7 signs you’re not “too sensitive,” you’re just dealing with a high-level gaslighter

Tina Fey by Tina Fey | September 18, 2024, 1:54 pm

Ever been told you’re “too sensitive” or that you “overreact” when you’re simply expressing how you feel? Yeah, it stings, doesn’t it?

But here’s the thing—sometimes it’s not about being overly sensitive.

It could be that you’re up against a high-level gaslighter. These individuals have a way of making you question your own reality, leaving you doubting your every reaction.

As a relationship expert, I’m here to break it down for you. Today, we’re going to explore seven signs that prove you’re not the problem—you’re just dealing with someone who’s expertly twisting the truth.

Let’s dive in.

1) You’re always apologizing

Do you find yourself constantly saying sorry, even for the smallest things that aren’t your fault?

As widely noted by experts like those at Very Well Mind, blame-shifting is a common sign of being gaslighted.

High-level gaslighters have a knack for making you feel like you’re always in the wrong. They are skilled manipulators that can make you question your own actions and even your sanity, pushing you into a state of constant apologizing.

But here’s the reality – not everything that goes wrong is your fault. You have to understand that everyone makes mistakes, including them. And it’s okay to remind them of this fact.

Next time you find yourself on the verge of apologizing, take a step back and assess the situation. Are you really at fault? 

2) You’re doubting your own memories

Are your memories being constantly challenged or dismissed by this person? Are they making you believe that events didn’t happen the way you remember them?

This is another classic sign of high-level gaslighting. 

I’ve seen this happen in many relationships over the years, and it can be incredibly disorienting.

Gaslighters will often deny events or conversations happened or twist them to suit their narrative. This tactic is designed to make you doubt your own perception and memory.

Here are a few tips to deal with this:

  • Document important events or conversations: Keep notes or text records to remind yourself of what actually happened.
  • Trust your intuition: If something feels off or confusing, it’s likely because you’re being manipulated.
  • Talk to someone you trust: Discuss the situation with a close friend or therapist to gain a clearer perspective.

3) You’ve lost your self-confidence

Self-confidence is something I’ve always struggled with in my younger years.

But one thing I’ve learned is that in a healthy relationship, your partner should build you up, not tear you down.

If you find that your self-confidence has taken a nosedive since this person entered your life, it’s a glaring sign that there is something amiss. 

And it may be because you are dealing with a gaslighter. These individuals often belittle and criticize their victims to make them feel worthless and dependent on them.

4) You feel like you’re “going crazy”

Here’s something you might not expect –  as noted by experts like those at WebMD, feeling like you’re losing your mind could actually be a sign that you’re dealing with a high-level gaslighter.

You see, gaslighters have a knack for making you question your reality.

They’ll deny saying things they’ve clearly said, or they’ll accuse you of misunderstanding them. They might even dismiss your feelings as being overblown or irrational.

These tactics can leave you feeling confused and disoriented, like you’re “going crazy”.

5) You’re emotionally exhausted

Dealing with a high-level gaslighter is like being on a never-ending emotional rollercoaster. It’s draining, it’s disorienting, and it’s downright exhausting.

If you’re constantly feeling emotionally spent, it’s a clear red flag.

Gaslighters feed off this exhaustion – it makes you easier to manipulate and control. They will keep you on your toes with unpredictable mood swings and outbursts, leaving you in a constant state of stress and anxiety.

Relationships should provide comfort and happiness, not leave you feeling drained and defeated. You deserve better. Don’t let them rob you of your emotional strength.

6) They make you feel guilty for having boundaries

Do you find that every time you try to set a boundary, they make you feel like you’re being unreasonable or selfish?

This is another classic gaslighting tactic.

These manipulators don’t respect boundaries because boundaries limit their control. They’ll twist the situation to make you feel guilty for standing up for yourself, convincing you that your needs are a burden, or that you’re being difficult.

But here’s the truth: healthy relationships thrive on mutual respect, and your boundaries are valid. You have every right to set limits that protect your well-being, and anyone who tries to make you feel guilty for that is not respecting you.

Stay firm in what feels right for you, and don’t let them blur those lines.

7) You feel isolated from loved ones

This is a serious one.

If you’ve noticed that you’re drifting away from friends or family, it could be because a gaslighter is intentionally creating distance.

Gaslighters often isolate their victims from loved ones, knowing that having support makes you harder to control. They might criticize your closest relationships, plant seeds of doubt, or even create conflicts that make it harder for you to stay connected.

Isolation is a powerful tactic—it leaves you feeling alone, making it easier for them to manipulate your thoughts and emotions.

If this is happening, it’s time to reach out to your support system and reclaim those connections. The people who love you will always want to lift you up, not tear you away.

Final thoughts

Recognizing that you’re dealing with a high-level gaslighter is the first step towards breaking free from their manipulative grip.

It’s not an easy journey, but it’s one worth taking for your mental and emotional well-being.

Remember, you’re not “too sensitive” or “going crazy” – you’re just dealing with someone who knows how to manipulate your feelings. Trust yourself, stand up for your truth, and don’t let anyone make you question your worth.

Stay strong. You’ve got this.

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