Ever heard the saying, “It’s not just what you say, but how you say it?”

Often, we don’t realize that our words can either enhance or undermine our self-assurance and confidence.

And just like that, the way we communicate can either draw people towards us or push them away.

Have you ever stopped to consider that some phrases you use frequently might be doing more harm than good?

See, there’s a good chance you might be unknowingly using a few phrases that are chipping away at your image of confidence.

These are the little self-sabotaging phrases we sprinkle into our conversation without even realizing it. And the thing is, they can make us appear less sure of ourselves than we actually are.

So, if you’re thinking, “How can I sound more self-assured and confident?” it’s time to take a closer look at your vocabulary.

Here are seven phrases you should stop using if you want to project confidence and assurance.

You’ll be surprised at how changing your speech can lead to bigger transformations.

1) “I think”

Now, don’t get me wrong here.

“I think” isn’t always a bad phrase to use. It’s just that, when you use it frequently, it can make you come across as uncertain or unsure.

Imagine this scenario.

You’re in a meeting and you say, “I think we should go with this approach.” It sounds like you’re not entirely sure, right? Like there’s still room for doubt.

But let’s change the phrase and say, “I believe we should go with this approach.” Now, doesn’t that sound more confident and assertive?

2) “I’m not sure, but…”

Let me share something personal with you.

A few years back, I noticed that I had a habit of starting my sentences with “I’m not sure, but…”. It was my way of cushioning my opinions, of not coming across as too assertive.

Well, guess what happened?

People started taking my words less seriously. It was as if I was signaling them to disregard what I was about to say because even I wasn’t sure about it.

It took a friend pointing it out for me to realize this habit. And the moment I did, I decided to kick it to the curb.

Now, I refrain from using “I’m not sure, but…” and instead directly state my thoughts or opinions. And you know what? Not only do people take me more seriously now, but I also feel more confident in sharing my thoughts.

3) “Sorry, but…”

Many people find themselves apologizing unnecessarily. It becomes a habit—starting sentences with “Sorry, but…” even when there’s no reason to apologize. For example:

“Sorry, but can you pass me the salt?” “Sorry, but I have a suggestion.”

Sound familiar?

Initially, over-apologizing can feel like a way of being polite. However, over time, it can become a crutch, making it seem as if you’re seeking permission to express your thoughts or take up space.

The solution?

Become aware of how often you say “Sorry, but…” and actively work to remove it from your vocabulary unless a genuine apology is needed.

Dropping unnecessary apologies can make a significant difference—you’ll sound more confident and assertive.

4) “Maybe”

“Maybe” is one of those words that can easily creep into our vocabulary and stay there, all the while subtly eroding our confidence.

Let’s look at it this way.

When you say “maybe”, it often implies that you’re indecisive or unsure. It doesn’t reflect a firm stand or decision. And frequent usage of “maybe” can give others the impression that you lack certainty or confidence.

I’ve found that replacing “maybe” with a clear “yes” or “no” can work wonders in boosting your self-assuredness.

“Yes, I’ll be able to do it by the end of the week.” “No, I won’t be available for the meeting tomorrow.”

See how these sentences reflect decisiveness?

5) “Just”

This simple word, “just”, though seemingly harmless, can actually undercut your authority and make you sound less self-assured.

Think about it.

When you say “I’m just checking in” or “I just wanted to ask”, it almost sounds like an apology for your action or request. It minimizes the importance of what you’re saying.

Instead of saying “I just wanted to ask a question”, try “I have a question”. It’s a small change, but it makes a big difference in how confident you sound.

6) “I’m no expert, but…”

We’ve all been there.

You’re in a meeting or a conversation, and you have a point to make or an idea to share. But instead of stating it outright, you preface it with “I’m no expert, but…”.

And just like that, you’ve belittled your own input before anyone else has had a chance to.

Let’s be gentle with ourselves.

There’s no need to downplay our thoughts or ideas. Each one of us brings something unique to the table, and our opinions matter.

Try this instead: “Here’s my perspective…” or “From my experience…”. These phrases acknowledge your unique viewpoint without undermining your confidence.

7) “Does that make sense?”

When you end your statements with “Does that make sense?”, it can come across as if you’re unsure about the clarity or value of your own words.

In fact, this phrase often signals a lack of confidence in what you’ve just said.

It’s better saying: “I hope I’ve been clear” or “Do you have any questions?” These phrases communicate the same intent, but in a more confident and self-assured manner.

The final word

Recognize any of these phrases from your own vocabulary?

If so, don’t be too hard on yourself. We’re all works in progress, and recognizing the need for change is the first step towards growth.

Now, here’s the empowering part – you have the power to alter your speech patterns.

Start by observing your language. Pay attention to the phrases you use often. Notice how they make you feel and how they affect the way others perceive you.

Then, start making the shift. Replace those confidence-sapping phrases with ones that reflect your true self-assuredness and capability.

It may be a little challenging at first—after all, old habits tend to stick around. Big changes take time and are part of a gradual process. But each conscious choice to use more confident language is a step forward.