Do you want to take the next step with your man, but feel unsure about whether he’ll make a good father?

Past child development studies often ignored fathers, because it was thought that being a good dad meant providing for his family. 

However, newer studies have found that children need much more from their fathers than food on the table and a roof over their heads. Dads impact many aspects of a child’s development including happiness and cognitive development.

Psychologists say many behaviors show that a man is ready for children and will make a great Dad. So read through the ones I’ve picked out, and hopefully, your baby daddy-to-be checks out okay!

1) Playfulness

Have you ever seen one of those dads who is always in amongst it with the kids? 

Maybe he’s the first to dive in and help with games at a party, or when you turn around he’s all dressed up like a fairy princess. Perhaps he just loves getting out and playing football with the kids. 

Whatever it is, this playfulness is an important part of being a great dad.

My dad was one of these dads.

He loved doing things with my sister and me and he’s still doing it today with the grandchildren. If we weren’t kicking a ball around together he was helping us make treehuts or teaching us new games. My dad was super involved and just a big kid himself. But we loved it, and I know my sister and I bonded with him through this.

In this article, the psychologist explains that while mothers usually bond through gentle caretaking, fathers often bond through play. They even go on to say that non-maternal parents have a huge impact on the happiness and cognitive development of their children!

So, I guess I’ve got Dad to thank for all of that!

2) Good communication skills

As you may have guessed, a man must have good communication skills to make an incredible father. 

Luckily, this one is easy to figure out because you don’t have to wait to watch him chat with someone’s kids. You already know if he’s good at this or not.

If your man can talk to you about anything and doesn’t shy away from awkward or possibly uncomfortable conversations, chances are he’s a great communicator.

In this article, the psychologist says it’s important not to shy away from things that might make you feel uncomfortable, like girl talks if you have a daughter. So if he’s doing this with you, then there’s a good chance that he’ll be able to do this with his children too.

The psychologist continues by saying that it’s important for men to have this open communication with their children because if you open yourself up to your child they will begin to learn the building blocks to a healthy relationship, eg; vulnerability, forgiveness, and tenderness.

3) Being a good winner and loser

We all love to win, but have you ever lost to someone and they’ve rubbed it in your face? Even if it was just a board game, it doesn’t feel great. How about when you’ve won and the other person was a bad loser? Neither of these are attributes I’d want my children to have.

So it’s really important to model the way we want our children to act. If we want kind winners, we have to be them. If we want our kids to be good losers, we also have to show them that we can lose respectably.

Showing their children how to act when they win or lose is something a great dad needs to do. The psychologist who talks about this, says that children are always watching and often imitate their Dads. 

So if he’s already a good role model, he might just make an incredible father.

A good Dad also knows when to let his children win, it builds their confidence!

4) Consistency

How do you feel when people are inconsistent with you? Yeah exactly, and you’re an adult.

Children feel inconsistencies more strongly because they are learning about the world and themselves all at once. When we are inconsistent with our children, they can become anxious because they don’t know how their parents will react to things.

Moms are normally more consistent than Dads because they are the ones who are usually the primary carers. They can see what happens if children don’t have a routine or know how you will react if they play up.

Traditionally dads were off at work and would disrupt this routine because they didn’t have to deal with the consequences or even notice them.

According to this therapist, one way to be consistent as a parent is to set limits with your children. This is a way for your children to know what the rules are, and how you will react if they stretch or break one. That way there are no surprises and therefore no anxious children.

5) Interest and involvement in their education 

I’m not sure if you’ve noticed that there are two kinds of men. The men that pooh-pooh education and the kind that encourages people to strive for their best. 

Sometimes it’s because of their own experiences at school. However, my dad didn’t have a great time at school and he still encouraged us to get involved and do our best to succeed.

My mom was actually a teacher, but it was Dad who would get involved with helping me with homework and tutoring me when I struggled with Math.

Research shows that children are 44% more likely to achieve A’s in school and 33% less likely to repeat a grade when they have an engaged and involved father.

So if you’ve noticed that your man encourages others positively regarding education, this is a big sign that he will make an incredible father.

6) He’s responsible

Do you notice that this guy always has things sorted? Maybe it’s paying the bills on time or perhaps it’s organizing everything for a vacation.

Another good way to spot if he’s responsible or not is if you have a pet. Does he look after it? Is he the first one to remember to feed it or take it out, clean up after it, etc? If you’re nodding along, it sounds like you are in luck!

It might not surprise you that being responsible is an important part of being a good parent. But many men leave most of the responsibilities to the women when it comes to parenting, so if you’ve snagged yourself a responsible one, then well done. This is a great sign.

This psychologist also agrees that getting involved and sharing the load with the other parent, is another way to be a great Dad. 

7) He’s present

When you spend time together, what is your man like? Is he always on his phone, does he count watching TV or playing video games as quality time? 

When someone is present, they are fully there with you. They listen to you and share things with you. There aren’t distractions.

This psychologist talks about how important it is for a father to be fully present in his child’s life. He says that this includes having a close and affectionate relationship. 

They explain, just as others have in this article, how important modeling is. So being present with his partner, friends, and family as well as his children, will show them how to be present with others. 

Here is a lovely quote from this article, “Children make wiser choices in their own lives as a result of the lessons learned while growing up”. 

So if we want our children to live mindfully, we must also live like that as parents. 

His present to his children must be, yeah you guessed it, his presence.