7 signs you have a true friend who genuinely has your back

Tina Fey by Tina Fey | September 6, 2024, 6:40 pm

In a world where friendships come in all shapes and sizes, finding someone who truly has your back is akin to discovering a rare gem amidst a sea of stones. 

These are the friends who stand by you through thick and thin, celebrating your victories and weathering the storms alongside you. 

In this article, we’ll unveil 7 unmistakable signs that signify you’ve found a true friend—someone who goes beyond mere camaraderie to embody loyalty, support, and unwavering companionship. 

1) They’re there in the tough times

It’s easy to be friends when the sun is shining and everything is going well. But true friendship is tested in the stormy weather of life.

A friend who truly has your back won’t just be there for the good times. They’ll stick by you when you’re struggling, too.

This might mean offering a shoulder to cry on when you’re going through a breakup, or being there for you when you’re dealing with a loss. It could be as simple as lending an ear when you need to vent, or as involved as supporting you through a major life crisis.

2) They don’t shy away from disagreements

This might seem a little strange, but hear me out. A true friend isn’t always the one who agrees with you on everything. In fact, it’s quite the opposite.

A friend who genuinely has your back isn’t afraid to disagree with you. They’re not just nodding along to everything you say, but they’re willing to challenge your ideas and perspectives. This doesn’t mean they’re argumentative or confrontational, but they value honesty over harmony.

Why is this a good thing? Because it shows that they respect you enough to voice their own opinions, even when they differ from yours. They’re not just telling you what you want to hear, but what they believe you need to hear.

3) They respect your boundaries

Now this is something I’ve explored at length in my book, Breaking The Attachment: How To Overcome Codependency in Your Relationship. True friendship isn’t about being inseparable, but about respecting each other’s personal space and boundaries.

You see, a friend who genuinely has your back understands that you have your own life outside of your friendship. They respect your need for alone time, they won’t guilt trip you for spending time with other people, and they don’t constantly demand your attention.

They understand that a healthy friendship is not about possessing the other person, but about supporting each other’s individual growth and happiness. They respect your autonomy and encourage you to nurture your personal interests and relationships.

And this isn’t just about physical boundaries. It extends to emotional boundaries as well. A true friend won’t pressure you to share more than you’re comfortable with, and they’ll respect your feelings even when they don’t understand them.

So if you have a friend who respects your boundaries, it’s a pretty good sign that they genuinely have your back.

4) They celebrate your achievements

As Maya Angelou once said, “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

A genuine friend embodies appreciation, respect, and celebration for your individuality and accomplishments.

They stand as your staunchest supporter, whether you’ve landed a dream job, conquered a marathon, or simply prepared a satisfying meal! 

Having someone genuinely champion your endeavors can be transformative. It epitomizes unwavering support and underscores a friendship that prioritizes your growth and success above all else.  

5) They keep your secrets safe

You know, there’s an old saying that goes, “A friend is someone who knows everything about you and still loves you.” And part of that involves trust, specifically, trusting them with your deepest secrets.

A friend who truly has your back will hold your secrets as if they were their own. They won’t gossip about you behind your back or share your private matters with others. They understand the sanctity of trust and respect the confidentiality of your shared experiences.

I recall a time when I was going through a particularly tough phase in my life. I confided in a friend, sharing things I’d never spoken about before. And you know what? Despite the years that have passed and the fact that we’ve drifted apart, my secrets have stayed safe with them.

That, to me, is the mark of a true friend – they safeguard your trust even when circumstances change. So if you have a friend who’s kept your confidences, cherish them. They’re a rare breed, and they most definitely have your back.

6) They give without expecting anything in return

Mark Twain once said, “The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.” This encapsulates what a true friend does – they give without expecting anything in return.

A friend who genuinely has your back supports you simply because they care about you, not because they want something in return. They lend you an ear, a shoulder, or a helping hand just because they want to see you happy.

I remember a time when I was moving houses and feeling overwhelmed with the whole process. One of my friends showed up unannounced, ready to help. She spent the entire day packing boxes and lifting furniture, refusing any sort of compensation. It was a simple act of kindness that I’ll never forget.

This selflessness is the hallmark of a true friendship. If you have such a friend, cherish them. They’re the kind of people who make the world a better place.

And as always, for more insights on relationships and personal growth, don’t forget to follow me on Facebook. I regularly share articles there that can help you navigate life’s ups and downs.

7) They’re honest, even when it hurts

Let’s face it, honesty can sometimes be a tough pill to swallow. But a friend who truly has your back won’t sugarcoat things or tell you what you want to hear just for the sake of your comfort.

No, a true friend values your growth over your comfort. They’ll tell you when you’ve messed up, when you’re wrong, or when they believe you’re making a mistake. It may sting at the moment, but they do it out of love and concern for your well-being.

I recall a time when I made a decision that was clearly not in my best interest. Instead of supporting me blindly, my friend sat me down and gave me a dose of tough love. It was hard to hear, but looking back, I realized it was exactly what I needed.

Real friends, real bonds: building bridges, not barriers!

In this article, we’ve explored seven such signs — indicators of a friend who authentically supports you. While each friendship is unique, these cues serve as a compass, guiding us to distinguish genuine connections from the superficial.

It’s not about seeking flawless companionship. It’s about acknowledging those who stand steadfastly beside you through thick and thin, respecting your boundaries, and exulting in your triumphs — those who offer unwavering honesty, even when it’s difficult to hear.

To dive deeper into understanding our connections with others and ourselves, I’d recommend this insightful video by Justin Brown that tackles the complexities of finding a life partner. His personal reflections and insights can offer valuable perspectives to help you navigate your own relationships and friendships.

YouTube video

Remember, every relationship is an opportunity for growth and self-discovery. So take a moment to reflect on your friendships. Do you see these signs? If you do, then cherish these bonds. And if not, don’t worry. Remember that true friendships take time to build and nurture. Keep your heart open, extend your kindness to others, and watch as genuine friendships bloom in their own time.

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