Ever heard of the phrase, “fake it till you make it”?

I have, and boy, have I tried to live by it.

But, let me tell you something.

There are times when no matter how much you try to project confidence and self-assurance, your subconscious behaviors can give away your underlying feelings of low self-worth.

Here’s the deal.

Without even realizing it, you might be exhibiting subtle behaviors that scream, “I don’t value myself enough!”

Surprised? You might want to stick around.

In this article, we’ll delve into seven subtle behaviors that could be revealing your lack of self-worth without you even knowing it.

So, if you’ve been wondering why people treat you a certain way or why you’re not getting the respect you deserve, this could be an enlightening read for you.

Remember, self-awareness is the first step to growth and improvement. So, let’s get started.

1) You’re constantly over-apologizing

Ever found yourself saying “sorry” more times than you can count?

Now, don’t get me wrong. Apologizing when you’ve done something wrong is a sign of maturity and respect for other’s feelings.

But here’s the catch.

If you’re saying “sorry” even when it’s not needed, it might be a red flag.

Over-apologizing can indicate a lack of self-worth.

It’s as if you’re constantly walking on eggshells, not wanting to upset anyone, and feeling like you’re always in the wrong.

And guess what?

People can pick up on this. They sense the lack of self-confidence and take it as a measure of your self-worth.

Then, next time you find yourself about to say “sorry” for no reason, pause.

Consider if an apology is really necessary or if it’s your low self-esteem talking.

2) You’re always downplaying your achievements

This one hits close to home. I used to be the queen of downplaying my successes.

I remember when I got my first promotion.

Instead of celebrating, I found myself saying, “Oh, it’s not a big deal. Anyone could have done it.” I was belittling my own achievement.

Sound familiar?

Downplaying your accomplishments is a classic sign you’re undervaluing yourself.

It shows a belief that you’re not worthy of praise or recognition, and that can reflect a lack of self-worth.

The truth is, every achievement, big or small, is worth celebrating. You worked hard for it, and you deserve the recognition.

So next time you achieve something, own it! Give yourself the credit you rightfully earned.

Remember, acknowledging your accomplishments doesn’t make you arrogant—it just means you know your worth.

3) You settle for less than you deserve

Here’s a hard pill to swallow: You accept the love you think you deserve.

Let that sink in.

When it comes to relationships, jobs, or just about anything in life, if you’re constantly settling for less than what you truly deserve, it’s high time to question why.

Are you convinced you’re not good enough for a better job? Are you accepting less respect and love than you should in your relationships?

If your answer is yes, it’s a behavior stemming from a lack of self-worth.

You see, when you don’t value yourself enough, it’s hard to believe others will.

Thus, unconsciously, you lower your standards. You accept less than what you deserve because deep down, you don’t believe you deserve more.

It’s a vicious cycle.

The first step to break this cycle is to recognize this behavior. Then, start believing in your worth.

Trust me, the moment you start doing this, you’ll see a world of difference in the way people treat you and the opportunities that come your way.

4) You’re a people-pleaser

 

There’s a thin line between being kind and being a people-pleaser.

Being kind comes from a place of love, while people-pleasing originates from fear.

Fear of rejection, fear of conflict, or simply, fear of not being liked.

Here’s what I’ve come to understand.

If you find yourself always bending over backwards to please others, even at the cost of your own happiness or well-being, it’s likely you’re struggling with self-worth.

Why?

Because you’re seeking validation and acceptance from others, instead of finding it within yourself. You’re letting others determine your worth.

The reality?

You can’t please everyone. And you don’t have to.

Your worth isn’t dependent on what others think of you. It’s about what you think of yourself.

Next time you find yourself going out of your way to please someone else, ask yourself: “Am I doing this because I genuinely want to, or because I’m seeking validation?”

Remember, it’s okay to say no sometimes. It doesn’t make you any less valuable or lovable.

5) You rarely express your opinions

Did you know that elephants, despite their gigantic size, can be restrained by a simple rope tied to their leg?

This happens because when they’re young and much smaller, they’re tied with the same rope.

Despite their attempts, they can’t break free. As they grow up, they continue to believe they can’t break the rope, so they don’t even try.

This might seem unrelated, but stick with me here.

Just like the elephants, we too can fall victim to learned helplessness.

If you’ve constantly been shot down when expressing your views or opinions in the past, you might stop sharing them altogether.

But here’s the thing.

If you rarely express your opinions or stay silent even when you disagree with something, it’s a sign that you’re undervaluing your thoughts and ideas.

This stems from a lack of self-worth.

Your voice matters. Your opinions matter. And they deserve to be heard.

Whenever you hesitate before speaking up, remember the elephant and the rope.

Don’t let past experiences hold you back from expressing your thoughts today. Break free!

6) You’re excessively self-critical

We all have that little voice inside our heads. For some, it’s a cheerleader, for others, it’s a critic.

If your inner voice is constantly pointing out your flaws, berating you for your mistakes, and never acknowledging your strengths, it’s time for a heart-to-heart chat with yourself.

Being excessively self-critical is like pouring salt on your own wounds. It’s a subtle behavior that reflects a lack of self-worth.

Listen, no one is perfect. We all make mistakes.

It’s part of being human. So why should you be any different?

Instead of beating yourself up over every misstep, use it as a learning opportunity. Embrace your flaws. They make you unique.

Remember, you’re doing the best you can with what you have, and that’s more than enough.

Be kind to yourself because you deserve it.

7) You avoid self-care

If you’re constantly putting others before yourself and neglecting your own needs, it’s more than just being selfless. This could be a sign of low self-worth.

You see, self-care isn’t selfish. It’s necessary.

When you neglect your own physical, emotional, and mental well-being, it sends a message that you don’t value yourself enough to take care of your own needs.

Self-care is essential not just for your health, but also for your self-esteem. It’s a way of telling yourself and the world that you matter.

So treat yourself with the same love, kindness, and respect you give to others. You’re worth it!

In conclusion

Recognizing yourself in these behaviors can be a bit disheartening, I know.

But here’s the silver lining: Awareness is the first step towards change.

If you can spot these subtle signs of low self-worth, you’re already on the path to boosting your self-esteem.

It won’t happen overnight, but it’s completely within your power to change these behaviors.

Start by challenging your negative self-talk. Celebrate your achievements. Make room for self-care in your routine.

Speak up and express your opinions confidently. Remember, your voice matters.

The journey towards self-worth is a personal one.

It’s not about people-pleasing or meeting societal standards. It’s about embracing who you are, flaws and all.

As Carl Rogers once said, “The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.” Take a moment to reflect on that.

So be patient with yourself.

Give yourself the compassion you extend to others. Remember, you’re worthy just as you are.