10 signs someone is bad for your mental health, according to psychology
In the world of psychology, there’s a vast difference between people who uplift us and those who drain us.
The difference can often be felt in the pit of our stomach.
Those who are bad for our mental health often leave us feeling depleted, anxious, or even downright miserable.
As someone who’s navigated these choppy waters, I can tell you that identifying the signs is the first step to making positive changes.
And trust me, there are tell-tale signs that someone might be harmful to your mental well-being.
Let’s dive into what psychology has to say about this.
Here are ten signs someone might be bad for your mental health.
1) Constant negativity
Psychology tells us that the company we keep greatly influences our mental states.
There’s that old saying, “Misery loves company.”
Well, it turns out there’s some hard science to back it up.
Negativity can be infectious.
We’ve all experienced the draining effect of being around someone who only sees the glass as half-empty, unable to appreciate the brighter side of things.
If you’re constantly around someone who’s pessimistic, critical, or always playing the victim, their energy can rub off on you.
It can be exhausting, and over time, it can negatively affect your mental health.
Now, I’m not saying we should abandon friends when they’re going through a rough patch. We all have bad days or even bad weeks.
But if someone consistently drags you down with their negativity, it might be time to reassess the relationship.
Remember, you have the right to protect your peace and happiness.
And sometimes, that means lovingly distancing yourself from negative influences.
Don’t feel guilty about doing what’s best for your mental health.
2) They make you doubt your self-worth
Self-esteem is the foundation of our mental health, and those who constantly belittle or criticize us can chip away at it.
I remember a so-called friend from my past.
No matter what I achieved or how hard I tried, she always had a way of making me feel like I was not good enough.
Her words, subtly or overtly, always echoed the same message: “You could do better.”
It wasn’t about constructive criticism or helping me grow.
It was about her need to feel superior.
Over time, this eroded my self-confidence. I began to question my abilities and worth.
It took a toll on my mental health until I realized what was happening.
Toxic people often use this tactic to maintain control or feel better about themselves.
If someone in your life constantly makes you feel inadequate, it’s a sign that they might be bad for your mental health.
3) They’re always the victim
Have you ever noticed how some people never take responsibility for their actions?
It’s always someone else’s fault, or the world is always against them.
According to psychology, this is known as a victim mentality.
It’s a mindset where a person believes they’re perpetually the victim, which absolves them of any responsibility for their actions.
This mentality can be contagious and detrimental to your mental health.
Being around someone who’s always playing the victim can lead you to develop a similar mindset, seeing life as something that happens to you rather than something you can control.
Moreover, constantly trying to rescue or support someone with a victim mentality can leave you feeling drained and helpless.
It’s essential to be aware of this pattern and protect your mental well-being.
4) They’re manipulative
Manipulation is a major red flag when it comes to assessing the impact someone has on your mental health.
A manipulator uses tactics, often subtle and covert, to control others.
Here’s the catch – manipulators are often charming and well-liked, making it hard to see their true colors.
They may twist your words, play on your emotions, and use guilt or intimidation to get their way.
Over time, being on the receiving end of manipulation can cause anxiety, confusion, and self-doubt.
If you feel like you’re constantly being manipulated or controlled by someone, it’s a clear sign they’re bad for your mental health.
Remember: healthy relationships are based on mutual respect and understanding, not control and manipulation.
5) They regularly dismiss your feelings
We all have moments of insensitivity, where we fail to fully grasp the weight of someone else’s emotional state.
However, if there’s someone in your life who consistently disregards your feelings, it could be a sign they’re bad for your mental health.
Imagine sharing your worries, fears, or frustrations with this person, only to have them brushed aside or trivialized.
This consistent dismissal can lead you to question the validity of your emotions, causing significant psychological distress over time.
Psychologists stress the importance of having our feelings validated.
If someone consistently dismisses your feelings or makes you feel like you’re overreacting, it can be damaging to your mental health.
Remember, your feelings are valid, and you have every right to express them.
Don’t let anyone make you feel otherwise.
6) They thrive on drama
Drama can be exciting, it can spice up an otherwise mundane day.
But there’s a difference between occasional dramatic events and someone who seems to bask in the chaos they create.
Look closely at the people in your life.
Is there someone who always seems to be at the center of conflict?
Someone who thrives on tension and discord? This could be a sign that they’re negatively impacting your mental health.
Psychologists suggest that exposure to constant drama can lead to heightened stress and anxiety levels.
It’s crucial for your wellbeing to surround yourself with peace and harmony, not constant turbulence.
If you notice someone is perpetually embroiled in drama, it could be time to reconsider their role in your life.
7) They’re unreliable
Reliability is a fundamental aspect of trust in a relationship.
And trust, as we know, is essential for our mental health.
There was a time in my life when I had a close friend who was perpetually unreliable.
Promises were made and then broken, plans were set and then cancelled at the last minute, and I was often left feeling let down and disappointed.
This inconsistency took a toll on me.
I began to question my worth and felt like I was not important enough to be prioritized.
If you find that someone in your life is consistently unreliable, it could be harmful to your mental health.
Trusting relationships are built on dependability and respect for each other’s time and commitments.
8) They’re overly critical
Constructive criticism can help us grow and improve, but there’s a fine line between helpful feedback and destructive critique.
You might have someone in your life who seems to have an endless supply of criticism for you, often presented under the guise of ‘just being honest’ or ‘trying to help you improve’.
Someone who’s always pointing out your flaws, making negative comments about your appearance, or belittling your achievements is doing more harm than good.
This excessive criticism can gradually erode your self-confidence, decrease your self-esteem, and lead to self-doubt and even depression.
Psychologists emphasize that while constructive criticism is beneficial, persistent negative criticism can have a significant adverse effect on our mental health.
If you’re regularly on the receiving end of harsh or unnecessary critiques, it might be a signal that the person delivering them is not conducive to your mental well-being.
9) They’re excessively generous
Generosity is generally viewed as a positive trait.
But, like everything else in life, too much of a good thing can become harmful.
There might be someone in your life who showers you with gifts or favors to an excessive degree.
While this might initially seem endearing or flattering, it can sometimes hide a darker intention: control and manipulation.
Psychologists warn that excessive generosity can often be a method used by manipulative individuals to create a sense of obligation and guilt, making it difficult for you to maintain autonomy in the relationship.
If this generosity feels overwhelming and strings-attached rather than genuine and free-spirited, it could be a sign that this person is bad for your mental health.
10) They don’t respect your boundaries
At the end of the day, the most significant sign that someone is bad for your mental health is a lack of respect for your boundaries.
Boundaries are crucial for our mental and emotional well-being.
They help us maintain our self-respect, our individuality, and our mental peace.
You may have someone in your life who repeatedly oversteps the limits you’ve set, leaving you feeling uncomfortable and disrespected.
Whether it’s demanding too much of your time, invading your personal space, or discussing topics you’d rather avoid, these actions can leave deep emotional scars.
Respect for personal boundaries is crucial for maintaining healthy relationships and a sound mind.
If you find someone continually crossing the line, it’s a clear sign they could be damaging your mental health.
It’s not just about the boundary crossed; it’s about the disregard for your feelings and well-being.
Always remember, you have every right to establish and protect your boundaries.
Anyone who doesn’t respect that doesn’t deserve a place in your life.
Making sense of it all
The field of psychology provides a great deal of insight into how our interactions with others can affect our mental health.
And one of the most critical lessons is recognizing when someone is harmful to our well-being.
Acknowledging the impact someone has on your mental health is a critical step towards ensuring your overall well-being.
However, it’s important to remember that people aren’t simply “good” or “bad” for our mental health in black and white terms.
We all have our strengths and weaknesses, good days and bad days, and we all make mistakes.
That being said, consistent patterns that drain your energy, lower your self-esteem, or leave you feeling stressed and anxious are signs that shouldn’t be ignored.
It’s about recognizing these patterns and understanding their impact on your mental state.
This doesn’t necessarily mean you need to cut these people out of your life completely.
Sometimes, it’s about setting boundaries or having open conversations about the issues at hand.
In other instances, it could mean seeking professional help to navigate the complexities of the relationship.
Remember, it’s not just about identifying people who might be harmful to your mental health.
It’s equally crucial to seek out and nurture relationships with those who lift you up, validate your feelings, respect your boundaries, and contribute positively to your life.
Ultimately, taking care of your mental health is a personal journey that requires self-awareness, courage, and sometimes making tough decisions.
It’s about creating an environment for yourself where you can thrive mentally and emotionally.
Every relationship in our lives offers us an opportunity for growth and learning.
Recognizing the signs of a potentially harmful relationship is not about assigning blame but setting yourself free from interactions that do more harm than good.
Remember, it’s your journey.
You have every right to choose who gets to accompany you on it.
Your mental health is worth it.