There’s a difference, you know, between being head over heels in love and being in a balanced, mutual relationship.

It comes down to reciprocity. Being in love is beautiful, but it can be painful if the feelings aren’t returned in the same measure.

Stay tuned to dive into  nine signs that might help you understand your relationship better.

1) You’re always the initiator

We all know it takes two to tango, right?

But when it comes to your relationship, are you always the one leading the dance?

If you’re constantly the one initiating contact, planning dates, or even starting conversations, it might be a sign that your feelings are deeper than theirs.

In a balanced relationship, both partners should be active participants. However, when you’re always the one making the effort to keep the connection alive, it’s time for some soul-searching.

Don’t panic, though. It could just be a communication style difference.

However, it’s still worth discussing with your partner to ensure both of you are on the same page.

2) Their happiness is your priority

I remember being in a relationship once where I constantly put my partner’s needs and happiness above mine.

It was like I was living to make them happy. When they were happy, I was ecstatic. But when they were upset, it felt like my world was falling apart.

Every decision I made, every plan I set, revolved around them. It was as if my happiness was tied to theirs – and that’s an imbalance.

In a healthy relationship, both partners should care equally about each other’s happiness. Therefore, don’t forget that your happiness matters too.

3) You overlook their flaws

Did you know that according to studies, when we’re in love, our brains release a cocktail of chemicals that make us overlook the flaws of our loved ones?

It’s like nature’s rose-colored glasses.

This might sound romantic, but if you find yourself constantly making excuses for your partner’s behavior or overlooking their faults while they have no problem pointing out yours, it could be a sign.

 Love should never blind you to the point of imbalance in a relationship.

4) You remember every detail about them

Does your partner’s favorite color, their first pet’s name, or their childhood best friend’s name come readily to your mind?

You’re not alone. When we deeply love someone, our brain tends to store every little detail about them.

In contrast, your partner struggles to remember even significant details about you while you remember everything about them. This might suggest an imbalance.

In a balanced relationship, both partners show interest in each other’s lives and remember important details.

5) You’re always available for them

 While availability is key in any relationship, it’s important to ensure it’s not at the expense of your own needs.

Constantly rearranging your schedule or sacrificing your own plans to accommodate your partner, while they fail to reciprocate, could indicate a sign of imbalance in the relationship.

A mutual relationship is about both partners being there for each other, not just one person always being on call. 

6) You fear losing them more than they fear losing you

Love is beautiful, but it can also make us vulnerable. The fear of losing someone we deeply love can be overwhelming.

What’s important to remember is that this fear should be mutual in a balanced relationship.

If you find yourself constantly worrying about losing your partner, constantly seeking reassurances, while they seem indifferent or nonchalant about the idea of losing you, it might be a sign that your feelings run deeper.

At the end of the day, true love is not just about cherishing someone, but also about being cherished in return. It’s about knowing that the fear of loss is as real for them as it is for you.

7) You feel insecure about their feelings for you

There was a time when I found myself constantly questioning my partner’s feelings. I would find myself asking, “Do they love me as much as I love them?”

This insecurity stemmed from the uncertainty of their feelings towards me. It felt like I was walking on eggshells, afraid that any wrong move could drive them away.

So in a situation where you’re constantly feeling insecure or uncertain about your partner’s feelings, it might indicate that you’re more in love.

In a secure, balanced relationship, both partners are confident about each other’s feelings and don’t have to constantly question or doubt them.

8) You’re always trying to impress them

Aside from that, in a balanced relationship, there’s mutual admiration and respect.

You don’t need to constantly prove your worth or impress your partner. They love you for who you are, not just for what you do.

Bear in mind that when you’re always trying to impress them but they don’t seem to go out of their way to impress you, it could indicate that you’re more in love.

9) You’re more invested in the future of the relationship

The future of a relationship is something that both partners should equally be invested in.

If you find yourself constantly dreaming about and planning for a future together while your partner seems indifferent or unenthusiastic, it could be a sign that you’re more invested in the relationship.

 Your dreams and plans for the future should be a shared vision, not just a solo endeavor.

Small reminder: Love is a balance

The dance of love is delicate and often complex. It’s a balance, a give-and-take that should ideally be equal.

But life isn’t always ideal and sometimes, we may find ourselves giving more than we receive. And while it’s natural to want your feelings reciprocated in the same measure, remember, love is not a competition.

Dr. Gary Chapman, author of “The 5 Love Languages“, suggests that people express and understand love in different ways. Maybe your partner loves you just as much but expresses it differently.

So before jumping to conclusions, take a moment to reflect. Talk with your partner, express your feelings and concerns. Seek understanding before judgment.

In the end, what matters is not who loves more but how you grow together in love.

Because true love is not just about feeling loved, but also about feeling secure, appreciated, and valued in the relationship.