What exactly does it take to be happy…and stay happy in life? 

It seems like a simple question, but the answer can be quite tricky. Everywhere we look, there’s advice thrown at us.

From books and TV shows to social media feeds full of life coaches telling us how to find joy. 

It’s a lot, isn’t it? Sometimes, it feels like you need a secret map or a special key to unlock happiness. 

I don’t know about you, but I always look to psychology for the best insights.

And according to psychology, being happy is mainly about the habits we keep. 

And here’s the kicker: these habits are surprisingly straightforward and accessible to all of us. 

Curious about what they are and how you can make them part of your life?

Let’s explore these habits together and find out how simple it can be to add a bit more happiness to our days.

1) Nurture your relationships

I’ll start with the most important factor that drives happiness – relationships. 

Back in 1938, the Harvard Study of Adult Development started following the lives of 724 people to find out what makes a person happy and healthy. 

This massive study spanned over nine decades and three generations, providing us with a wealth of data about what it truly means to live a fulfilled life. 

The conclusion?

It wasn’t wealth, fame, or hard work that predicted how well people were doing in their 80s, but rather the quality of their relationships.

More recently, author Dan Buettner investigated the “Blue Zones”, the communities in the world with the longest-living people.

Across these communities, social support was always a factor in the people’s happiness. 

Every day, they’d make an effort to connect with someone else.

This evidence speaks volumes about the human need for connection.

It’s a reminder that investing in our relationships can pay off in more ways than one. 

2) Practice kindness every single day

Happiness is an inside job, true, but strangely, it involves making other people happy. 

Does that  make sense to you? Well, as I mentioned in my previous point, other people matter, especially when it comes to staying happy. 

That’s what the research says too – according to the authors of the study, “Happiness comes from trying to make others feel good, rather than oneself.”

People who stay happy know this so well, and that’s why they always do something nice for someone else.

They perform random acts of kindness.

 Even when they’re having a bad day.

In fact, it’s one of their go-to strategies to lift themselves up out of the blues.

It sounds counterintuitive, but in my experience, it really does work! 

3) Practice gratitude

The beautiful thing about kindness is that it’s closely connected to gratitude.

These two kinda come hand in hand, like two sides of the same coin. 

When we’re kind to others, we often find ourselves feeling grateful for the opportunity to make a difference in someone’s life. 

And when we’re grateful, it’s so much easier to extend kindness, even in small ways, because we’re aware of the good things in our own lives. 

This cycle of kindness and gratitude creates a softer outlook on life, which definitely eases the hardships we face.

People who stay happy tend to see the good stuff in their lives.

They focus on what’s going right, instead of what’s wrong, so their brain gets a literal happiness boost, thanks to the release of serotonin and dopamine, the brain’s natural feel-good chemicals. 

Plus, being grateful helps them make stronger connections with friends and family, making everyone a bit happier.

4) Look for life’s little gifts

The natural consequence of being grateful is that we learn to look at life through a positive lens. 

We see – and look for – life’s little gifts and wonders, so we’re able to cultivate a sense of awe.

Which means, we’d be less prone to getting jaded and taking things for granted. 

That sense of awe is crucial for staying happy in life.

According to life coach Julie Leonard: “It makes us feel we are part of something greater than ourselves. It therefore shifts our attention away from ourselves and shifts our perspective. It can make us see our problems and challenges differently by putting them into perspective. “

Not only that, but research shows that feeling awe leads us to be kinder and more generous towards others. 

Isn’t that a wonderful chain of events?

These habits build upon one another – you do one, and then you just naturally start developing the others. 

5) Hang out with happy people

Did you ever think of happiness as something contagious, like a virus?

It absolutely is, and you can catch it if you keep the right kind of company!

There’s a sound psychological principle behind this called “emotional contagion”.

It refers to how we tend to copy the emotions and behaviors of the people around us. 

If someone’s happy, you’re bound to “catch” that.

So I suggest surrounding yourself with people who choose to be positive in life.

It’s going to make a huge impact on your own happiness. 

6) Move your body

We already know that movement is essential to keep our bodies healthy. But did you know that it’s also a potent recipe for happiness? 

Yes, there’s a definite link between the two.

You see, regular physical activity releases endorphins, those feel-good chemicals in our brain that act like natural painkillers and mood elevators. 

But it goes deeper than that.

Exercise can be a meditation in motion, helping us find clarity, reduce stress, and improve our sleep patterns. 

It connects us with our physical selves in a profound way, grounding us in the present moment and reminding us of our strength and resilience. 

Whether it’s a brisk walk, a dance class, or a yoga session, finding joy in movement is a common thread among happy people.

7) Meditate

Speaking of meditation, this is another habit that people who stay happy share. 

Many scientific studies have shown the positive impact of meditation on happiness.

One study found, for example, that the Loving Kindness Meditation (LKM) produces positive emotions that increase over time.

I can vouch for this myself.

As a practitioner of this meditative practice, I can say that it has done wonders for my overall happiness and satisfaction with life. 

By regularly dedicating time to meditate, I’ve found a valuable tool for handling life’s stresses and challenges with a more peaceful and open heart. 

It’s a practice that enriches my own life, and also allows me to be more positive and empathetic towards others. 

This brings me to my next point…

8) Practice self-compassion

This is perhaps the area where meditation has really helped me.

LKM focuses on cultivating feelings of unconditional kindness and compassion towards oneself and (consequently) others.

And that’s important if you want to stay happy.

Because let’s face it, many of us struggle with accepting our flaws, don’t we?

We engage in negative self-talk and beat ourselves up over our mistakes. 

People who stay happy don’t waste their energy on that. Just as they’re kind to others, they’re kind to themselves, too. 

According to Very Well Mind: “In practicing self-compassion, you may find that interactions with others soften and become less reactive, you may find yourself willing to move forward in an area that you previously felt a bit stuck. In fact, you may begin experiencing happiness as you seek out new, healthy ways of living and relating to yourself.”

Aside from practicing LKM and avoiding negative self-talk, here are several other ways to practice self-compassion: 

• Take breaks when you’re feeling overwhelmed or stressed
• Care for your body – eat nutritious food, exercise, and get enough sleep
• Set boundaries and say no to requests that overextend your energy and time
• Celebrate your successes, no matter how small
• Seek support when you need it
• Engage in activities you enjoy

9) Have a sense of purpose

Finally, a happy life is a meaningful life.

That’s why people who stay happy make sure that they have a sense of purpose. 

Psychologists say that a sense of purpose is linked to higher levels of happiness and life satisfaction. 

It’s easy to see why. Consider all the things that a sense of purpose brings with it: 

• Hope and optimism
• Learning and growth
• A tendency to make healthier life choices
• A sense that you contribute to something you care about

And I should note – a reason to jump out of bed every morning feeling motivated. All of that adds up to a life that’s vibrant and happy!