7 signs your partner genuinely appreciates having you in their life, according to psychology

Cat Harper by Cat Harper | May 27, 2024, 5:31 pm

We all want to feel valued and appreciated by our partners, right? 

After all, feeling cherished is a cornerstone of any great relationship. 

People show their appreciation in many different ways because, let’s face it, everyone is unique.

But if you’re wondering whether your partner truly values you and you’re looking for some solid signs, you’re in the right place. 

According to psychologists, there are specific behaviors that can indicate just how much someone appreciates having you in their life.

Ready to dive into the 7 key signs that your other half truly treasures your presence, all backed by expert insights?

Let’s jump in!

1) They make sacrifices for you

Relationships are smooth sailing when both you and your partner get what you want. 

But what about when sacrifices are needed? 

If your partner regularly puts your needs before their own, it’s a big sign of their appreciation.

John Gottman, psychologist and relationship expert, says “Successful long-term relationships are created through small words, small gestures, and small acts.” 

Turns out: those little sacrifices your partner makes are actually huge in showing how much they care about keeping you happy.

These sacrifices might look like giving up a night out to comfort you when you’re not feeling your best or choosing a holiday spot they know you’ll love, even if it’s not their top choice.

When your partner does things like these, they’re really showing they value and appreciate you. 

It’s these small acts of kindness that help build a strong and lasting relationship.

2) They really listen to you 

Another sign that your partner truly appreciates having you in their life is that they listen to you, I mean, they really listen. 

You might think being a good listener is simple, but it’s actually a big deal if your partner really pays attention to what you’re saying. 

When they’re truly listening your partner focuses completely on you, not just waiting for their turn to talk. 

They try to understand everything you’re saying, not just the words but the feelings behind them. 

Carl R. Rogers, a famous psychologist, says that deep listening is like letting your partner know:

“I’m interested in you as a person, and I think that what you feel is important. I’m not trying to change you or evaluate you. I just want to understand you. I think you’re worth listening to.”

So, if your partner truly listens to you, it shows they truly appreciate having you around. 

3) They thank you for everything you do, big or small

One clear sign your partner truly appreciates you is how often they say thank you. 

Whether you cook dinner, give them a ride, plan a date, or take out the trash, their constant gratitude shows they don’t take anything you do for granted.

Saying thanks does more than just show appreciation, it actually makes both of you feel more love and connection to each other. 

Research has shown that when your partner expresses gratitude, it releases the “love hormone” oxytocin, which makes you both feel closer and more bonded.

The great thing about gratitude is that it benefits both the giver and the receiver. 

Why not keep the good vibes going? 

Next time your partner does something nice, make sure to say thanks back. 

It strengthens your relationship and keeps you both feeling good so it’s a win-win. 

4) They understand how you like to be loved and love you that way

Have you heard about the five love languages

They’re just different ways people like to feel loved: through compliments, touch, doing things for each other, gifts, or spending time together.

It’s normal for people to show love in the way that feels easiest for them. 

But when your partner really pays attention to what makes you feel loved and does it your way, it’s a big deal.  

Not only does it show you that they truly appreciate having you in their life, but it also boosts relationship happiness for both of you. 

Think about it: Does your partner make an effort to love you how you prefer?

For instance, my partner isn’t into big public gestures, but he knows I love holding hands. 

So, he makes sure to do that when we’re out and about. It’s his way of showing he really appreciates me.

When your partner loves you the way you like, not just in the way that’s easy for them, it really shows they value and appreciate you. 

5) They respect your boundaries

When you think about the ways your partner shows they appreciate you, respecting your boundaries is a huge deal. 

Whether it’s giving you space after an argument, or avoiding things that make you uncomfortable, respecting your boundaries shows they truly care.

Psychologist Dr. Meghan Marcum explains it well, “People set boundaries to feel safe. When someone respects these, it builds trust and shows they care about how you feel.” 

This kind of respect is a big indicator that they appreciate having you in their life.

They want to keep you around so they prioritize your comfort and emotional well-being.

And honestly, what better way is there to show they appreciate you than by genuinely caring for your safety and well-being?

6) They include you in future plans

When your partner makes plans for the future and includes you, it’s a big sign they really value having you in their life. 

It could be planning your next vacation, talking about what your future home could look like, or even discussing events coming up in a few months. 

All of this shows they see a long-term future with you and are excited about it.

I remember the first time I heard my best friend talking about a wedding that was a year away. 

She casually said, “Matt and I will probably make a weekend of it.” 

She’d only just started dating this guy Matt, but the fact that she was including him in plans more than a year away told me just how much she appreciated him and wanted to keep him around. 

When your partner plans the future with you, it’s a sign they’re really blending your lives together. 

It taps into Psychologist Arthur Aron’s idea of “inclusion of other in the self.”

The idea is that they value having you in their life so much that they automatically see you as part of their own future. 

This shows they really appreciate you and want to keep you around.

7) They remember the little things

When your partner truly appreciates you, they’ll show it by remembering the little details you share

It might be things you casually mention, like a movie you want to see or an important meeting coming up at work.

When someone cares deeply about you, they value having you in their life and pay attention to what’s important to you. 

Research supports this: one study found that people who have strong feelings for someone are much better at remembering the small details about them.

Have you noticed that your partner remembers the little things you’ve mentioned? 

Maybe they send you a good luck text on the day of a big presentation, or they pick up your favorite snack without you asking.

If so, it’s a clear sign they deeply appreciate you and are paying close attention to what matters to you.

Final thoughts 

There you have it, 7 signs your partner truly appreciates you. 

How many of these signs do you recognize in your relationship?

If you’ve noticed a few, then there’s no doubt your partner really appreciates having you in their life and they’re committed to your happiness.