If these 7 things feel “normal” to you, you’ve probably settled in life without realizing it
Settling in life is something we all fear. It’s the point when comfort outweighs ambition and we stop striving for more.
But what if you’ve settled without even realizing it?
There are seven key signs that could suggest you’ve fallen into this trap. They’re things that might seem “normal” to you, but they’re actually indicators that you’ve stopped pushing your boundaries.
In this article, I’m going to reveal these seven tell-tale signs. If you recognize them in your own life, it might be time to reevaluate and stir things up a bit.
1) You’re constantly bored
Have you ever caught yourself frequently feeling bored? If so, that’s a red flag.
Boredom is a sign that you’re not engaging with life in the way you should be. It’s an indicator that your mind isn’t being challenged and you’re not pushing yourself to learn new things.
We all experience boredom from time to time. But when it becomes a regular part of your life, it’s a sign that you’re cruising on auto-pilot.
If everything feels “normal” and routine to the point of boredom, you might have settled into your comfort zone. And the danger with comfort zones is, they often keep us from realizing our full potential.
It’s time to mix things up if this is sounding all too familiar.
2) You’re not excited about your goals
There was a time when I found myself feeling indifferent towards my goals. The things that used to inspire me, didn’t excite me anymore. It was as if I had lost my sense of direction.
Looking back now, I realize that it wasn’t because my goals were unachievable or unrealistic.
It was simply because I had settled. I had allowed myself to be comfortable with mediocrity, and in doing so, I lost sight of my ambitions.
If you find that your future plans no longer ignite a spark in you, it could be a sign that you’ve settled.
Goals are meant to motivate us, to keep us striving for more. They should get us excited about what’s ahead.
When we lose that excitement, we tend to just go through the motions of life without really living it.
So check in with yourself – are your dreams still making you feel alive?
3) You stop learning new things
The human brain is wired to seek out new information and experiences. In fact, neuroscientists have found that novelty boosts dopamine levels, which are linked to motivation and learning.
Yet, if you’ve noticed that you’re not engaging in new experiences or actively seeking out new knowledge, this could be an indication that you’ve settled.
When we’re content with what we already know and stop nurturing our curiosity, we’re essentially telling ourselves that there’s no room for growth.
This lack of growth can lead to stagnation in various aspects of our life, from our careers to our relationships.
When was the last time you learned something new? If it’s been a while, it might be time to step outside your comfort zone and rekindle your love for learning.
4) You’re always tired
Tiredness is a part of life. We all have those days when we’re drained and just can’t wait to hit the bed.
But if you’re constantly feeling tired, even after a good night’s sleep, it might be more than just physical fatigue.
Constant tiredness can be an indication of emotional or mental exhaustion. It can be a sign that you’re not fulfilled or stimulated by your current lifestyle.
When we’ve settled in life, our usual activities can feel draining rather than energizing because they don’t align with our true desires. It’s a form of dissatisfaction that can manifest as constant fatigue.
If you’re always feeling tired without any obvious medical reason, it might be worth checking in with yourself to see if you’ve unknowingly settled in life.
5) You stay in a job you don’t enjoy
We spend a huge chunk of our lives working, so if your job feels like a never-ending chore, that’s a big red flag.
Sure, every job has its boring moments, but if you constantly dread Monday mornings and count down the hours until Friday, you’re probably settling.
When you stay in a job that drains you, it’s easy to convince yourself that stability is more important than fulfillment. But deep down, you know you’re capable of more.
The problem is, when you stay in a job you don’t enjoy, you stop growing. You start going through the motions, doing just enough to get by.
Before you know it, years have passed, and you’re still stuck in the same place, wondering where your passion went.
The truth is, a job should challenge you, inspire you, or at the very least, not make you feel miserable every day. If you can’t imagine doing this for the next five years, maybe it’s time to start looking for something better.
6) Your relationships feel more like obligations than connections
Friendships and relationships should bring joy, not feel like a to-do list you begrudgingly check off.
If you feel drained rather than energized after spending time with certain people, that’s a sign something’s off.
Maybe you’re maintaining relationships out of habit, guilt, or simply because you don’t want to be alone. But if you don’t genuinely enjoy their company, what’s the point?
When you settle for surface-level or one-sided relationships, you’re robbing yourself of the deep, fulfilling connections you actually crave.
Real relationships—whether romantic or platonic—should make you feel seen, heard, and appreciated.
If you’re constantly making excuses for why you can’t leave a draining relationship, ask yourself: Are you staying out of love or out of fear?
7) You often tell yourself “It’s not that bad”
This is the ultimate phrase of someone settling in life. You’re not exactly happy, but you’re not completely miserable either, so you convince yourself that things are fine.
But here’s the catch—just because something isn’t a disaster doesn’t mean it’s good.
Telling yourself “it’s not that bad” is really just a way of avoiding the hard truth: You want more, but you’re afraid of going after it. You’re simply suppressing your true desires and convincing yourself that mediocrity is enough.
The longer you stay in this mindset, the easier it becomes to lower your standards in every area of life. You stop expecting excitement in your career, depth in your relationships, or passion in your day-to-day life.
But deep down, you know you want more than just “not that bad.”
And the good news? You don’t have to settle. You always have the option to raise the bar and start chasing what truly makes you happy.
Final thoughts
Settling doesn’t mean you’ve failed. It means you’ve grown complacent. And the first step towards change is recognizing this.
Recognizing that you’ve settled in life isn’t about self-blame or regret. It’s about awakening to the reality that there’s more to life than what you’ve been settling for.
Take Albert Einstein’s words to heart, “Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving.” If these seven signs resonate with you and you feel as though you’ve been standing still, it’s time to make a change.
Your life is a beautiful journey of constant evolution and growth. It’s never too late to shake things up and strive for more.
After all, we have but one life to live, make sure it’s one that brings you joy and fulfillment.