We often idealize the notion of a “perfect” relationship.

If our relationships don’t fit this mold of perfection, we find ourselves questioning whether they are as solid as they seem.

But here’s the thing: Real relationships, the truly healthy ones, aren’t always perfect. So instead of aiming for perfection, we should recognize the signs of a genuinely healthy relationship.

But how can you tell if your relationship is genuinely healthy?

In this article, we’ll uncover eight key signs that indicate you’re in a healthy relationship, despite its imperfections.

1) Authenticity over perfection

We often get caught up in the idea of a perfect relationship – one that looks flawless to the outside world, with endless laughter and never a cross word.

But in reality, the healthiest relationships are those that embrace authenticity over perfection.

In a healthy relationship, there’s no need to put on a facade or pretend to be someone you’re not.

You and your partner are able to express your genuine selves, in all your glorious imperfection. You’re able to share your thoughts, fears, and dreams without judgment or fear of rejection.

This doesn’t mean every moment is blissful or that disagreements don’t occur.

On the contrary, it’s about being comfortable with conflict and resolving it in a way that respects each other’s perspectives and feelings.

The key here is embracing authenticity. Even if your relationship isn’t picture-perfect, it’s the authenticity that represents its true health.

2) Communication is key

I’ve always been someone who values open and honest communication, and this belief extends to my relationships as well.

It’s not about having endless deep conversations or agreeing all the time. Instead, it’s about the ability to express your feelings, thoughts, and concerns freely.

In a healthy relationship, you should feel comfortable discussing everything from your fears and dreams to what’s bothering you at work or how you’re feeling about a certain situation.

In return, your partner listens, respects your feelings, and responds without judgment or defensiveness.

In short, a healthy relationship makes you feel heard, valued, and respected through effective communication.

3) Your relationship reflects your inner world

In my experience and through working with the shaman Rudá Iandê, I’ve learned that our external relationships often mirror our internal relationship with ourselves.

This is a powerful realization because it places us firmly in the driver’s seat of our personal growth and the health of our relationships.

One of the most transformative parts of Rudá’s “The Art of Love and Intimacy” masterclass is the understanding that perfection is a myth. Instead, being present and embracing our current circumstances can drastically improve our relationships.

This free masterclass helps break down societal conditioning around love and intimacy. It encourages self-empowerment and emotional independence, helping you break free from toxic relationship cycles and limiting beliefs. 

The insights you’ll gain from this masterclass can empower you to transform your relationships and personal growth.

By recognizing that your relationships reflect your inner world, you can take proactive steps to improve both your internal and external connections.

4) Emotional independence is crucial

One of the rawest truths I’ve learned about healthy relationships is the importance of emotional independence.

It’s easy to fall into the trap of relying on your partner for your happiness. It feels good to be loved and wanted, but it’s unhealthy to place the responsibility of your emotional well-being onto someone else.

In a healthy relationship, you’re happy with who you are as an individual. You’re not using your partner as a way to escape from yourself or your life.

Instead, you’re choosing to share your life with them because it enriches your experiences, not because you need them to feel complete or happy.

This point directly ties into the idea that our relationships reflect our inner world, as covered in the previous section.

When we’re emotionally independent, we place ourselves in control of our happiness and personal development.

This leads to healthier relationships because we’re not looking for someone to fill a void or fix our problems. We’re looking for someone who complements us and enriches our life.

So, I invite you to ask yourself: Are you emotionally independent, or are you outsourcing your happiness to your partner?

5) Conflict is not a sign of failure

Contrary to what many believe, conflict in a relationship doesn’t signify failure or doom.

It’s natural for disagreements to arise when two unique individuals, with distinct thoughts and perspectives, come together.

The key lies not in avoiding conflict, but in how it’s resolved.

In a healthy relationship, conflicts serve as opportunities for growth and understanding.

They provide a platform for open communication and mutual respect. It’s not about who’s right or wrong, but about understanding each other’s perspectives and finding common ground.

Even amidst conflict, it’s crucial to maintain an atmosphere of respect and empathy. It’s about valuing your partner’s viewpoint as much as your own.

So remember: conflict isn’t a sign of failure, but an opportunity for growth. A relationship without conflict isn’t perfect—it’s stagnant.

6) Personal growth is encouraged

One of the most compelling signs of a healthy relationship is when personal growth is not just accepted but actively encouraged.

Research shows that we experience more relationship satisfaction when our partner acts as our cheerleaders, celebrating our successes and supporting us in our endeavors.

In a truly healthy relationship, there’s no room for jealousy or resentment over each other’s accomplishments.

Instead, you celebrate each other’s triumphs and encourage the pursuit of individual passions and interests. This isn’t about leading separate lives but about nurturing individuality within the collective.

This aligns with my belief in personal empowerment and the importance of supportive communities. It’s through our connections with others that we find the courage to pursue our dreams, overcome challenges, and experience shared joy.

7) Your values align

While it’s not necessary to agree on everything, sharing core values is vital for a healthy relationship.

These values form the foundation of your partnership, guiding your decisions and shaping your future together.

Whether it’s regarding financial choices, lifestyle preferences or moral beliefs, having aligned values eases potential conflicts and fosters mutual respect.

It ensures that you’re both working towards the same kind of life, even if you have different ways of getting there.

Having aligned values isn’t about perfection; it’s about unity in diversity and striving for the same fundamental goals.

8) There’s mutual respect

The final sign of a healthy relationship, even if it isn’t perfect, is mutual respect.

It may seem obvious, but its importance cannot be overstated. Respect forms the bedrock of any genuine connection.

In a healthy relationship, both partners appreciate each other as individuals. They:

• Respect each other’s boundaries
• Listen to each other’s opinions
• Value each other’s feelings

Respect isn’t just about how you treat your partner; it’s also about how they treat you. A relationship without mutual respect is not a healthy relationship.

Embracing the imperfections

No relationship is without its imperfections, but recognizing the signs of a healthy partnership can help you appreciate the strong foundation you’ve built together.

By acknowledging these eight positive indicators, you can celebrate the genuine love, respect, and support that define your connection.

For those interested in diving deeper into these principles and applying them to their personal relationships, I strongly recommend watching Rudá Iandê’s free “The Art of Love and Intimacy” masterclass.

The lessons within this masterclass align seamlessly with the signs of a healthy relationship we have discussed in this article.