People who were raised with very little order and discipline usually display these 9 traits later in life

Lucas Graham by Lucas Graham | October 22, 2024, 6:53 pm

As a kid, it’s easy to see your parents’ rules as nothing more than annoying limits on your freedom. But as you get older, you start to realize that discipline and structure help shape who you are.

For those who grew up without much order, this lack of guidance often leads to certain traits—some good, some challenging—that pop up later in life.

In this article, we’ll look at 9 common traits seen in people who were raised without much discipline.

From creativity and flexibility to difficulty in following rules, these qualities give us a better understanding of how our upbringing shapes the way we navigate the world.

1) Unpredictable behavior

Growing up in an environment with little order and discipline can result in unpredictable behavior in adulthood.

Why, you ask? Well, think about it.

Children raised with a lack of structure don’t have the opportunity to learn the cause-and-effect relationships that govern much of life.

They’re not sure about what comes next, what their actions might result in, or even what’s expected of them.

As these children grow into adults, this uncertainty can manifest as unpredictability.

They might juggle multiple tasks at once, jump from one interest to another, or find it difficult to stick to routines or schedules.

2) Difficulty in following rules

I have a friend, let’s call him John, who was raised in a very free-spirited household. Rules and routines were pretty much non-existent.

His parents believed in letting him find his own path, which is wonderful in theory.

But as John grew older, he found it incredibly hard to adapt to environments where rules were necessary, like school or work.

Now don’t get me wrong, John is one of the smartest people I know.

But he constantly struggled with deadlines, punctuality, and even simple rules like not using his phone during meetings.

It wasn’t that he was intentionally being rebellious. It’s just that the concept of strict rules was so foreign to him, he found it hard to comply.

3) Creativity and innovation

Here’s something that might surprise you.

A lack of discipline and order in one’s upbringing doesn’t always lead to negative outcomes. In fact, it can foster creativity and innovation.

A structured environment encourages conformity and adherence to established norms.

But when a child is raised in an environment where they’re free to explore and experiment, it can result in them thinking outside the box.

Studies have shown that children raised in less structured environments tend to be better at tasks requiring creative problem solving.

They’ve learned to think independently and innovate because they weren’t always bound by a rigid set of rules.

4) Struggle with self-discipline

Without the experience of enforced rules and routines, it can be challenging for these individuals to set and stick to their own personal goals and deadlines.

They may find themselves procrastinating, struggling to form good habits, or constantly putting off tasks until the last minute.

This isn’t because they’re lazy or don’t care. It’s simply that the skill of self-discipline—like any skill—needs to be learned and practiced.

As Jim Rohn wisely stated, “Success is nothing more than a few simple disciplines practiced every day.”

Without that early experience, it can take some extra effort to develop self-discipline later in life, but the journey is certainly worthwhile.

5) Flexibility and adaptability

On a brighter note, individuals who grew up with very little order and discipline exhibit remarkable flexibility and adaptability.

Having grown up without strict routines or rigid structures, they’ve learned to be comfortable amidst chaos and unpredictability.

This can make them more open to change and better able to adapt when unexpected circumstances arise.

Where others might get thrown off by sudden changes in plans or unforeseen obstacles, these individuals tend to take things in stride.

They’re used to navigating uncertainty and can find unique solutions to problems that others might not even consider.

6) A deep desire for freedom

The heart yearns for what it knows. For those who were raised in an environment of little order and discipline, this translates into a profound longing for freedom in their adult life.

I’ve seen this in many people I’ve encountered over the years. Their childhood was filled with the liberty to explore, make mistakes, and learn at their own pace.

It was a time when rules were few and personal expression was encouraged.

As they grow older, these individuals seek to recreate this sense of freedom. They may choose careers that offer flexibility, pursue creative passions, or even resist settling down too quickly.

This deep-seated desire for freedom isn’t something to be frowned upon.

Rather, it’s a testament to their unique upbringing and the values they’ve carried into adulthood.

It’s a trait that, while challenging at times, can lead to a life full of rich experiences and personal growth.

7) A tendency to question authority

I’ve always been the type to question things, especially authority. And I’ve noticed this is quite common among those of us who were raised without much order and discipline.

It’s not about being defiant or rebellious. Rather, it stems from an upbringing where we were encouraged to think for ourselves and not follow rules blindly.

We were allowed, even encouraged, to challenge the status quo.

This trait can sometimes cause friction in situations where compliance is expected. However, it also fosters critical thinking and encourages us to stand up for what we believe in.

Even though my questioning nature has gotten me into hot water a few times, I wouldn’t trade it for anything. It’s made me who I am today.

8) Spontaneity embrace

Individuals who grew up with little emphasis on order and discipline possess a natural knack for embracing spontaneity.

Without rigid routines or schedules shaping their early years, they tend to adapt more easily to unpredictability, handling last-minute changes or surprises with ease.

This can be seen in their adult life as they’re the ones who are up for spontaneous trips, unplanned adventures, or last-minute changes in plans.

They’re not easily thrown off by the unexpected but rather, they thrive in it.

Though this quality can sometimes be challenging in structured environments, it also brings a vibrant energy to life, making each day feel fresh and full of possibilities.

Ralph Waldo Emerson expressed this sentiment perfectly: “Life is a journey, not a destination.” Embracing spontaneity allows individuals to savor every moment along the way.

9) Open-mindedness

Growing up in an unstructured environment encourages open-mindedness. With fewer rules in place, children encounter diverse experiences and viewpoints.

This shapes adults who embrace new ideas, cultures, and ways of thinking.

They tend to be less judgmental and more accepting of differences, enabling them to view the world from multiple perspectives.

This ability makes them effective problem solvers and communicators.

However, this open-mindedness can occasionally bring about indecisiveness or a lack of firm convictions.

They may struggle to make decisions or stand their ground, as they recognize the value in all viewpoints.

Final reflection: It’s all about balance

At the end of the day, our upbringing shapes us in ways more profound than we often realize.

Growing up with little order and discipline can indeed result in certain distinct traits. But keep in mind, these traits aren’t set in stone.

The unpredictability, the struggle with self-discipline, the desire for freedom – they’re all part of a complex tapestry that makes us who we are.

And each trait, no matter how challenging, brings with it a unique strength.

What’s more, it’s important to remember that our past doesn’t define us. It influences us, yes, but we have the power to shape our own future.

We can learn from our experiences and strive to cultivate balance in our lives.

Whether you relate to these traits or know someone who does, let this understanding foster empathy and compassion.

After all, we’re all products of our past, navigating this complex journey called life.