Love Connection blog. Over the years, I’ve become somewhat of an expert in spotting those subtle signs that suggest someone is really into you, even if they’re playing it cool.

Today, we’ll explore seven not-so-obvious signs that someone is truly attracted to you but is playing hard to get.

Let’s get started. 

1) They find reasons to be around you

Attraction can be a tricky game, especially when someone is playing hard to get. But one thing is pretty clear: if someone is really into you, they’ll seize any opportunity to be around you.

The truth is we gravitate towards what we desire, even if we’re trying to keep it under wraps. So, if you notice that someone seems to be around you more often than not, it’s a good indicator that they’re attracted to you.

Perhaps they try to schedule meetings at work that aren’t strictly necessary or they always seem to be at the same social events as you. Or maybe they just happen to “bump into you” at your favorite coffee shop or gym.

These may not be coincidences but subtle signs that someone is attracted to you but is playing hard to get. It’s their way of being near you without seeming too eager.

Remember, though, context is key here. If you’re running into them often in a professional capacity or in social situations that involve mutual friends, it may not mean anything. But if it’s happening more often than not in different contexts – well, you might have a secret admirer on your hands!

2) Their body language speaks volumes

They say actions speak louder than words, and when it comes to attraction, this couldn’t be more accurate. As a relationship expert, I’ve learned that body language often reveals what someone is truly feeling, even if they’re trying to hide it.

Take a moment to observe the person in question. Do they make frequent eye contact with you? Do they lean in when you’re talking, or maybe even mirror your actions? These are all subtle signals that they’re attracted to you.

If their body language is showing you signs of attraction, believe it. They might be playing hard to get, but their body is telling you the truth.

3) They tease you more than others

Ah, good old-fashioned teasing. It’s one of the oldest tricks in the book when it comes to showing affection, and it doesn’t stop after our playground years. 

Teasing is a playful way to grab your attention, create a connection, and spark a bit of friendly banter. It’s also a way for someone to hide their true feelings behind a mask of playful jabs.

In my book, Breaking The Attachment: How To Overcome Codependency in Your Relationship, I delve into the complexities of romantic relationships and how teasing can often be a protective mechanism to avoid vulnerability.

But for now just know that if you find yourself on the receiving end of more jokes and playful jabs than usual from this person, don’t just brush it off as mere friendliness. You might just be on their radar.

Keep in mind, though, that the teasing should always be light-hearted and respectful. If it crosses the line into mean-spirited, that’s another story entirely.

4) They seem indifferent or aloof

Now, this might sound counterintuitive, but stick with me. Sometimes, when someone is really attracted to you, they might act indifferent or aloof.

Why?

Well, it’s their way of protecting themselves from the vulnerability that comes with expressing their feelings. It’s as if by acting uninterested, they believe they can keep their emotions in check.

If the person you suspect is attracted to you is typically outgoing and friendly but acts distant or detached around you, it’s possible they’re wrestling with their feelings. This is especially true if they’re known to play hard to get.

This behavior can be confusing and frustrating, I know. But people often act in unexpected ways when they’re navigating the complex realm of attraction. 

5) They remember the small details

Another thing I’ve learned from my years of studying human behavior and relationships is that when someone is attracted to you, they pay attention to the small details.

It can be as simple as remembering your favorite coffee order, asking about that project you mentioned last week, or even noting a subtle change in your outfit. These may seem insignificant, but they clearly show that this person is taking an interest in your life.

When someone plays hard to get, they might not express their feelings directly. But their keen attention to detail can still be a telltale sign of their attraction. It’s their way of showing they care without explicitly saying so.

6) They’re hot and cold

One moment they’re all over you, showering you with attention, and the next moment they’re distant and detached. Sound familiar?

I know, it’s like a rollercoaster ride that leaves you feeling confused and maybe even a little frustrated. 

However, this push-and-pull dynamic is a classic sign of someone who’s attracted to you but is trying to maintain control of their feelings. It’s their way of keeping you interested without revealing too much of their vulnerability.

As raw and honest as it sounds, attraction isn’t always straightforward. It comes with its fair share of complexities and contradictions. 

7) They’re protective of you

Last but definitely not least, I’ve observed that when someone is attracted to you, they instinctively become more protective. How would this look?

Well, they might defend your ideas in a group discussion, offer to walk you home at night or show concern when you’re not feeling well.

This protective nature often surfaces even when someone is playing hard to get. It’s a primal instinct that shows they care about your well-being, even if they’re not ready to admit their feelings just yet.

So next time this person shows a protective streak, take it as a subtle sign of their attraction. They might be playing hard to get, but their actions are speaking louder than words.

The bottom line 

Navigating the realm of attraction can be a rollercoaster ride, especially when someone is playing hard to get. But by keeping an eye out for these subtle signs, you can start to decode their behavior and understand their true feelings.

Remember, it’s all about paying attention to the details – their body language, their actions, and even their reactions. And most importantly, trust your instinct. It’s usually right.

If you’re interested in exploring more about relationships and the dynamics within them, I invite you to check out my book, Breaking The Attachment: How To Overcome Codependency in Your Relationship. Here, I delve deeper into how we can better understand and navigate our relationships.

Here’s to understanding attraction and making sense of the game of love. After all, love is a journey, not a destination!