Relationships can be tricky, even when you care deeply for someone.

Sometimes, certain habits can unknowingly damage the connection you have with your partner.

It’s not always about a lack of love or effort—often, it’s small patterns that slowly chip away at the relationship.

Things like relying too much on your partner or avoiding conflicts might seem harmless at first, but they can cause problems over time.

The good news is, once you notice these habits, you can start making changes.

In this guide, we’ll look at some common behaviors that can hurt relationships and offer simple advice on how to fix them. 

1) Overdependence on their partner

Knowing the fine line between love and dependency can be tricky, especially in relationships.

Those who can’t seem to make their relationships work usually exhibit a high degree of dependence on their partners.

This isn’t about leaning on each other during tough times – that’s perfectly healthy.

Instead, it’s about an excessive reliance that can turn into a burden.

Imagine being responsible for not just your happiness but someone else’s too, 24/7. It’s overwhelming, right?

That’s exactly how it feels to be with someone who is overly dependent.

But that doesn’t mean you should completely shun dependency. 

Have you ever heard of the dependency paradox?

Research actually shows that accepting dependency in relationships promotes independence. 

Interesting, right?

2) Avoiding conflict

This might sound strange, but avoiding conflict can actually be a relationship killer.

I know this from personal experience.

In one of my past relationships, I thought that by dodging arguments and sweeping disagreements under the rug, I was keeping the peace.

I couldn’t have been more wrong.

What I didn’t realize back then was that avoiding conflict didn’t mean the problem had disappeared.

It simply meant we were suppressing our feelings and letting resentment build up.

This behavior eventually led to an explosion of unresolved issues that we couldn’t deal with, marking the end of our relationship.

Avoiding conflict in relationships, I learned the hard way, does not resolve it.

It merely postpones it, allowing it to grow into a bigger issue than it initially was.

Healthy relationships require open and honest communication. It’s not about winning or losing an argument – it’s about understanding your partner’s point of view and finding a middle ground.

It’s okay to disagree sometimes.

The key is to communicate effectively and resolve conflicts in a constructive manner.

3) Poor communication skills

Communication is the lifeblood of any relationship.

When it’s absent, misunderstandings and misinterpretations can occur, leading to unnecessary conflicts and hurt feelings.

In fact, a study published in the Journal of Marriage and Family found that lack of communication was one of the top predictors of divorce among couples.

The researchers concluded that couples who were unable to effectively communicate their feelings and needs were more likely to be unhappy and ultimately separate.

It’s not just about talking, but also about listening.

Active listening involves giving your full attention to your partner, understanding their viewpoint, and responding appropriately.

It’s an essential skill to cultivate for a healthy relationship.

Building good communication habits can take time, but it’s worth every effort.

Remember, it’s not just about getting your point across; it’s also about understanding your partner’s perspective and finding common ground.

4) Lack of trust

Trust is the foundation of any strong relationship. When it’s missing, everything else begins to crumble.

People who often struggle to maintain lasting relationships frequently exhibit a lack of trust in their partners.

This could manifest in various ways – constant suspicion, jealousy, or the need to control their partner’s actions.

Trust isn’t just about faithfulness.

It’s about believing your partner when they tell you something, trusting them to make decisions, and knowing they have your best interest at heart.

Without trust, you’re building your relationship on shaky ground.

It’s important to work on building trust with your partner for a lasting relationship.

Constant suspicion and control can only lead to resentment and, ultimately, a breakup.

5) Not learning from past mistakes

We all make mistakes in relationships. It’s a part of being human.

The key, however, is to learn from them and grow.

Those who can’t seem to maintain lasting relationships often repeat the same mistakes over and over again.

Whether it’s taking their partner for granted, not expressing their feelings openly, or failing to compromise, these patterns keep repeating, leading to the same outcome – a breakup.

Learning from past mistakes is crucial for personal growth and for the health of your relationship.

It’s essential to identify what went wrong in the past, understand why it happened, and take steps to prevent it from happening again.

It’s not the mistake that defines you, but how you learn and grow from it.

Allowing yourself to learn from your past can pave the way for healthier, more successful relationships in the future.

6) Neglecting emotional intimacy

There’s a certain depth that emotional intimacy brings to a relationship.

It’s not just about the physical connection but about truly understanding and connecting with your partner on an emotional level.

People who struggle with keeping relationships often neglect this crucial aspect.

They fail to open up, and share their deepest fears, aspirations, or even simple thoughts about their day.

In doing so, they put up walls that keep their partners at a distance.

Emotional intimacy creates a safe space where both partners feel valued, heard, and loved for who they are.

It’s a silent conversation of understanding and acceptance that binds two people together, making them feel like they belong to each other.

Take time to foster emotional intimacy in your relationship. Share your thoughts, listen to theirs, and let them know they matter.

It’s these heartfelt moments of connection that can make a relationship last in the long run.

7) Failing to give personal space

While togetherness is an essential part of a relationship, so is personal space.

Every individual needs some time to themselves, to pursue their interests, to reflect, or simply to relax.

I remember a time when I was on the other side of this equation.

My partner and I were spending every waking moment together, and it was starting to feel suffocating.

There was no room for individual growth, no space for missing each other. It felt like we were losing our identities.

This constant togetherness eventually led to frustration and bitterness, driving us apart.

It was only later that I understood the importance of personal space in a relationship.

Giving your partner space doesn’t mean you’re drifting apart.

It means you’re giving them room to grow as an individual while also growing as a couple.

It’s about finding the right balance between ‘me’ time and ‘we’ time.

And trust me, it can make all the difference in making a relationship last.

8) Unrealistic expectations

Expectations are a part of every relationship.

However, when these expectations become unrealistic, they can lead to disappointment and resentment.

People who often struggle in their relationships tend to set unrealistic expectations for their partners.

They expect perfection and end up disappointed when their partners inevitably fall short.

This can set the relationship up for constant conflict and dissatisfaction.

It’s important to understand that no one is perfect, and everyone has their strengths and weaknesses.

Setting realistic expectations involves understanding your partner’s capabilities and accepting them for who they are, flaws and all.

A relationship is about two imperfect individuals coming together to create a beautiful bond.

Being patient, understanding, and accepting of your partner’s imperfections can help you build a stronger, lasting relationship.

9) Forgetting to nurture the relationship

Just like a plant needs water and sunlight to grow, a relationship needs constant nurturing to thrive.

Those who frequently face relationship breakdowns often forget this key aspect.

They stop putting in the effort that was there in the beginning – the sweet gestures, the meaningful conversations, the quality time spent together.

Never stop trying to win over your partner, showing them love, or expressing your appreciation for them.

Nurturing your relationship keeps the spark alive and helps build a strong, lasting bond.

It’s all about growth together

In any relationship, small actions can have a big impact. It’s important to notice and fix habits that might harm your connection with your partner.

Building a strong relationship isn’t about being perfect; it’s about growing together, learning from mistakes, and constantly caring for each other.

Simple things like giving each other space, talking openly, and having realistic expectations can make a huge difference.

A good relationship is one where both people help each other grow and work together to solve problems.

By focusing on these things, you can build a relationship based on respect, trust, and love.