People who feel drained from faking it all the time usually show these 8 behaviors
There’s a toll taken on those who constantly feel the need to put on a facade.
Faking it all the time is not only mentally exhausting, it’s also emotionally draining. And it’s not always easy to spot, as people often become experts at hiding their true feelings.
However, there are subtle signs that can give them away. These are often observed as certain behaviors, eight of which we’ll delve into in this article.
Welcome to “People who feel drained from faking it all the time usually show these 8 behaviors”. We’ll explore these tell-tale signs and hopefully, shed some light on this hidden struggle.
1) Inconsistency in behavior
Being authentic is about consistency in behavior, beliefs, and values.
When someone is constantly pretending to be someone they’re not, inconsistencies begin to surface.
One day they might be overly enthusiastic and the next, completely disinterested. They may show an interest in things they typically wouldn’t or react to situations in ways that are out of character.
This is one of the first signs that a person could be emotionally drained from faking it all the time. It’s a subtle indicator but with a keen eye, you can spot it.
Remember though, everyone has off days. So, don’t jump to conclusions based on isolated incidents. Consistent inconsistency is what you’re looking for here.
2) They withdraw socially
I’ve seen this behavior in a close friend of mine.
For a while, she seemed to be the life of every party, always bubbly and outgoing. But over time, I noticed her enthusiasm began to wane.
She started declining invitations to hang out and would often cancel plans at the last minute. It wasn’t like her to be so reclusive. When I finally managed to have an honest conversation with her about it, she admitted to feeling drained from constantly trying to be the ‘fun’ person everyone expected her to be.
This withdrawal from social interactions was a clear sign that she was exhausted from putting up a facade. It’s not that she didn’t enjoy hanging out with friends, she was just tired of pretending to be someone she wasn’t.
This behavior can often be a telling sign of someone who is emotionally drained from faking it all the time.
3) Increased irritability
When someone is constantly putting on a front, it can lead to a lot of pent-up frustration and resentment. This emotional pressure often manifests itself as increased irritability.
According to a study done by the Department of Psychology at the University of Toronto, individuals who suppress their true feelings experience more stress, which in turn leads to increased irritability.
It’s like keeping a lid on a pressure cooker – eventually, it’s going to blow. The person might snap at the smallest things or show a general lack of patience. It’s not because they are inherently irritable, but because they’re tired of suppressing their true feelings.
4) They appear emotionally distant
A person who is drained from keeping up a facade often disconnects emotionally. It’s a protective mechanism to avoid the emotional strain of continuing to pretend.
They may seem disengaged, aloof, or detached during conversations. It’s not that they don’t care, but rather they’re conserving their emotional energy by not investing too much of it in their interactions.
This emotional distance is often misconstrued as coldness or indifference, but it’s actually a sign of emotional exhaustion resulting from constantly faking it.
5) They hide their true feelings
Imagine having a day where you’re feeling down, but you have to put on a brave face and pretend everything is fine. Now, imagine doing that every single day.
People who constantly fake it often get so good at hiding their real emotions that they become almost invisible to others. They smile when they want to cry, laugh when they want to scream, and nod when they want to disagree.
It’s a heartbreaking existence, one that requires tremendous emotional strength. Spotting this behavior isn’t easy, but if you notice someone always putting up a happy front, no matter what, it may be a sign they’re emotionally drained from faking it all the time.
6) They struggle with self-esteem
Growing up, I was always the shy kid in class. To counter this, I started pretending to be confident and outgoing. It worked for a while, people started seeing me as a confident person.
But beneath the surface, I was still that same shy kid. The constant act began to eat away at my self-esteem. I felt like a fraud, and that if people knew the real me, they wouldn’t like me.
Someone constantly pretending to be someone else may struggle with self-esteem issues. They might feel that their real selves aren’t good enough, and this can take a serious toll on their self-worth over time. It’s a difficult cycle to break, but recognizing it is the first step towards healing.
7) They’re prone to burnout
Maintaining a constant facade is like running a marathon without any breaks. It’s mentally and emotionally exhausting, and over time, it can lead to burnout.
Burnout is a state of chronic physical and mental exhaustion. It’s more than just feeling tired; it’s a deep-seated sense of fatigue that doesn’t go away with rest.
If you notice someone constantly feeling tired or complaining of being burnt out, despite adequate rest, they could be draining their energy reserves by constantly pretending to be someone they’re not. It’s important to address this issue before it escalates into serious health problems.
8) They rarely express personal opinions
When a person is constantly faking it, they often suppress their personal opinions to avoid conflict or to seem more agreeable.
They may always go along with what others say or do, even when it goes against their personal beliefs or preferences. It’s as though they’re playing a character in a play, always following the script and never deviating from it.
This is perhaps the most damaging behavior. Because by not expressing their true thoughts and feelings, they’re denying themselves the right to be who they really are. It’s important for their well-being to rediscover their voice and start standing up for their own opinions.
Final reflection: It’s a call for empathy
Understanding the complexities of human behavior isn’t always straightforward, especially when it comes to those who are constantly grappling with the strain of pretending.
One key takeaway from a study by the American Psychological Association is that chronic role-playing can lead to severe emotional exhaustion and even burnout. This isn’t merely an anecdotal observation, but a scientifically-backed fact.
For those constantly in a state of pretense, they’re not just dealing with a personality quirk. They’re grappling with a tremendous emotional load that takes a toll on their well-being.
Recognizing these signs in ourselves and others isn’t about assigning blame or feeling guilty. It’s about fostering empathy, understanding and ultimately, opening doors to more authentic interactions.
As we navigate our lives, let’s remember that everyone’s experience is unique. And for those who feel drained from faking it all the time, perhaps what they need most is a safe space to simply be themselves.

