It’s not groundbreaking news that women can be quite competitive when it comes to outshining each other. It’s something that we often pretend doesn’t exist but when we’re together, the engine of female competition is just lulling in the background. 

It’s not something we chose to be engineered to compete with each other, either. 

Female competition has been hardwired into our biology from millions of years of evolution. 

It takes real self-awareness and confidence to exit the vicious cycle of competition. And let’s just face it — some women are way more competitive than others. 

When you have a profound inner sense of value and confidence, the need to compete tends to subside, though. 

But how can you tell when women have excelled at inner worth and transcended the impulse to compete with others? 

In this article, I’ll discuss some behaviors women exhibit when they don’t care about trivial competition.

1) They value solitude

Women who exude natural confidence find strength in solitude. 

They understand the power of spending time alone, reflecting on their thoughts, and indulging in self-care. 

This isn’t loneliness — it’s a chosen type of isolation to replenish your energy and clarify your goals in the absence of outside influence. 

It can get tiring being around people and trying to live up to their subtle expectations. Often, you don’t realize how much it stresses you out until you take a deliberate step away from it. 

I know personally that from time to time, I just need to get away from everyone. 

When I do, I can almost feel a metaphysical weight lifting from my shoulders. I start to feel lighter, more in tune with my own rhythm, and ready to go inward. 

It’s in these moments of solitude that they plot their next moves and find peace in their own company.

Spending time alone has many personal benefits for women including: 

• Reducing relationship dependency
• Triggering creativity
• Improving sleep
• Facilitating self-exploration 

The deeper inward you go, the more you’ll surely realize how quirky you are — don’t despair!

2) They embrace their quirks

How much do you embrace your weirdness? 

Self-assured women know that their quirks are not just random idiosyncrasies. Rather, they’re integral parts of their identity. They don’t need to be hidden or disguise. 

All too often, women try to blend in as much as humanly possible. They try to mimic what others do in hope that they’ll be accepted as one of the crowd. 

Having the guts to celebrate your individuality is a testament to self-confidence.

It’s not about being arrogant and not caring what people think, it’s more about just not lying to yourself about who you are to please people. 

3) They speak with conviction

When these women talk, people listen — not because they demand attention in an obtrusive or obnoxious way, but because they speak with authentic conviction. 

Because of their intrinsic authentic nature, people have learned to expect that when they speak, they say what they truly mean. 

We all know the opposite type of person, right? 

You know, the gaggle of geese that seem to make an unholy amount of noise without ever actually saying anything? 

4) They prioritize health over appearance

I think we can all agree that when it comes to beauty standards and expectations, it’s tough to be a woman. 

Virtually everywhere you go, female beauty is put under a microscope and it can often feel like we’ll never escape that discomfort of up-close scrutiny. 

It can take a lot to overcome it — and some women do!

While society obsesses overlooks, these confident beings focus on health — mental, physical, and emotional. Women who have transcended the need to please the societal gaze exercise for strength, not to please onlookers. 

It’s pretty much a win-win since exercising makes them look great anyway. The difference lies in their motive. They’re not doing it for you!

5) They’re masters of boundaries

Boundary setting is a skill that shapes success in various spheres of life. 

Understanding your limits and getting them across to others is a hallmark of self-respect. 

Women who have mastered the art of setting boundaries can easily delineate their comfort zones and professional boundaries. They make their expectations clear in all areas of their lives.

It doesn’t necessarily mean that they’re totally selfish and uncompromising — although that extreme side of the spectrum exists. 

Rather, it means they don’t get swept away feeling like they should say yes to every social event when they know they should be taking it easy.

This clarity helps prevent misunderstandings and ensures that they are treated with respect. By establishing firm boundaries, self-confident women protect their time and well-being. 

Do you struggle to say no? 

Here are a few tips to follow to get better at setting boundaries: 

• Think before reactively agreeing to things
• Get used to saying “Let me think about it”
• Don’t feel bad when you say no — people use it as a reason to keep pushing
• Make your own plans and stick to them

Women who set boundaries have much more time to spend on enriching their lives from within. 

6) They cultivate a rich inner life

Having a rich inner life is a lush landscape of passions, dreams, interests, and curiosities that fuel your zest for life.

Unlike those who might passively wait for external circumstances to bring them happiness, self-assured women cultivate joy and fulfillment from within.

They recognize that true contentment and happiness are crafted from one’s own actions, thoughts, and pursuits.

One of the primary ways they enrich their inner life is through reading. Books become gateways to other worlds, sources of inspiration, and tools for learning. Through the pages of novels, biographies, poetry, and more,

When was the last time you read a book? 

If it hasn’t been for a while, why not go back and reread your favorite book of all time? Or better yet — start a new one!

Journaling is another great way to enrich inner lives. Writing down your thoughts, feelings, and aspirations helps you clarify things and track personal growth over time.

I know from personal experience that journaling can feel like a bit of a slog at the beginning, but after a while, it becomes habitual. 

Don’t know where to start? 

There are plenty of journaling great apps out if analog just isn’t your thing.

Growing into confidence

You might be reading this and nodding along thinking “This describes me perfectly.” 

On the other hand, you might not be — and that’s okay. 

Everyone experiences life differently, and you might be someone who struggles a lot with self-confidence. 

You might find yourself naturally gravitating towards people-pleasing, often sacrificing your own personal needs in the process. 

Self-confidence is something you can learn — take it from me, I know this!

Don’t feel disheartened if the points I mention don’t apply to you. They can also serve as signposts for what you can do to enrich your life. They are not intended to condemn you. 

If you’re trying to work on your self-confidence and escape the competitive rat race, try these steps: 

• Spend more time alone
• Start setting clear boundaries
• Embrace your quirky side
• Make books and learning a part of your mental diet

Positive change is just around the corner!