10 signs someone is only pretending to be a genuine person
In life, we often cross paths with folks who seem genuine, but underneath, they’re only putting up a front.
Identifying these individuals isn’t always easy. They’ve mastered the art of wearing a mask that hides their true nature.
Being a genuine person means being real, honest and authentic. But how can you tell if someone is simply pretending to be genuine?
Well, there are certain signs that can tip you off.
Below are 10 indicators to watch out for when you’re trying to figure out if someone is genuinely authentic, or just faking it.
1) They’re overly charming
In the course of our lives, we all meet people who instantly charm us. They’re magnetic, drawing us in with their charisma.
But sometimes, this charm can be a smokescreen.
People who are only pretending to be genuine often overcompensate with an excessive amount of charm. It’s like they’re playing a part. And while it might be convincing at first, cracks will eventually start to show.
They’ll use this charm to manipulate situations and people, always ensuring they come out looking like the good guy. But genuine people don’t need to play roles or manipulate others. They simply are who they are.
2) They’re inconsistent
In my own experience, I’ve noticed that one major sign of someone pretending to be genuine is inconsistency.
I once knew a person who would swing from being super friendly and supportive, to being distant and disinterested. It was like dealing with two completely different people.
At first, I thought maybe they were just having a bad day when they acted distant. But as time went on, it became clear that there was a pattern. They were friendly and supportive when they needed something or when they were in a social setting. But in private, or when they didn’t need anything from me, they were a different person altogether.
This inconsistency was a big red flag. Genuine people are consistent in their character. They don’t flip-flop based on context or convenience. Their authenticity is steady, not situational.
3) They’re quick to make promises
It’s often said that individuals who make promises quickly and often are more likely to break them.
People pretending to be genuine tend to over-promise. They make grand commitments without a second thought, often because they know it sounds good in the moment. It portrays them as reliable and trustworthy, but the reality is far from it.
Genuine people are careful with their commitments. They understand the weight of a promise and value their words. They’d rather under-promise and over-deliver than disappoint someone by not living up to their word.
4) They gossip a lot
Gossip can seem harmless, even entertaining at times. But it’s a habit that often points to a lack of authenticity.
Those faking authenticity tend to engage in gossip. They talk about others behind their backs, sharing private information or making negative comments. It’s a way for them to divert attention away from their own flaws and win approval from others.
On the contrary, truly genuine people tend to shy away from gossip. They respect the privacy of others and realize that spreading rumors or negative talk can harm relationships.
If they’re willing to talk about others behind their back, there’s nothing stopping them from doing the same to you. Be wary of those who gossip frequently – it might be a sign they’re not as genuine as they seem.
5) They’re never the one at fault
Nobody’s perfect. We all make mistakes, and most of us own up to them. But pretenders? Not so much.
I remember a colleague from a few years back, Tom. Tom was always quick to point fingers at others when things went south. He was never the one at fault and always had an excuse ready.
One time, he missed a critical deadline that set our project back by weeks. When confronted, instead of owning up, he blamed it on “miscommunication” and “lack of support from the team”.
In reality, he had been procrastinating and hadn’t put in the necessary work. But he would never admit it.
Genuine people are accountable. They accept their mistakes and learn from them.
6) They lack empathy
At the heart of every genuine person is a sense of empathy. They genuinely care about others and take interest in their feelings and experiences.
However, those pretending to be genuine often lack this key trait. They struggle to connect on a deeper emotional level and show genuine concern for others. Their interactions often remain superficial, focused more on themselves than on the person they’re interacting with.
Empathy requires vulnerability and authenticity. It requires you to put yourself in another’s shoes, to feel their joy, their pain, their struggles.
7) They’re always agreeable
Few things are as suspicious as someone who never disagrees.
Yes, it’s possible to meet a person who is naturally congenial, but if they’re always agreeing with everything you say, it might be a sign that they’re not being genuine.
Genuine people have their own opinions and aren’t afraid to express them. They value authenticity over popularity.
On the other hand, someone who’s pretending to be a genuine person might constantly agree with you just to win your favor. They don’t want to risk disagreeing with you for fear of breaking the facade they’ve constructed.
So next time you meet someone who’s perennially agreeable, question whether it’s because they truly share all your views, or if they’re simply pretending to fit in.
8) They crave attention
Attention-seeking behavior can be a clear sign of someone pretending to be genuine.
These individuals often strive to be the center of attention. They’ll do whatever it takes to keep the spotlight on them, whether it’s by exaggerating stories, showing off, or even causing drama.
Genuine people, on the other hand, don’t seek constant validation or attention from others. They are comfortable in their own skin and don’t need to be the center of attention to feel valued or important.
9) They’re overly concerned with their image
We all care about how others perceive us to some extent, but for those pretending to be genuine, image is everything. These people are often overly concerned with how they’re perceived by others and will go to great lengths to maintain a certain image.
You might notice them constantly checking their appearance, obsessively curating their social media profiles, or always steering the conversation towards their achievements and success.
This focus on image over substance is a clear sign that someone may be putting on a facade rather than being their true, authentic self. Genuine people know that what’s on the inside matters more than outside appearances.
10) They don’t respect your boundaries
At the end of the day, genuine people respect others. They value your time, your space, and your right to have and enforce personal boundaries.
Those pretending to be genuine, however, often disregard these boundaries. They’ll invade personal space, ignore requests for privacy, or push past limits without a second thought. It’s all about their own needs, wants, and comfort.
Respecting boundaries is not just about treating others well, it’s about acknowledging their individuality and autonomy.
Final thoughts: Authenticity doesn’t wear a mask
When it comes to the complex world of human behavior, there’s one thing that remains simple – genuine people don’t pretend.
Authenticity isn’t a performance, it’s a state of being. Genuine people don’t need to put on a show or hide behind a facade. Their actions and words align with their beliefs and values.
They accept themselves, flaws and all, and in doing so, they invite growth and change.
So as you navigate through life’s intricate social tapestry, remember to look beyond the surface. Question behaviors that seem inconsistent or too good to be true. Trust your instincts when something feels off.
After all, authenticity doesn’t wear a mask. It stands tall in its truth, unafraid of being seen for what it truly is.