The words we pick can actually reveal a ton about how we see ourselves. And for those feeling a little low on the self-esteem scale, some phrases pop up more often than not.

Sit back, relax, and let’s uncover these 10 common phrases.

Remember though, this isn’t about finger-pointing or making anyone feel down. It’s about getting to know ourselves and others a little better.

And hey, if you catch yourself using some of these phrases, don’t sweat it – recognizing it is the first step towards change.

This is going to be quite the eye-opener!

1) “I’m sorry”

The classic “I’m sorry.”

Now, don’t get us wrong – there’s nothing wrong with apologizing when you’ve actually done something wrong. It’s a sign of maturity and respect.

But people with low self-esteem tend to overuse this phrase.

If you’re saying sorry for things that aren’t your fault, or for simply existing, then it’s a red flag.

This could be a sign that you’re feeling guilty for taking up space or expressing your needs, which is often linked to low self-esteem.

Stop and think. Were you really in the wrong? Or are you just defaulting to “I’m sorry” because you’re used to blaming yourself?

Understanding this can be a big step towards building your self-esteem.

2) “I’m not sure, but…”

It’s a way of cushioning an opinion or idea, a sort of safety net in case the other person disagrees or dismisses it.

But here’s the thing:

Your thoughts and ideas are valid. You don’t need to cushion them or make them seem smaller than they are. It’s perfectly okay to state your opinion confidently.

If you’re regularly using this phrase, it might be time to consider why. Are you scared of criticism? Or do you believe your ideas aren’t good enough?

Unpacking these feelings can help you build confidence and let your ideas stand tall, just as they should.

3) “It’s probably stupid, but…”

Oh boy, have I been guilty of this one.

This is a phrase I used to use a lot. It’s another way of minimizing our thoughts and ideas, pre-emptively putting them down before anyone else can.

I remember when I was working on a project with my team, and I had an idea that I thought was pretty good.

But instead of just saying it, I started with, “This is probably stupid, but…”.

The moment the words left my mouth, I realized what I was doing – underestimating myself.

Using this phrase can be a sign that you’re afraid of judgement or rejection.

But it’s essential to remember that every idea has value, even if it’s not the final solution. Give your thoughts the respect they deserve.

You might be surprised at how others react when you present your ideas confidently.

4) “I can’t do it”

It’s a self-limiting statement that instantly shuts down possibilities before even giving them a chance.

Here’s an interesting fact:

People who often use negative, self-limiting statements tend to have lower self-esteem than those who use positive affirmations.

Try swapping it with “I’ll try.” This small shift in language can help open up possibilities and boost your confidence over time.

5) “I’m just lucky”

“I’m just lucky” is a phrase that tugs at my heartstrings every time I hear it. It’s often used by individuals with low self-esteem when they achieve something, instead of acknowledging their hard work and talent.

It’s as if they believe they don’t deserve the success they’ve achieved, and they attribute it to luck instead of their own abilities.

This, my friends, is a classic sign of something called impostor syndrome, which is often linked to low self-esteem.

Remind yourself that you’ve worked hard for your success. You’re more than deserving of it. It’s not just luck – it’s you, your effort, your dedication, and yes, your talent. Celebrate that.

6) “I should have done better”

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve caught myself saying this phrase. It’s a tricky one because, on the surface, it seems like a sign of ambition or high standards.

But underneath, it can often hide feelings of low self-esteem.

For instance, I remember getting a promotion at work, a moment that should have been purely joyous.

But instead of celebrating, I found myself saying, “I should have done better. I could have gotten here faster.”

This phrase suggests that no matter what we achieve, it’s never enough. We’re always falling short of our own expectations. The truth is, we’re often our own harshest critics.

Take a moment to reflect.

You’re doing better than you think, and it’s okay to celebrate your achievements without adding a ‘but’ at the end.

You deserve to recognize your progress, not just where you think you’re lacking.

7) “I don’t matter”

Hearing someone say “I don’t matter” is like a punch to the gut. It’s raw, it’s painful, and it’s incredibly revealing. It’s a belief that one’s presence, thoughts, or feelings have no value or impact.

And let me tell you something – it couldn’t be further from the truth. Each one of us matters. Our thoughts, our feelings, our existence – they all matter.

If you ever find these words slipping from your lips, please pause. You are not insignificant. You are not unimportant. Your voice matters, your thoughts matter, your feelings matter – you matter.

It might take time to fully believe this, and that’s okay. Healing and growth take time.

8) “I’m not good enough”

This is a phrase that is unfortunately all too common. It’s reflecting a belief that we’re less than we should be or that we’re somehow failing.

Here’s an interesting fact:

I have heard more than ten of my friends say this. The truth is that many of us think that way about ourselves.

So, if you’re often telling yourself that you’re not good enough, remember you’re not alone.

The feeling of not being good enough can be overwhelming, but it’s important to challenge this belief.

Each one of us is different, with our own unique set of strengths and weaknesses. Embrace who you are, because you are enough just as you are.

9) “Everyone else is better”

I’ve found myself thinking this way more times than I’d like to admit. It’s a phrase that reflects comparison, a dangerous game that can seriously harm our self-esteem.

I remember once scrolling through social media and seeing the success of my peers – promotions, travel, achievements.

Instead of being happy for them, I found myself thinking, “Everyone else is doing better than me.”

But here’s what I learned:

Comparison is the thief of joy. The truth is, we’re all on our own unique journey with ups and downs.

Just because someone else’s life looks perfect on the outside, doesn’t mean it is.

Try to focus on your own progress instead of comparing it to others.

Celebrate your achievements, no matter how small they may seem in comparison. Your journey is about you, not anyone else.

10) “I’m a failure”

This phrase is as honest and raw as it gets. It’s a direct reflection of an individual feeling they’re not succeeding in life or certain aspects of it. It’s a cry for help and understanding.

Let me tell you.

Failure is not a person, it’s an event. It’s a single point in time, not a life sentence. You are not a failure.

You might have experienced failures, like we all have because that’s part of being human. But experiencing failure doesn’t make you one.

Failure is not definitive of who you are. It’s simply part of your journey towards success, growth, and learning.

You are more than your failures; you’re a person who is growing, learning, and most importantly – persevering.