9 situations in life where a person’s true colors always come out, according to psychology

Lucas Graham by Lucas Graham | September 12, 2024, 10:45 am

In the heat of conflict, when emotions are running high, people often reveal their true nature.

It’s in these moments of disagreement that we see how individuals handle stress, frustration, and opposition.

Whether they react with patience or aggression, their true colors emerge, shedding light on their genuine character.

1) During conflict

Conflicts, arguments, and disagreements are a part of life. They’re inevitable. But it’s how we handle these moments that truly reflect our character.

Conflict is indeed a prime situation where a person’s true colors emerge. It’s easy to stay composed and act kindly when everything is smooth sailing. But when the waters get choppy? That’s a different story entirely.

How does a person react during a heated argument? Do they stay calm and rational, or do they resort to personal attacks and shouting? Do they listen and try to understand the other side, or do they only care about proving their point?

Observing someone in conflict can provide deep insights into their character. And it’s not just about how they handle the disagreement, but also how they act when the dust settles.

2) When they are under pressure

Pressure situations are another revealing moment. They test our mental strength, resilience, and patience.

I remember a time when I was working on a time-sensitive project at work. The deadline was approaching and tension was high within the team. One of my colleagues, who usually appeared calm and collected, started to unravel.

He snapped at minor mistakes, blamed others for delays, and was generally unpleasant to work with. It was a side of him that none of us had seen before.

It wasn’t a one-off incident either. In subsequent pressure situations, the same traits reappeared.

Under pressure, our calm facade can slip, revealing who we truly are. It’s not about being perfect under stress – after all, we’re only human – but it’s about how we deal with that stress.

Do we buckle under the strain or rise to the occasion? And how do we treat others when our patience is tested?

3) When they face failure

Failure is a part of life. It’s often said that it’s not about how many times we fall, but how many times we get back up. And there’s a lot of truth in that.

How a person reacts to failure can speak volumes about their character. Do they throw in the towel at the first sign of defeat?

Or do they take it in stride, learn from their mistakes, and use the experience as a stepping stone towards success?

Failure can be crushing, but it also gives us an opportunity to show resilience and tenacity. 

4) When they are in a position of power

Power can be a tricky thing. It can bring out the best in some, and the worst in others.

When individuals find themselves in a position of power, they are granted the ability to influence others and make significant decisions. This newfound authority can reveal their true nature.

Do they use their power to uplift and support others? Or do they misuse it to belittle and control? Are they fair and considerate, or do they favor certain people while undermining others?

Remember the saying, “Absolute power corrupts absolutely.” Power doesn’t change people, it unmasks them. It reveals who they truly are when given authority over others. 

American professor Dacher Keltner argues that “True power requires modesty and empathy, not force and coercion.”

5) When they believe nobody is watching

It’s easy to put on a good show when we know others are watching. But what happens when we think no one is looking?

A person’s actions when they believe they’re alone can be quite revealing. Do they still stick to their principles, or do they bend the rules? Do they treat others with respect, or do they become dismissive and rude?

Who you are when no one is looking is who you really are.

6) When they face a personal loss

Experiencing loss is one of the hardest things we go through in life. About 2.5 million people die in the United States each year, leaving an average of five grieving people behind.

Grief can be all-consuming, and it’s during these times that a person’s true colors may surface.

we don’t need research to tell us that loss can make some people bitter and resentful, while it can make others more compassionate and understanding. It’s a test of strength, resilience, and how we handle our emotions.

How does a person navigate through their grief? Do they use it as an opportunity to grow, or do they let it pull them down?

Do they reach out for support, or do they push people away? Each of these responses can tell us something about their character.

In the face of personal loss, we see the raw, unfiltered version of a person. 

7) When they have to make a tough decision

Tough decisions are a part of life. They demand courage, wisdom, and sometimes, a willingness to take risks.

I recall a time in my life when I had to choose between a secure job and pursuing a passion project.

It was a tough call. The security of a steady paycheck was comforting, but my heart was pulling me towards the unknown.

In the end, I chose to follow my passion. Some called it brave, others called it foolish.

But it was a decision that revealed my true character – not just to others, but to myself as well.

Tough decisions can be turning points in our lives. They push us out of our comfort zones and force us to confront our fears and insecurities

8) When they deal with someone from a different background

We live in a diverse world filled with people of different races, religions, cultures, and backgrounds.

Interacting with someone whose experiences and perspectives are different from ours can be both enlightening and challenging.

Empathy and respect are hallmarks of a truly great character. The way we treat others, especially those who are different from us, can reveal much about our true selves. 

9) When they are asked to help

The willingness to help others, particularly when there’s no personal gain involved, can be a clear indicator of a person’s true colors.

Are they willing to lend a hand to someone in need? Or do they only offer assistance when it benefits them? 

Helping others isn’t about grand gestures or heroic acts. It’s about kindness, empathy, and the willingness to make someone else’s life a bit easier. 

Final thoughts

The famous psychiatrist Carl Jung once said, “You are what you do, not what you say you’ll do.” Our actions, particularly in challenging times, speak louder than our words ever can.