7 signs you’re dealing with a low-key narcissist, according to psychology

Isabella Chase by Isabella Chase | November 12, 2024, 4:34 pm

Dealing with a narcissist can feel like a subtle mind game—after all, they don’t come with a sign saying, “Hey, I’m all about me!” Instead, there are hidden signs to watch for.

Psychology offers some clear indicators that you might be dealing with a low-key narcissist. These signs aren’t always as obvious as you might expect, but once you spot them, they can really change how you interact with this person.

Remember, this isn’t about labeling people but understanding their behavior to improve your interactions. So, let’s dive into seven signs you’re dealing with a low-key narcissist.

1) They turn the spotlight on themselves

Narcissism is often associated with a love for the limelight. But low-key narcissists have a subtler way of stealing the show.

Psychology shows us that these individuals have a knack for turning conversations and situations around to focus on themselves. They might not be shouting it from the rooftops, but they are silently steering the spotlight towards them.

Imagine you’re sharing a story about your recent vacation. Before long, they’ve taken over, sharing details about their own travel adventures.

Now, it’s not about one-upping your story—it’s about skillfully bringing attention back to themselves. This behavior can be easy to overlook, but once you recognize it, it becomes unmistakably clear.

2) They rarely exhibit empathy

From personal experience, I can tell you that another sign of a low-key narcissist is their lack of empathy. They find it difficult to truly understand or share the feelings of others.

Just last week, I had a rough day and confided in a friend about a disappointment at work. Instead of offering comfort or simply listening, he swiftly shifted the focus to his own achievements.

It wasn’t overtly dismissive, but the lack of empathy was clear. It’s not that they can’t grasp your feelings—they’re just more invested in their own.

This subtle behavior, once noticed, can reveal a lot: you might be dealing with a low-key narcissist.

3) They have a grandiose sense of self-importance

Low-key narcissists often harbor a deep-seated belief in their superiority, even if they don’t overtly express it. This sense of self-importance is a hallmark trait of narcissism.

Studies show that narcissists tend to exaggerate their abilities and accomplishments while diminishing those of others. Rather than overt bragging, they subtly imply their superiority through casual comments or dismissive remarks.

For example, they might casually mention how quickly they completed a task compared to colleagues, subtly suggesting greater efficiency and skill. This inflated self-view subtly colors their interactions, hinting at their narcissistic tendencies.

4) They constantly need validation

Narcissists may appear outwardly confident, but often they depend on external validation to bolster their self-esteem.

Low-key narcissists are no different. They seek praise and admiration to validate their inflated self-image, though not always overtly fishing for compliments. Instead, they subtly maneuver situations to elicit praise.

For instance, they might subtly emphasize their achievements in conversation or downplay their skills, hoping others will affirm their worth. This continual need for affirmation is a telltale sign of dealing with a low-key narcissist.

5) They’re experts at passive-aggressive behavior

There was a time when I often found myself feeling uneasy after interactions with a certain individual. It took me some time to realize why.

This person had a way of expressing their disapproval or dissatisfaction in an underhand manner. There were no direct confrontations, just subtle digs, disguised insults, and veiled criticisms that left me feeling uneasy.

Passive-aggressive behavior is a common trait among low-key narcissists, research shows. They might not openly belittle or demean you, but they have a knack for making you feel inferior through indirect jabs.

6) They have a sense of entitlement

A low-key narcissist may not openly demand special treatment, but they often operate with a hidden belief that they deserve it.

According to experts, this entitlement can manifest in various ways, from disregarding rules that apply to others to expecting unwarranted recognition and respect.

For example, they might consistently arrive late to meetings without acknowledging the inconvenience caused, subtly suggesting their time is more valuable. Alternatively, they may expect immediate responses to their messages, regardless of others’ schedules.

7) They struggle with genuine connections

Narcissism really messes with the ability to have real, deep connections with others, as per psychology.

You might know someone who seems to have tons of friends, but if you scratch the surface, those relationships often lack that genuine respect and depth.

For these low-key narcissists, relationships become more about what they can get out of them—boosting their own image or status—rather than truly caring about the other person’s feelings or needs.

It’s about understanding, not judgment

In essence, understanding these signs isn’t about hastily labeling individuals or passing judgment. It’s about gaining insights into the behaviors and tendencies of those around us.

Identifying a low-key narcissist doesn’t mean we should condemn or isolate them. Instead, it equips us with understanding to navigate interactions more effectively.

As you move forward, carry this understanding with you. Use it to navigate social dynamics, decipher interactions, and cultivate meaningful connections.