People who were overly praised as a child usually develop these 9 traits later in life

Ethan Sterling by Ethan Sterling | July 8, 2024, 11:06 pm

There’s a significant impact left on a person who’s constantly showered with praise in their early years.

This impact isn’t always positive, and in many instances, it can result in certain traits becoming deeply ingrained in their character as they grow up.

Overpraising a child often leads to some unanticipated consequences that manifest later in life. And those of us who’ve been through it, can easily spot these traits in ourselves and others.

In this article, we’re diving into these characteristics. Below, check out the nine traits typically seen in individuals who were overly praised during their formative years.

1) Perfectionism

For many, a childhood filled with high praise can set an unrealistic standard for success in later years.

While it’s not inherently negative to strive for excellence, the pressure to be perfect can become a heavy burden to bear.

This constant need to maintain high standards often leads to perfectionism. It’s a trait commonly observed in those who were overpraised as children.

The desire to avoid criticism and disappointment can drive them to relentlessly pursue perfection. This can sometimes lead to undue stress, anxiety, and even burnout.

But don’t get me wrong. Perfectionism isn’t all bad. It can push us towards achieving our goals and maintaining high standards. The key lies in understanding and managing it effectively.

2) Difficulty handling criticism

I can personally vouch for this one.

Growing up, I was always the apple of my parents’ eyes. They praised every little thing I did, from tying my shoelaces to acing school tests.

On the surface, it was a great confidence booster, but it also created an illusion that I was infallible.

As I stepped into the real world, the reality check hit hard. The slightest critique at work or a simple disagreement with friends would leave me feeling attacked and defensive.

Over time, I realized that this stemmed from my inability to handle criticism, a trait that developed from the overpraise I received as a child.

It took some introspection and a lot of unlearning, but acknowledging this helped me grow personally and professionally.

So if you, like me, were excessively praised as a child, you might have experienced similar struggles in dealing with criticism.

3) Fear of failure

When kids receive excessive praise, they often start tying their sense of self-worth directly to their achievements. It sets them up for a fear of failure down the road.

Consider this: People who are really afraid of failing often end up sabotaging their own chances at success—almost like fulfilling their own prophecy.

That fear can be paralyzing. It holds them back from trying new things or taking risks, which ultimately limits their opportunities for personal growth and achievement.

As Confucius wisely said, “Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising every time we fail.”

4) Dependency on external validation

When children are constantly praised, they can become reliant on external validation to feel good about themselves.

This dependency often carries over into adulthood. They may find themselves seeking approval from others in everything they do, from their career choices to their personal relationships.

This need for validation can be limiting, as it may prevent them from pursuing their own passions and desires. It’s important to recognize this trait and work on developing a sense of self-validation.

5) High achievers but low self-esteem

Paradoxically, individuals who were excessively praised as children often grow up to be high achievers with low self-esteem.

Despite their accomplishments, they may constantly feel like they’re not good enough. This stems from the fear that they won’t live up to the expectations set by the constant praise they received in their childhood.

They might struggle with imposter syndrome, feeling like a fraud despite evident success. It’s crucial to understand these feelings and work on building a healthier self-image.

6) Inability to recognize personal strengths

One would think that a childhood filled with praise would lead to a strong sense of self-worth. But often, this is not the case.

Overpraised children may grow into adults who struggle to recognize their own strengths. The constant praise they received may have felt so generic that they find it hard to identify what they’re genuinely good at.

This can be a difficult journey, filled with self-doubt and uncertainty. But recognizing this can be the first step towards acknowledging your unique abilities and talents.  

7) Unhealthy competition

I remember how it felt growing up, always being compared to my siblings and peers. My parents were proud of my achievements, but it always felt like there was a constant need to outdo others.

This bred an unhealthy competitive streak in me. As an adult, I found myself constantly comparing my accomplishments to those of my peers, feeling inadequate if I didn’t measure up.

This relentless comparison and competition took its toll on my mental health. It took a lot of self-reflection and conscious effort to break free from this pattern and to truly understand that everyone’s journey is different.

8) Difficulty dealing with rejection

Rejection is a part of life. However, for those who were overly praised as children, dealing with rejection can be particularly challenging.

These individuals may have grown up in a protective bubble where they were always the best, and rejection was rare. When they face rejection later in life, it can trigger feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt.

It’s crucial to understand that rejection doesn’t define your worth. It’s simply a part of life’s journey and an opportunity for growth and learning.

9) Struggle with authenticity

At the heart of all this, individuals who were overly praised as kids often grapple with authenticity.

The continuous praise can blur their understanding of their true selves. As adults, they might struggle to express their genuine feelings, opinions, or desires, fearing they might disappoint others or fall short of expectations.

Authenticity is the cornerstone of meaningful relationships and self-growth. Embracing it can lead to greater self-understanding and richer life experiences.

From overpraised to overachiever: Rewrite your story

Imagine growing up constantly showered with praise, where every accomplishment is met with exaggerated applause and admiration. 

While it may seem like a dream scenario, being overly praised as a child can create unexpected challenges in adulthood.

It molds a mindset where self-worth becomes entwined with external validation—leading to a fear of failure and a reluctance to take risks. 

But here’s the thing: our past doesn’t dictate our future. 

Recognizing the impact of excessive praise is the first step towards liberation. It’s about reclaiming our sense of autonomy and rewriting the narrative of our lives.  

So, let’s break free from the shackles of overpraise and embark on a journey of self-discovery, resilience, and limitless possibility.