People who tend to fall in love too fast and too hard usually display these 7 behaviors (without realizing it)

Ethan Sterling by Ethan Sterling | October 21, 2024, 8:15 am

Have you ever found yourself head over heels for someone in record time?

Like, one moment you’re casually chatting, and the next, you’re picturing your future together—complete with matching coffee mugs and a shared Netflix account?

Well, Some people just have that tendency to fall fast and hard, diving into love like it’s a pool on a scorching summer day.

It’s exciting, thrilling, maybe a little terrifying… but hey, who needs time to think when you’re in the middle of a whirlwind romance, right?

Before you know it, you’re deep in feels-ville, and you don’t even realize you’re showing signs that you’re that person—the one who falls in love quicker than you can say “It’s not official, but…”

Don’t worry, we’ve all been there.

In fact, there are 7 little behaviors you might be displaying without even noticing!

So buckle up, lovebirds, because if you’re wondering why you always seem to fast-forward to the ‘all in’ phase, this one’s for you. 

1) They’re quick to create a romantic narrative

Ever noticed how some people can turn a simple coffee date into a romantic saga that rivals any Nicholas Sparks novel?

Well, they’re often the ones who fall in love quickly and intensely.

They tend to weave elaborate love stories in their minds based on small interactions and signs.

An exchanged glance becomes a “moment of connection”.

A casual touch transforms into an “electric spark”.

This isn’t necessarily a bad thing – after all, who doesn’t love a good love story?

Yet, it’s crucial to remember that real relationships are built on more than just perceived romantic narratives. In fact, they require:

  • Time and patience
  • True understanding
  • Genuine connection

2) They ignore red flags

I remember back in college, I fell head over heels for this charismatic girl.

Let’s call her Lisa.

From the moment I saw Lisa, I was smitten. She was vivacious, charming, and had an aura that lit up any room she entered.

I was so enamored by her that I overlooked some glaring red flags.

Lisa had a habit of canceling our plans last minute, often leaving me hanging.

She would also talk extensively about her exes and seemed to enjoy creating drama where there wasn’t any.

But in my love-struck state, I ignored these signs.

I rationalized them away, thinking she just needed time to change or that these were just minor flaws that love could overcome.

In retrospect, it’s clear that my quick and intense feelings for Lisa blinded me to the reality of the situation.

3) They mistake intensity for intimacy

You know what’s funny? We often confuse fireworks and whirlwinds for deep, meaningful connection.

I’ve been there, and, trust me, it’s easy to get swept up in the rush.

A whirlwind romance can feel exhilarating:

  • The fast-paced texts
  • The passionate dates
  • The profound late-night conversations

It feels like you’ve known each other for ages.

But here’s the kicker – real intimacy isn’t built overnight.

It takes time to truly know someone – their values, their quirks, their dreams, and their fears.

This isn’t something that can be fast-tracked by a few deep conversations or intense moments.

If you find yourself mistaking the intensity of your emotions for genuine intimacy, you might want to pump the brakes a little.

Allow the relationship to develop naturally over time.

That way, you’re less likely to crash and burn from the emotional exhaustion that often comes from falling too hard, too fast.

4) They’re often driven by fear

Here’s a hard pill to swallow – sometimes, the quickness and intensity with which we fall in love is more about fear than it is about love.

Some powerful motivators are:

All of these can push us to cling onto someone and fall in love rapidly, even if the fit isn’t quite right.

Instead of rushing into another romance, spending a little time working on self-love and self-acceptance could be beneficial.

It’s essential to fall in love with the person, not the idea of being in a relationship.

Love should be a choice, not a frantic race against loneliness.

5) They often have an idealistic view of love

Did you know psychologists have found a correlation between idealizing love and falling for someone quickly?

It’s true. People who possess an idealistic view of love often fall hard and fast.

They believe in soulmates, love at first sight, and happily ever after.

While there’s nothing wrong with being a romantic at heart, too much idealization can cloud our judgment.

We forget that love isn’t just about grand gestures and passionate declarations.

It’s also about compromise, understanding, patience, and sometimes, even mundane moments.

So if you’re someone who tends to idealize love, be cautious.

It’s beautiful to believe in fairy tales, but remember that real love is often more complex and rewarding than any storybook romance.

6) They equate love with self-worth

Let’s take a moment to acknowledge something – it’s human to seek validation and acceptance from those we love.

But it becomes a problem when we start equating our self-worth with being loved.

When you fall in love quickly and intensely, it’s easy to lose yourself in the process.

You might start to believe that being loved by someone else validates your worthiness.

However, it’s essential to remember that your worth isn’t determined by someone else’s feelings for you.

You are valuable and deserving of love, irrespective of your relationship status.

7) They’re often in love with the idea of love

This is perhaps the most important thing to understand – falling in love too quickly and too hard often indicates that you’re in love with the idea of love, rather than the person themselves.

When you’re in love with love, it’s easy to overlook flaws, ignore red flags, and rush into relationships.

You get swept up in the excitement, the romance, and the euphoria that comes with new love.

But real love is about seeing and accepting someone for who they truly are, not just the romanticized version you’ve created in your head. 

Wrapping it up

if any of these 7 signs hit a little too close to home, don’t worry, you’re not the only one out there falling in love like it’s an Olympic sport!

Sure, wearing your heart on your sleeve may lead to some wild emotional rollercoasters, but let’s face it—what’s life without a little thrill?

You just might need a helmet (or at least a few boundaries) to soften the impact.

The truth is, falling in love fast and hard doesn’t make you reckless—it makes you passionate.

You feel everything deeply, and while that can sometimes land you in complicated situations, it also gives you incredible stories, unforgettable moments, and a heart that loves fiercely.

So, keep being your love-struck self, but maybe try to pace yourself a little.

After all, there’s no rush to the finish line when it comes to matters of the heart.

Who knows? That steady love you’re looking for might just be waiting when you slow down to catch your breath.