People who constantly put others first often sacrifice these 9 things (without realizing it)

Mia Zhang by Mia Zhang | July 12, 2024, 8:12 pm

Putting others first is a noble trait, and many of us do it without giving it a second thought.

We’re often so focused on helping others that we neglect our own needs.

But what happens when this selflessness becomes a constant habit?

Sometimes, we end up sacrificing certain things without even realizing it.

In this article, I’ll shed light on the 9 things that people who consistently prioritize others often unknowingly give up. 

1) Personal health

It’s easy to forget about your own wellbeing when you’re constantly looking out for others.

The concern for others may lead you to skip meals, miss out on sleep, or even ignore signs of illness because you’re too focused on helping someone else.

Prioritizing others can also lead to stress and anxiety, as you take on their problems and worries as your own.

We all know that maintaining good health is essential – it allows us to function at our best, both physically and mentally.

But, when we’re constantly putting others first, our health often takes a backseat.

Don’t get me wrong – helping others is an admirable quality.

But remember, it’s important to take care of your own health too.

Without it, you won’t be able to help others effectively in the long run.

2) Personal time

I’m sure we’ve all been there – our calendar is packed, but a friend or family member needs our help and we just can’t say no.

I recall a time when I was planning to have a quiet weekend after a hectic work week.

Just as I started to unwind, a friend called.

She was going through a tough time and needed someone to talk to.

Of course, I was there for her.

We talked for hours and by the time we hung up, my entire day was gone.

This wasn’t a one-off incident either.

It happened quite often.

While it’s fulfilling to be there for others in their time of need, it’s also important to remember that your time is valuable too.

We all need downtime to relax, pursue hobbies, or simply do nothing.

It’s essential for our mental health.

Always putting others first can eat into this personal time, leaving you feeling drained and overworked.

It’s okay to say no sometimes and take time for yourself.

3) Financial stability

Supporting others emotionally can sometimes translate into financial support too.

Whether it’s lending money to a friend in need or picking up the dinner bill more often than not, these costs add up over time.

While it’s good to be generous, remember that your financial stability is important too.

Constantly prioritizing others’ financial needs over your own can derail your savings goals and even lead to financial stress.

It’s essential to strike a balance between helping others and maintaining your own financial health.

4) Career advancement

When we’re constantly prioritizing others, our professional goals can sometimes take a backseat.

Maybe you’ve found yourself staying late at work to help a colleague finish a project, even if it means missing out on networking events or professional development opportunities.

Or perhaps you’re always the one to take on extra tasks because nobody else wants to, even though it’s not really your job.

While team spirit and willingness to help are great qualities, it’s important to remember that your career growth matters too.

If you’re constantly putting others first at work, you might be missing out on opportunities to advance in your career or even sacrificing your work-life balance.

Don’t forget to advocate for yourself and your own professional needs.

5) Self-growth and development

You might skip a class you’ve been taking because a friend needs your help.

Or perhaps you miss out on pursuing a new hobby or interest because you’re too busy assisting others.

Personal growth and development are integral parts of our lives.

They allow us to learn new skills, gain knowledge, and broaden our horizons.

If you’re constantly prioritizing others, you may be inadvertently stunting your own growth.

Take the time to invest in yourself and your own interests.

It’s crucial for your self-esteem and overall happiness.

6) Genuine relationships

We may sometimes attract people who take advantage of our giving nature.

They might come to expect our selflessness as a given, rather than appreciating it for the generous act it is.

This can lead to one-sided relationships where we’re always the giver, and they’re always the taker.

These kinds of relationships can be emotionally draining and damaging to our sense of self-worth.

It’s heartbreaking to realize that someone you care about is only in your life because of what you can do for them, rather than who you are as a person.

You deserve to be surrounded by people who value and appreciate you for who you are, not just what you can do for them.

7) Self-identity

In the hustle and bustle of catering to everyone else’s needs, it’s easy to lose sight of who we are.

I remember a time when I found myself in a room full of people I cared about, yet I felt completely lost.

I had spent so much time and energy caring for them that I had forgotten to take care of myself.

I had lost touch with my own passions, interests, and essentially, my identity.

It was a wake-up call.

I realized that while it’s important to be there for others, it’s equally important to stay connected with ourselves.

When we’re always putting others first, we might start defining our worth by how much we can do for others.

This can lead to losing touch with our own values, passions, and aspirations.

We must nurture our own identity just as much as we nurture our relationships with others.

8) Mental peace

Constantly attending to the needs of others can become mentally exhausting.

When we’re always focused on others’ problems and concerns, it can lead to increased stress and anxiety.

We might find ourselves constantly worrying about them, even when we should be focusing on our own lives.

This constant state of concern can rob us of our mental peace.

We might find it hard to relax or unwind because our mind is always occupied with the worries and needs of others.

It’s important to understand that while it’s good to empathize with others, we shouldn’t let their problems consume us.

Take time for self-care and relaxation. 

9) Self-love and appreciation

When we’re always focused on others, we might start to undervalue our own worth.

We might start believing that our value lies in what we can do for others, rather than who we are as individuals.

Self-love and self-appreciation are the foundations of a healthy self-esteem.

They allow us to recognize our own worth and value, independent of our acts of service to others.

Without self-love, we risk falling into patterns of self-neglect and low self-esteem.

You are valuable and deserving of love and care, just as much as anyone else.

Don’t let your acts of service to others overshadow the love you owe to yourself.

It’s about balance

At the heart of human relationships, the essence of empathy and kindness often prompts us to put others before ourselves.

While this is undoubtedly a noble trait, it becomes concerning when it’s at the expense of our own well-being.

The sacrifices we often make, from our health to our self-identity, can take a toll on us, sometimes without us even realizing it.

Indeed, giving and caring for others can bring immense joy and satisfaction.

But let’s not forget that we too are deserving of care and attention.

Understanding this is not about promoting selfishness, but about advocating for self-care and self-love.

It’s about achieving a balance where we can continue to be there for others while also being there for ourselves.

So, as you navigate through life’s complex web of relationships and responsibilities, remember to occasionally pause and reflect: Are you taking care of yourself as well as you’re taking care of others?

Because ultimately, you matter too.