People who become set in their ways as they get older usually display these 10 behaviors (without realizing it)

Eliza Hartley by Eliza Hartley | October 28, 2024, 6:54 pm

Change is the only constant in life, yet as we age, we often find ourselves resisting it. We become set in our ways, repeating certain behaviors without even realizing it.

As we grow older, we find comfort in familiarity and routine. These patterns of behavior serve as reassuring anchors in the sea of life’s uncertainties. However, these behaviors can also limit our growth and potential.

This article will shed light on the 10 behaviors that people often display as they become set in their ways.

If these behaviors sound familiar, it might be time to take a step back, reflect, and make a conscious effort to keep your mind open to new ideas and experiences.

1) Resistance to new technology

We live in a rapidly evolving digital world, and it can feel overwhelming trying to keep up with the latest gadgets, apps and devices.

However, a common behavior that people often display as they age is a resistance to technology.

As we grow older, it can be tempting to stick with what we know and avoid new technological advances. This behavior is often unconscious – it’s not that we’re deliberately rejecting technology, but rather that we gravitate towards the familiar and comfortable.

If you find yourself stubbornly sticking to old technologies or methods and refusing to adapt to new ones, this could signal that you’re becoming set in your ways.

It’s not about becoming a tech whiz overnight or embracing every new gadget that hits the market. Rather, it’s about acknowledging that technology can enhance our lives in many ways and being open to learning about it.

Refusing to engage with new technologies can limit your experiences and make you feel disconnected from the world around you. 

So if you find yourself feeling overwhelmed by the thought of learning how to use a new piece of technology, remember this – it’s okay to take small steps.

Start with one app or gadget, and gradually expand your digital horizons at your own pace.

2) Sticking to the same routine

Routines can be a great source of comfort and stability. They help us manage our time effectively and can reduce stress.

However, an overreliance on routine can signal an unwillingness to deviate from the norm or explore the unknown.

If you find yourself rigidly adhering to your daily routine to the point where any deviation throws you off balance, it might be a sign that you’re becoming set in your ways.

It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking that routines are always beneficial.

While a certain level of structure is good, too much can inhibit spontaneity and make life feel monotonous. It’s worth examining whether your love for routine is actually a resistance to stepping out of your comfort zone. If it is, try breaking your routine every now and then to keep things fresh and exciting.

3) Avoiding new experiences

As we age, our comfort zones often become more rigid. We tend to stick to what we know, avoiding new experiences and opportunities. This could be as simple as not trying a new type of cuisine or as significant as turning down a chance to travel to a new place.

In a study conducted by the University of Texas, researchers found that individuals who regularly engaged in novel and mentally challenging experiences showed less cognitive decline compared to those who stuck to familiar activities.

While it can feel comfortable to stay within our known parameters, stepping out of our comfort zones can lead to personal growth and improved cognitive health. It’s never too late to try something new and enrich life with unique experiences.

4) Resistance to change

Change can be challenging for anyone, no matter their age. We all naturally get comfortable with what we know and where we are in life.

But as we grow older, we often develop an increased resistance to change. This might manifest as a reluctance to move houses, change jobs, or even switch brands at the grocery store.

If you find yourself immediately dismissing new ideas or experiences without giving them their due consideration, it could be a sign that you’re becoming set in your ways.

This resistance isn’t just about stubbornness. It’s often tied to a desire for stability and predictability. As we age, we’ve worked hard to create a life that feels comfortable and secure, and any change threatens that equilibrium. 

But the world around us is constantly changing, and adaptability is key to staying engaged and active in our lives.

While it’s okay to value stability, it’s equally important to remain open to changes that could improve our lives or broaden our perspectives.

Habitual resistance to change can limit your growth and can make your life feel stagnant. It’s worth reflecting on whether this is a pattern in your behavior, and if so, making a conscious effort to challenge it.

5) Holding onto possessions

As we age, we sometimes become attached to our possessions, even those we no longer use or need. It’s as if the things we own become an extension of our identity and a testament to our life’s journey.

There’s comfort in the familiar. That old armchair might be worn out, but it’s also where you used to read bedtime stories to your children. Those dusty vinyl records might not have been played in years, but they remind you of your youthful days.

The challenge is that clinging to possessions can lead to clutter and disorganization, making our living spaces less functional and enjoyable. It can also be mentally draining.

It’s important to remember that while objects can hold sentimental value, they’re not the only representation of our memories or identities. Letting go of unnecessary possessions can be liberating, making room for new experiences and memories.

6) Reluctance to learn

Lifelong learning is a concept that gets plenty of airplay, and for good reason.

Continually learning and expanding our knowledge can contribute to our personal growth and keep our minds sharp. However, a common trait among those who are set in their ways is a reluctance to learn new things.

If you find yourself avoiding learning opportunities or feeling annoyed by the prospect of having to learn something new, this could be a sign that you’re becoming rigid in your ways. It’s not about earning degrees or mastering complex subjects.

Instead, it’s about embracing the joy of learning for its own sake. Whether it’s a new language, a cooking technique, or understanding how your smartphone works, there’s a certain satisfaction that comes from learning something new.

So next time an opportunity to learn presents itself, why not embrace it? It might just ignite a passion you never knew you had.

7) Reluctance to forge new relationships

It’s often assumed that as we get older, our circle of friends should be well established. However, this belief can sometimes lead us to close off opportunities for forging new relationships.

If you find yourself declining invitations to social gatherings or avoiding situations where you might meet new people, it could be a sign that you’re becoming set in your ways. It’s not about replacing old friends, but rather about enriching your life with diverse relationships.

Contrary to common belief, forming new friendships isn’t just for the young. New relationships can bring fresh perspectives, experiences and joy into our lives at any age.

So next time, instead of declining that invitation or avoiding that gathering, why not take a chance? You never know who you might meet.

8) Becoming overly cautious

The sting of a mistake or a failed attempt can be hard to swallow. As we get older, it’s natural to become more cautious.

The fear of making mistakes can become so intense that it stops us from trying new things altogether. This caution can sometimes hold us back from taking risks that could lead to growth and fulfillment.

If you find yourself avoiding new experiences or challenges because you’re afraid of messing up, this could be a sign that you’re becoming set in your ways. It’s a harsh truth, but failure is a part of life. We all make mistakes, and that’s okay.

The real tragedy lies not in making mistakes, but in letting the fear of failure hold us back from reaching our full potential, trying something new or following our dreams.

Whether it’s starting a new hobby, learning a new skill, or even starting a new relationship, it’s important to remember that taking calculated risks can lead to new opportunities and experiences. 

So the next time you’re faced with a new opportunity or challenge, don’t let the fear of making mistakes stop you. Even if things don’t work out as planned, there’s always a lesson to be learned in the process.

9) Consistent complaint about modern trends

It’s no secret that trends come and go.

From fashion and music to language and social norms, change is a constant part of our world. However, consistently complaining about modern trends can be a sign of becoming set in one’s ways.

If you find yourself frequently lamenting about “the good old days” or criticizing new trends without appreciating the creativity or innovation behind them, you might be stuck in your ways.

Interestingly, studies have shown that our brains are wired to prefer familiar things. This is known as the “mere-exposure effect“. It explains why we often prefer songs we’ve heard before and why we stick to tried-and-true recipes.

But this natural preference for familiarity can lead us to dismiss new trends outright, instead of giving them a fair chance.

Remember, every trend that we fondly remember as part of “the good old days” was once a new idea that was met with resistance. Embracing change and appreciating innovation is a crucial part of staying open-minded and adaptable.

10) Isolation

As we age, we can sometimes lose sight of the importance of connection. We may find ourselves spending more time alone, retreating from social events, or neglecting our relationships.

Connection – to our family, friends, community, even to ourselves – is vital for our well-being at any age. It’s through these connections that we find support love, and a sense of belonging.

But often, we don’t realize how isolated we’ve become until it affects our mental or physical health.

Remember, it’s never too late to reach out, to make a phone call, send a letter, or even join a club or group. Because no matter how old we get, we all need to feel connected.

Understanding the psychology behind becoming set in one’s ways

As we’ve explored, there are several behaviors that can indicate a person is becoming set in their ways. But it’s also worth delving a bit deeper into why this happens. Understanding the psychology behind this phenomenon can provide valuable insights into our own behaviors and help us make more conscious decisions about how we choose to live our lives as we age.

One common reason why people become set in their ways is the desire for predictability and control. As we grow older, our world can feel increasingly uncertain. Maintaining familiar routines and resisting change can create a sense of stability and control amidst this uncertainty. However, while this can provide temporary comfort, it can also lead to stagnation and a closed mindset if taken to an extreme.

Another factor is cognitive rigidity. As we age, our cognitive flexibility – the ability to adapt to new situations and think about things in new ways – can decrease. This can lead to a preference for the familiar and a resistance to new experiences. However, many studies have shown that keeping an active mind through continual learning and mental stimulation can help maintain cognitive flexibility.

Further, fear plays a significant role. Fear of the unknown, fear of failure, fear of judgment – these fears can hold us back from embracing new experiences and relationships. It’s important to remember that everyone experiences these fears to some degree, and it’s okay to feel scared. But it’s also important not to let these fears dictate our lives.

Finally, societal expectations can contribute to becoming set in one’s ways. Society often paints a picture of what older age should look like – comfortable, predictable, safe. But these stereotypes don’t have to define your life. Aging doesn’t mean you have to stop exploring, learning or challenging yourself.

In understanding these factors, it’s important not to judge or criticize yourself for exhibiting some of the behaviors we’ve discussed. Instead, use this understanding as a tool for self-reflection and growth. Remember, it’s never too late to change, learn and grow. The key is to stay curious, remain open to new experiences, and keep challenging yourself. Because in the end, life is about growth and adaptation – at any age.