People who constantly seek new experiences but never feel satisfied often display these 7 behaviors

Tina Fey by Tina Fey | September 29, 2024, 7:25 am

Novelty is exciting.

After all, we don’t buy each other gifts for nothing. It is often the thrill of receiving a new and unexpected present that makes our day.

However, there is such a thing as too much novelty. If you always chase the next high, you might soon find that you’re on a hamster wheel that never stops. It just keeps on turning.

So, without further ado…

People who constantly seek new experiences but never feel satisfied often display these 7 behaviors.

1) They are always chasing after short dopamine boosts

“Why are some people addicted to novelty,” you might ask?

Dopamine is your answer.

Based on research, “Novel stimuli excite dopamine neurons and activate brain regions receiving dopaminergic input.” Since dopamine makes us feel good – it’s what motivates us to go after our goals and feel satisfied once we reach them – it’s actually pretty easy to get addicted to it.

Just think of how you feel when a new notification pops up on your phone or when you complete a quest in a video game.

It’s good, isn’t it?

Unfortunately, some people may get stuck in that cycle of short dopamine boosts, which is why they never feel satisfied with what they have at present.

They continually get the urge to go after something new. Something more.

As a result, they might:

  • Be always on their phone
  • Constantly buy flight tickets to new destinations
  • Change partners very often
  • Seek adrenaline-filled experiences
  • Gamble
  • Switch between hobbies

Please note that this is only a general description that may differ based on the person’s individual circumstances. For instance, some of the examples above could be applicable to ADHD.

2) They struggle to stay in the present moment

The way I see it, people who constantly seek new experiences are romantics at heart.

They imagine themselves at a specific holiday destination or in a particular period of their life and they idealize the hell out of that image.

“Everything will be so good,” they think. “That’s when I’ll be really happy. Ahh, I can’t wait!”

The issue is that once they finally do reach their goal, the satisfaction wears off pretty quickly, and all that’s left is…

Yep. The present moment.

It’s like running from your own shadow.

No matter how far you go, you eventually have to accept the fact that the present moment is all you will ever have, that nothing is ever perfect, and that the scenario you made up in your head will never come true in the exact way you imagined.

Happiness is in the now.

Take it or leave it.

3) They operate from a scarcity mindset

If you look at a novelty addict’s behavior closely, you’ll notice that it’s rooted in a scarcity mindset.

Contrary to an abundance mindset, a scarcity mindset is all about the belief that there is a limited amount of resources, time, and energy, and that you ought to do your best to decrease your lack.

That phrase – “decrease your lack” – is vital.

For people with a scarcity mindset, life isn’t about acknowledging all that they already have and slowly working on increasing that abundant energy. It’s about seeing how little they have and how much they still want to get their hands on.

Scarcity equals never having enough.

Abundance equals always having enough.

Ironically, it is precisely the belief that you always have enough that can help you attract more of the good things in life.

As Oprah Winfrey once said: “Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough.”

4) They give up way too quickly

Another common characteristic that people who constantly seek new experiences share is…

Impatience.

One of my friends who falls into this category once told me, “I just want it all now! It’s so frustrating that I have to wait.”

But that’s precisely the problem. He felt like his life was all about moving toward a specific milestone, and the journey itself was just a “boring wait”.

The thing is, though… Most of our lives take place in those periods between large milestones. If you don’t find a way to enjoy the journey, 90% of your existence will be summarized as “ugh” because you’ll be constantly waiting to experience something better.

It’s completely unsustainable.

This is why it’s vital that people who always chase after novelty learn to persevere. Too often, they give up too quickly and move on to another hobby, project, or friend group.

But the key to happiness isn’t always elsewhere. Sometimes, it’s at the same spot as you – you’ve just got to dig a little deeper.

5) They are afraid of forming genuine connections with others

This one doesn’t necessarily apply to all novelty-seekers out there, but if you’re addicted to the thrill of new experiences and also have an avoidant attachment style, you might find this section relatable.

Remember the friend I mentioned above?

He loved to form new friendships with people on the internet from all parts of the world.

The problem was that he enjoyed the thrill of having a new friend much more than the deep sense of understanding that is built during a long-term friendship, and so his connections were always fleeting.

Every few months, he had a new friend that he texted with constantly, only for things to slowly fizzle out.

Lo and behold, he also struggled in the realm of romance.

When we spoke about it in more depth, it turned out that he was really scared of opening himself up and displaying vulnerability, which is why most of his friendships and relationships never worked out.

Once his connections went beyond surface-level interactions, he got overwhelmed by his fear and quickly returned to what he liked best: finding new friends.

6) They display high tolerance to risk

According to Psychology Today, “Thrill-seekers aren’t motivated by danger. They’re driven to conquer new challenges and soak up every experience life has to offer—and they simply don’t let danger dissuade them. Therefore, they may not fear the risks that accompany activities like mountaineering, cliff diving, gambling….”

Many – not all – people who are constantly chasing new experiences will display what others perceive as recklessness.

As explained above, this isn’t necessarily because they love danger. It’s because they don’t view danger as something that would pose an obstacle.

The American aviator Amelia Earheart described it very accurately when she said, “The fears are paper tigers. You can do anything you decide to do.”

7) They are often running away from themselves

Do you know what new experiences, people, and things offer us?

Distraction. A temporary feeling of joy.

And no one loves this more than people who haven’t yet come to hug all their demons and learn to love themselves in their entirety.

Those of us who are still afraid of our shadows, those who are running from a past they can’t shake, those who are terrified to open up – those are exactly the kinds of people who might turn to novelty as a form of escapism.

However, the inherent nature of novelty is precisely that it is only ever new and therefore never lasts.

As a result, people find themselves in a perpetual cycle of short bursts of satisfaction and long periods of longing.

Rinse and repeat.

The fact of the matter is that you simply can’t escape from your own sense of self.

No matter where you go, no matter how many new friends you make or how many video games you play, the core issue will still be there, waiting to be addressed and resolved.

And once you do…

You might find that the present moment truly is quite a beautiful place to be.

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