7 psychological tricks that can make you more charismatic and influential

Lily Gareth by Lily Gareth | May 7, 2024, 6:50 pm

Charismatic people make great leaders. 

They know how to get people excited about the stuff they’re passionate about and convince them to jump on board with their missions. 

So, it’s no surprise that charisma is a quality that many people want to have.

Here are 7 psychological tricks to rule the minds and hearts of those around you.

1) Use the right body language

Influential folks really nail non-verbal communication. They get that using the right gestures, mannerisms, and body posture which helps their message hit home with a bigger crowd. 

Positive non-verbal cues not only enhance your authoritative appearance but also contribute to a sense of being in control.

Look at TED speakers—they’re pros at the body language game.

No matter what they’re talking about, they master those little details, from smooth movements to expressive hand gestures and confident poses that scream trustworthiness.

On the flip side, imagine conversing with people stuck in stiff postures, avoiding eye contact, and wearing poker faces. Even if their content is personal and top-notch, then you may leave unimpressed.

2) Mirror your conversation partners

Speaking of body language, charismatic people resort to a communication hack that helps them engage better with people, which is body language mirroring.

Mirroring or mimicking a person physically or verbally is hardwired in our brains, and we usually go for it subconsciously when we want to build a connection with someone.

The result: immediate rapport.

By matching your body language and tone of voice with the person you want to charm, you create an invisible bond by subtly implying that you are more alike than different.

I learned this trick during my sales career.

Before diving into business talk, I’d mirror my clients’ energy and gestures. It worked like a charm, boosting my confidence and making our connection feel extra solid when I pitched my sales.

3) Actively listen

Another key trait of charismatic people is how good they make those around them feel, whether colleagues, partners, or family members.

How do they do that?

They listen. Not to respond but to truly understand your story, recognize your feelings, and, in essence, appreciate you.

When folks feel acknowledged and listened to, it boosts their self-esteem, making them feel valued. That’s why they’re more likely to return the favor and try to meet your expectations.

Charismatic individuals also leverage active listening to smooth out tricky situations. They navigate through tense moments with finesse by genuinely hearing out everyone involved and aiming for solutions that benefit all parties.

Think of Oprah Winfrey.

Her ability to engage with guests on her talk shows, ask thoughtful questions, and genuinely listen to their responses has made her one of the most influential personalities in the media industry.

4) Make others feel valued

Want to really draw people in and stick in their minds? Make them feel valued.


Simple stuff, like using their name throughout the chat, throwing in some genuine compliments, and chatting up their strengths.

These moves make the person across from you feel like a million bucks, appreciated for just being them.

Another way to make them feel worthwhile is remembering details about them like their birthdays, important events in their lives, or simply their favorite snack.

My mentor at work aced those tactics. Everyone loved him because he made everyone in the office feel special.

And get this: even to this day, he sends me a birthday gift basket with all my favorite goodies. Now, can you forget someone like that?

5) Get personal

One of the magical skills of charismatic people is choosing when to be vulnerable, which makes them more human and relatable to the people they wish to bond with.

You build trust and create an honest atmosphere by opening up about yourself and sharing your personal stories. Your relationship becomes a two-way street that makes people feel empathetic.

Have you ever had that moment when your demanding boss or someone you usually clash with suddenly shows their vulnerable side? Perhaps by telling you about their family troubles or some health scare.

It’s like a total game-changer, right? 

It flips the script on your feelings toward them.

6) Dress to impress

Alright, here’s the deal.

We all know we shouldn’t judge a book by its cover, but let’s be honest—how we dress totally shapes what people think of us. If you want to leave a mark on your crew, you’ve got to play the fashion game right for the occasion.

Picture this: rocking up to a networking event in slacks and a tee?

Yeah, it’s not exactly shouting charisma, is it? And hey, the same goes for going all-out fancy at a chill hangout.

To grab people’s attention, you must nail the outfit game.

Think about where you are and what’s happening, and let your style show a bit of your personality. It’s not just about looking sharp; it’s about telling the world, “Hey, I get this scene, and I’m here to rock it.”

So, let your wardrobe do the talking; wear something that makes you feel powerful and leave them all impressed.

7) Use affirmative words

Looking sharp and exuding confidence is just one side of the charisma game.

To truly win people over, you’ve got to lead with assurance. A great way to do this is using affirmative words that radiate hope, positivity, and agreement when fitting.

Nobody enjoys hanging out with a downer. When you empower your conversation partners with uplifting words, you tap into their emotions and inspire them to get on board with your ideas.

Opting for positive expressions like “absolutely,” “indeed,” and “precisely” can really boost agreement levels with your conversation partner. 

But here’s the catch: be mindful of your chosen situations and ensure you genuinely share the same opinions.

Final thoughts:

At the end of the day, we all would like things to go our way, and being charismatic certainly helps.

However, we have to be careful not to turn into some Machiavellian character while navigating life.

The key is to find a sweet spot between what we want and what others need without going all power-hungry.