People who grew up sheltered usually display these 7 traits later in life (without realizing it)
Ever wonder how your childhood experiences shape who you are today?
Growing up sheltered can have a bigger impact than you might think. It leaves a mark that often shows up in adulthood, sometimes without us even realizing it.
These seven traits, rooted in our early years, tend to stick around and influence how we navigate the world as grown-ups.
Without further ado, let’s dive into the subtle yet powerful ways our upbringing continues to shape our lives.
1) Difficulty in decision-making
Growing up sheltered often meant having most decisions made for you, leaving little room for independent choice. As an adult, this can lead to struggles with decision-making, whether it’s navigating major life choices or simple everyday decisions.
Making decisions involves assessing situations, considering options, and weighing outcomes. For sheltered individuals, these skills may be less developed due to lack of practice. Feeling overwhelmed or anxious when faced with decisions, big or small, is common.
The good news is, decision-making is a skill that improves with practice. Start by making small decisions daily, gradually working up to larger ones. Embrace mistakes as part of the learning process—it’s all about progress, not perfection.
2) Tendency towards caution and risk aversion
Growing up in a sheltered environment tends to make one more cautious and risk-averse. In such a protective setting, potential dangers are often shielded, leading to a natural inclination to avoid risks and uncertain situations.
As an adult, this inclination can limit your willingness to step out of your comfort zone. You may prefer sticking to familiar paths and routines. However, taking calculated risks is often essential for achieving goals and personal development.
While being cautious can be beneficial for safety, it’s crucial to learn to assess risks realistically. Don’t let fear prevent you from seizing opportunities for growth and advancement.
3) Struggle with understanding and setting personal boundaries
Growing up in a sheltered environment often makes it tough to grasp and establish personal boundaries.
In such settings, where decisions are typically made by parents or caregivers, understanding where your autonomy begins and ends can be a bit fuzzy, leading to challenges later in life.
Yet, boundaries are vital in adult relationships, both personally and professionally. They define where one person’s rights and responsibilities start and another’s end, fostering respect, preventing manipulation, and ensuring mutual understanding.
Recognizing this pattern is the first step to change. Learning to set boundaries involves self-awareness, clear communication, and sometimes seeking support from a therapist or counselor.
4) Lack of street-smarts
It’s pretty common for folks who had a sheltered upbringing to lack street-smarts. You know, that knack for handling everyday stuff that comes your way.
Street-smarts usually come from facing a range of experiences and overcoming challenges—things that might’ve been in short supply if you grew up sheltered.
This lack of street-smarts might show up as being a bit too trusting, struggling in social situations, or feeling unprepared for real-life hurdles. Now, these traits aren’t necessarily bad, but they can leave you feeling a bit vulnerable or out of your depth at times.
But hey, it’s never too late to pick up some street-smarts. You can start by getting out there, trying new things, learning from slip-ups, and just paying attention to what’s happening around you.
5) Tendency to internalize failure
Another thing we often see in folks who grew up sheltered is how they tend to take failure pretty hard.
When you’re shielded from making mistakes all the time, you kinda start expecting perfection from yourself. So, when you mess up, you end up being super tough on yourself, seeing it as some kind of personal flaw instead of a chance to learn.
This whole internalizing failure thing can really mess with your head—like, it can make you feel pretty down on yourself, anxious, or even depressed. But here’s the deal: everyone screws up sometimes. It’s just part of being human.
The trick is to start seeing those slip-ups as opportunities to grow and learn. Shifting to a mindset where you’re all about growth can really help you see the silver lining in tough times and handle life’s curveballs a bit better.
6) Struggle with social skills
If you grew up in a sheltered environment, social situations might not always feel like your strong suit. I mean, think about it—social skills usually come from mixing it up with all sorts of people, and that might’ve been kinda limited if you were sheltered.
So, this struggle might show up as finding small talk tricky, missing social cues, or even having a tough time building and keeping relationships. And hey, your comfort zone in social stuff might be a bit snug, too—you know, sticking to what you know.
But here’s the thing: getting better at this stuff takes time. You gotta push yourself out of that cozy zone, watch how others do it, and learn from what happens. And feeling a bit awkward at first? Totally normal.
7) Difficulty in handling criticism
Here’s the last thing we’re diving into: dealing with criticism.
Folks who grew up sheltered might not have had a lot of negative feedback thrown their way. So, when they do face criticism in adulthood, it can really throw them for a loop.
Criticism, whether it’s meant to help or not, can feel like a punch to the gut, making you doubt yourself and feel pretty defensive. But here’s the scoop: everybody gets criticized sometimes, and it’s actually a chance to learn and grow.
The trick is to take that feedback on board without letting it mess with your head. It’s about realizing that your worth as a person isn’t tied to the stuff that’s being criticized.
Working on these traits
If you see these traits in yourself, know this: they’re not set in stone. They’re just habits that have formed over time, and like any habits, they can be changed.
Change starts with accepting where you’re coming from. Understanding how your past has shaped you is key. Once you’ve got a handle on that, you can start making moves to switch things up.
That might mean setting small goals, pushing yourself out of your comfort zone, or reaching out for some pro help like counseling. And hey, be patient with yourself—it’s a journey, not a sprint.
Working on yourself isn’t always a walk in the park, but it’s worth it. And remember, it’s not about blaming your past—it’s about learning from it and using that knowledge to build a better future.