Having high emotional intelligence (EQ) comes with advantages.

It allows you to understand yourself and others better, as well as navigate social situations with more finesse.

Plus, it’s a trait that can be cultivated over time, like exercising a muscle.

Where do you stand on the EQ spectrum?

People who can recognize these 9 signs in themselves have high emotional intelligence.

Let’s see if you’re one of them.

1) They are self-aware

People with high emotional intelligence possess a deep understanding of their own emotions, thoughts, and motivations.

They know themselves, warts and all, which enables them to better regulate their feelings and cope with whatever life throws their way.

In other words, they:

• Identify and label emotions accurately
• Pinpoint specific situations, people, or thoughts that trigger certain emotions
• Acknowledge their strengths and weaknesses without judgment
• Understand their core values and strive to live in alignment with them
• Regularly engage in introspection and self-reflection

Sounds like you?

Then you should pat yourself on the back.

2) They compartmentalize

Speaking of triggers, recognizing them gives you a chance to practice your compartmentalization skills.

If you’re unfamiliar with the term, compartmentalization is a psychological defense mechanism.

It involves separating conflicting thoughts, emotions, or experiences into distinct compartments or categories in order to maintain a sense of psychological balance.

Let’s say you’re in the middle of a task at work and you’re suddenly hit with a wave of grief over someone you’ve lost.

Instead of succumbing to that emotion then and there, you tuck it away into a corner of your mind and revisit it later, when you’re better equipped to deal with it.

Compartmentalization requires the ability to regulate emotions, which is why people with high emotional intelligence are generally more adept at it.

However, remember that the revisiting part is a crucial aspect of the process.

If you’re simply burying your emotions away, the strategy is anything but helpful in the long run.

All those suppressed feelings will eventually catch up with you.

3) They have empathy

Empathy is a fundamental aspect of emotional intelligence and plays an essential role in fostering deep connections with others.

It’s an ability that enables you to understand others’ perspectives and recognize what they’re going through at any given time.

In other words, being empathetic means you can mentally step into someone else’s shoes and see the world from their viewpoint.

Empathetic people are also skilled at providing emotional support and comfort to others in times of need.

Since you can grasp what the other person might be experiencing, it’s easier to find the right words to guide them through the other side.

Does this describe anyone you know?

4) They communicate effectively

Effective communication is a hallmark of high emotional intelligence.

High EQ individuals generally express themselves in a straightforward manner, using easy-to-understand language.

Empathy enables them to consider the emotions and perspectives of others, so they tailor their delivery to suit the needs of their audience.

It’s jarring to hear someone use academic language when chatting with a small child, for instance.

Yet, some people lack the emotional intelligence required to figure out that their communication style isn’t suited for a particular situation.

Not only that, but they fail to realize when they are misunderstood, which can lead to conflict and misunderstandings.

That brings me to my next point.

5) They can interpret non-verbal cues

How can you figure out if someone you are talking to understands what you’re saying?

By paying attention to their body language.

If they nod along and react with enthusiasm, you’ve hit the jackpot.

If they frown or cross their arms defensively, maybe not so much.

People with high emotional intelligence can interpret non-verbal cues with ease, from posture to tone of voice to facial expressions.

They are sensitive to personal space and know the significance of eye contact.

Moreover, they can detect slight changes in body language that suggest the listener lost interest or became offended.

All in all, their communication acumen extends beyond what is said verbally.

An eye roll is worth 1000 words.

6) They handle conflict in a healthy way

I like to fancy myself as someone who is emotionally intelligent.

I can recognize my own emotions and I have (a lot) of empathy, so technically I qualify.

Yet, whenever I must navigate conflict, I realize I still have a long way to go.

Instead of facing the situation head-on, opening up about my needs, and working with the other person to find a solution, I take the longer route.

I procrastinate having “the talk.”

I insist there isn’t a problem in the first place.

I lash out, get defensive, or default to passive-aggression.

I get so uncomfortable that my only aim becomes to get the interaction over with as quickly as possible.

People with a higher EQ than mine do things differently. The healthy way.

Whenever they deal with conflict, they:

• Remain calm and composed, avoiding impulsive reactions or escalation
• Resist shifting blame or criticizing others
• Listen to the perspectives of others without becoming defensive
• Express their feelings and concerns clearly and directly
• Adopt a solution-oriented mindset, brainstorming creative compromises

It’s something I need to work on.

How about you?

7) They are resilient

People who persevere when encountering obstacles likely have high emotional intelligence.

Resilience is a key trait associated with high EQ, and for good reason.

When someone moves forward in the face of adversity, they demonstrate great control over their emotions.

Rather than allowing them to take over and keep them down, they process them and maintain clarity of thought even under difficult circumstances.

And since they know themselves well, people with high EQ have greater confidence in their abilities.

A little bump in the road doesn’t discourage them.

They see setbacks as opportunities for growth.

8) They are receptive to new ideas

Since we’re on the topic of growth, it’s worth mentioning that self-development is something people with high emotional intelligence excel at.

They typically embrace a growth mindset.

Rather than resisting change, people with high EQ see it as a chance to learn.

They are self-assured about their ability to deal with uncertainty, so they are more flexible in their approach to life.

Furthermore, they are open to constructive criticism, using feedback to continuously improve themselves.

If you were repeatedly told that you’re a great problem-solver, this might be why.

9) They try to find the good

People with high emotional intelligence are proficient at finding the good in any given situation.

They focus on solutions rather than problems and on aspects they can influence rather than on factors beyond their control.

This allows them to have a more positive outlook on life.

Additionally, their empathy enables them to always find the good in others – even when they have to dig a little to uncover it.

People with high EQ know that things are rarely black and white and that people aren’t simply good or evil.

They make sense of the shades of grey.

Final thoughts

If you recognize the traits above in yourself, your emotional intelligence is nothing to scoff at.

And if you’re not quite there yet, there are strategies you can incorporate into your daily life to boost EQ.

Journaling, mindfulness practices, putting yourself in others’ shoes, active listening – all these take you from emotionally unaware to becoming a self-aware empathy machine in no time.

You just need to be willing to do the work.