7 subtle signs someone is a really positive influence in your life
They say you’re the average of the five people you spend the most time with, and honestly, there’s some truth to that.
The people we surround ourselves with have a massive impact on our lives—whether we realize it or not. They shape our mindset, influence our habits, and even affect how we view ourselves and the world around us.
But here’s the thing: not all positive influences come with flashing neon signs.
Sometimes, it’s the subtle ways someone lifts you up or supports you that make all the difference.
If you’ve ever wondered whether someone in your life is quietly helping you become the best version of yourself, here are seven subtle signs they’re a truly positive influence.
1) They encourage your growth
The first sign of someone being a positive influence in your life is their commitment to your personal growth.
We all have those people in our lives who are not just happy for our successes, but actively encourage us to reach out for more. They are the ones who see our potential even when we are unsure of ourselves.
They might gently nudge us out of our comfort zones, encouraging us to try something new or take on a challenge we’re hesitant about.
Or they could be the ones who offer constructive criticism, not to pull us down, but to help us improve and grow.
These individuals are genuinely invested in our growth and happiness. And their influence often acts as a catalyst, propelling us towards becoming better versions of ourselves.
This is what makes them such a positive influence. They don’t just add value to our lives; they help us discover the value within ourselves.
2) They inspire you with their actions
Another subtle sign of a positive influence is when someone’s actions inspire you to be better.
They don’t even have to say anything; their behavior and attitude towards life become a living example for you to follow.
For instance, I have a friend who’s incredibly dedicated to her fitness regime. Rain or shine, she never misses her morning run.
Initially, I’d look at her dedication in awe, but over time, her commitment rubbed off on me. I realized that if she could make time for fitness despite her busy schedule, then I could too.
Her influence wasn’t overt; she didn’t directly tell me to follow her routine. However, the way she prioritized her health inspired me to do the same.
As the folks at Access Psych say, “Positive role models influence our actions, often in the form of imitation, and motivate us to try for the standards they have set.”
So, when someone’s actions motivate you to improve and grow as a person, that’s a sure sign they’re a positive influence in your life.
3) They make you feel positive
The people who positively influence our lives have an uncanny ability to uplift our spirits. Even in challenging times, they manage to find the silver lining and help us see it too.
Studies have long established that emotions can be contagious. It makes sense, then, that when we spend time with people who are inherently positive, their emotions rub off on us.
We begin to view the world through a more optimistic lens.
So, if you notice that you feel happier, more optimistic, or more positive after spending time with someone, it’s likely that they’re a beneficial influence in your life.
They help you foster a positive mindset, which is key to overcoming challenges and achieving your goals.
4) They embody mindfulness
One key aspect of a positive influence is their ability to be fully present in the moment. They don’t dwell on the past or excessively worry about the future; instead, they focus on the here and now.
This mindfulness is a fundamental concept in Buddhism. It’s about being aware of our thoughts, feelings, and actions without judgment or distraction.
In my book “Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego,” I delve deeper into this concept and how it can significantly improve our lives.
You’ll discover how mindfulness, as well as the other teachings of Buddhism, can guide us toward living each moment to its fullest, teaching us to appreciate the beauty of now.
So, if someone in your life embodies this principle of mindfulness, make sure they stay in your life.
Their presence encourages you to slow down, breathe, and fully engage with your surroundings – a priceless gift in today’s fast-paced world.
5) They’re there in times of need
Several years ago, I went through a difficult period in my life. Everything seemed to be falling apart, and I was overwhelmed with feelings of despair and uncertainty.
But amidst this chaos, one person remained a constant source of comfort. They patiently listened to my fears, offered words of encouragement, and reassured me that things would get better.
Their support didn’t magically fix my problems, but it gave me the strength to keep going.
All that to say, if you have someone who sticks by you during your darkest hours, offering comfort and support without judgment, consider yourself lucky.
They’re undoubtedly a positive influence, helping you navigate life’s storms with resilience and courage.
6) They challenge you
Now, this one might seem a bit counter-intuitive. After all, don’t we usually associate positive influences with support and encouragement, as we’ve just discussed?
But here’s the thing: a truly positive influence in your life is one who wants you to grow as a person. And in that light, they aren’t afraid to challenge you.
They’ll question your decisions, not to doubt you, but to push you to think deeper.
They aren’t afraid to disagree with you when they believe you’re going astray. They might even confront you about unhealthy habits or choices.
While these interactions might be uncomfortable, they are crucial for our growth. They force us to question our beliefs, reassess our choices, and strive for improvement.
As the old saying goes, iron sharpens iron. And sometimes, it’s the people who challenge us the most who inspire us to become the best versions of ourselves.
7) They accept you, flaws and all
Perhaps the most crucial sign of a positive influence is unconditional acceptance.
These people don’t just tolerate your quirks and flaws; they embrace them. They understand that nobody’s perfect, and they value you for who you are, not who they want you to be.
This acceptance provides a safe space for you to be yourself without fear of judgment or criticism. It fosters a sense of belonging and reaffirms your worth.
We all need this kind of person in our lives. They remind us that we’re worthy of love and respect exactly as we are, and that’s a gift no one should take for granted.
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