Divorce can be rough, but it doesn’t automatically make you a bad parent. In fact, some people become even better parents post-divorce.

The key? It’s all about behavior.

There are certain behaviors that can help you not just survive, but thrive as a single parent post-divorce. These behaviors allow you to better connect with your kids, handle stress, and navigate this new chapter in your life.

In this article, we’ll highlight the 7 specific behaviors typically displayed by those who become better parents after divorce. These behaviors aren’t hard to adopt, but they can make a world of difference for both you and your kiddos.

So let’s dive in, shall we?

1) They prioritize communication

Communication is key in any relationship, but it’s especially crucial when navigating parenthood after divorce.

Divorced parents who ace their parenting game are often those who prioritize open and honest communication with their kids. They make sure to discuss the changes happening, reassure their children, and keep them in the loop.

But it’s not just about talking, it’s about listening too. These parents are active listeners, giving their full attention when their kids speak up about their feelings or concerns.

This not only helps the children feel valued and heard, but also aids in addressing any potential issues early on.

So if you’re aiming to be a better parent post-divorce, remember, communication is your best friend. And the good news? It’s a skill that can be learned and honed with practice.

2) They make self-care a priority

I know from personal experience how easy it is to get lost in the chaos of divorce and let self-care slide. I used to think it was selfish to take time for myself when my kids were going through so much. But I quickly realized that I couldn’t pour from an empty cup.

The best version of me is a rested, nurtured, and well-balanced one. And that’s the version my kids need the most, especially during tough times.

So, I started prioritizing self-care. I began with small changes like making sure I ate well, got enough sleep, and took time each day to do something I enjoyed, even if it was just reading a chapter of a book or taking a short walk.

And you know what? It made a huge difference – not just in my own mental and physical health, but in my parenting too.

The better I felt, the better parent I became. I was more patient, more understanding, and more present with my kids.

So, if you’re navigating through post-divorce parenthood, remember to take care of yourself too. Because a happier you means happier kids.

3) They maintain consistency

Consistency is one of the most powerful tools in a parent’s arsenal. Children thrive on routine and predictability. It gives them a sense of security and helps them understand what is expected of them.

In fact, research has shown that consistency in parenting can lead to better academic performance, fewer behavior problems, and even improved mental health in children.

Divorced parents who excel at their role often ensure routines and rules remain consistent between the two households. They work together to create and maintain similar schedules, rules, and discipline methods.

This might mean having the same bedtime routine, the same rules about screen time, or even the same consequences for broken rules.

While it might require extra effort and collaboration with your ex-spouse, keeping things consistent can help your child adjust to the changes more smoothly and provide them with a much needed sense of stability.

4) They don’t use their kids as messengers

It can be tempting to use your kids as a go-between, especially when communication with your ex-spouse is strained. But the better parents make it a point to avoid this pitfall.

They understand that loading their children with messages to pass on can put them in a tough spot and add unnecessary stress. It’s not the child’s job to handle adult matters.

Instead, they find healthier ways of communication with their ex-spouse. This could be through emails, texts, phone calls or even using co-parenting apps designed to facilitate communication and collaboration between divorced parents.

By keeping the children out of the communication loop with their ex-spouse, they shield them from possible conflicts and help maintain their innocence and peace of mind.

5) They encourage a healthy relationship with the other parent

Being honest, it wasn’t easy in the beginning. There were times when I was hurt and angry, and it would have been easy to let those feelings color my kid’s relationship with their other parent.

But I knew that wasn’t fair to them.

Children need and deserve to have positive relationships with both parents. So, regardless of my feelings about my ex-spouse, I encouraged their relationship. I made sure they knew it was okay to love and spend time with their other parent.

I reassured them that our divorce wasn’t their fault and that both of us still loved them deeply. I never badmouthed my ex-spouse in front of them, and I always supported their time together.

Over time, I saw the positive impact this approach had on my kids. It allowed them to adjust better to our new family dynamics and helped them maintain strong, loving relationships with both of us.

6) They refrain from making major changes immediately

Divorce is a significant change in itself and can be quite unsettling for children. That’s why successful single parents understand the importance of maintaining as much stability as possible during this transition.

They avoid making other major changes immediately after the divorce. This could mean not moving to a new city right away, keeping kids in the same school, or maintaining familiar routines and traditions.

This approach helps children feel more secure and grounded amidst the upheaval. It gives them time to adjust to the new family structure without being overwhelmed by too many changes at once.

Gradually, as things settle down and everyone starts to adjust, it may become appropriate to introduce other changes. But initially, keeping things as steady as possible can help smooth the transition for your kids.

7) They always put their kids first

At the end of the day, the most crucial behavior displayed by better parents after divorce is this: they always put their children’s needs and wellbeing first.

Whether it’s making decisions about custody arrangements, navigating new relationships, or dealing with conflicts with the ex-spouse, they always consider what’s best for their children.

They understand that despite the divorce, they are still parents first. And their primary responsibility is to provide a loving, stable, and nurturing environment for their children.

This unwavering commitment to their children’s happiness and wellbeing is what truly sets them apart and helps them navigate the challenges of post-divorce parenting with grace and success.