People who become a better version of themselves after heartbreak usually adopt these 9 habits

Ava Sinclair by Ava Sinclair | June 11, 2024, 10:28 am

Heartbreak: the universal crash course in self-discovery. 

While the aftermath can feel like navigating a minefield of emotions, many emerge stronger, wiser, and surprisingly, better versions of themselves. How? Through habits that act as scaffolding during the rebuild. 

From embracing solitude to prioritizing self-care, those who transform pain into growth tend to share common practices. 

Here are nine habits often adopted by those who emerge from heartbreak shining brighter than before.

1) Embrace the pain

Heartbreak is painful, there’s no two ways about it. But those who turn heartbreak into a path towards a better version of themselves don’t shy away from this pain.

Instead, they embrace it.

As counterintuitive as it may seem, facing the pain head-on can lead to significant personal growth. It forces you to confront your feelings, understand what went wrong, and figure out how you can avoid repeating the same mistakes.

Consider this: the pain of heartbreak is like a wake-up call. It’s your heart telling you that something needs to change. Embracing this pain allows you to listen to that call and respond to it.

2) Prioritize self-care

I can’t stress enough how crucial self-care is after a breakup, especially when aiming to become a better version of yourself.

In my own experience, after my first major heartbreak, I neglected my own needs. I stopped eating properly, barely slept, and let my physical health decline. It was a dark time, and trust me, it didn’t help me grow or recover.

However, when my next heartbreak came around (yes, unfortunately, there was another one), I had learned from my previous mistakes. I made a conscious effort to prioritize self-care. I started eating nutritious meals, going to the gym regularly, and ensuring I got enough sleep.

This small shift in focus had a major impact. Not only did it help me recover faster from the heartbreak, but it also led to massive improvements in my overall wellbeing and self-confidence.

3) Practice mindfulness

Mindfulness means being fully present in the moment and accepting thoughts and feelings without judgment. It’s a valuable practice for coping with heartbreak.

Studies from Harvard Medical School reveal that mindfulness can reshape our brains, especially strengthening the prefrontal cortex, which governs emotional regulation and decision-making.

During heartbreak, managing emotions and making clear decisions are vital. Mindfulness helps rewire your brain to handle breakup turmoil more effectively.

So, whether it’s through meditation, yoga, or simply focusing on your breath for a few minutes each day, try to incorporate mindfulness into your daily routine. 

4) Seek support

After heartbreak, it’s tempting to pull a disappearing act and hibernate from the world. But here’s the thing: no one can do it all alone. Those who come back from heartbreak even stronger often get the support they need.

Whether it’s having heart-to-hearts with your besties, pouring your heart out to family, talking it through with a therapist, or finding solace in a support group, reaching out can be a game-changer.

It’s not about being weak—it’s about being real. Admitting you’re hurting and reaching out? That’s brave stuff. And guess what? It’s the first step towards healing and becoming an even better version of yourself.

5) Cultivate gratitude

Gratitude can be a powerful tool in overcoming heartbreak and growing stronger from it. It’s about shifting your focus from what you’ve lost to what you still have and appreciating the good in your life.

Even in the midst of heartbreak, there are likely aspects of your life that you’re grateful for. Perhaps it’s your health, your friends, your job, or simply the fact that you’re alive and able to experience the world around you.

By consciously focusing on these positives, you can help to lift your mood and shift your perspective. It allows you to see beyond the pain of the present moment and recognize that there is still plenty of good in your life.

Cultivating a habit of gratitude isn’t always easy, especially when you’re going through a hard time. But with practice, it can become a powerful force for positivity and resilience in your life.

6) Forgive and let go

Forgiveness? Yeah, it’s probably the last thing you want to think about when your heart’s in pieces. But here’s the kicker: those who bounce back from heartbreak usually get that forgiveness thing.

Now, it’s no walk in the park. Forgiveness can feel like trying to lift a boulder when you’re already carrying a ton of emotional baggage. But here’s the deal: holding onto grudges only weighs you down.

Forgiving doesn’t mean you’re okay with what went down or that you’re gonna forget it. It’s about ditching the bitterness that’s keeping you stuck.

When you forgive, you’re saying, “I’m done letting this mess control me.” It’s like opening a door to healing and growth, giving yourself permission to move on and level up.

7) Set new goals

Man, when my relationship hit the skids, I was lost at sea. All those plans we had? Poof, gone in a flash. I felt like I was drifting without a compass.

But you know what? I decided to be the captain of my own ship. I started charting a new course, setting goals left and right—personal, professional, you name it. Trips I wanted to take, skills I wanted to master, career milestones I aimed to smash.

Having these new targets lit a fire under me. Instead of moping about what I’d lost, I was pumped about what I could achieve. It helped me redefine myself outside of the relationship, and dig deep into who I really was, and what I wanted out of life.

Trust me, setting new goals can be a powerful way to redirect your energy after heartbreak. It gives you a sense of purpose and direction, helping you move forward towards becoming a better version of yourself.

8) Stay open to love

After a breakup, it’s easy to slam the door on love and toss the key. Been there, done that. But here’s the kicker: those who come out stronger know that love’s worth the risk.

Now, staying open doesn’t mean you’re diving headfirst into the dating pool. It’s more about realizing that just ’cause one relationship went south, it doesn’t mean they all will. Each one’s a whole new ball game.

Here’s a reminder: staying open means loving yourself first and foremost. Cheesy as it sounds, it’s true. You can’t pour from an empty cup. Self-love is the secret sauce for healing and leveling up after heartbreak.

9) Use heartbreak as a catalyst for change

Do you know what separates those who come out stronger from heartbreak? They don’t let it drag them down—they use it as a launchpad for change.

Instead of seeing heartbreak as the end of the world, they see it as a chance to hit the reset button. It’s like flipping the script from victim to victor.

Heartbreak kicks your butt into gear. Suddenly, you’re questioning everything, reevaluating your life choices, and plotting a new course.

Here’s the thing: it’s not the heartbreak itself that defines you—it’s what you do with it. When you use it to fuel positive change, you’re turning your pain into power, your mess into a masterpiece.

Heartbreak: A catalyst for transformation

Heartbreak is like getting tossed into a stormy sea, isn’t it? 

But hey, amidst all that chaos, there’s something beautiful waiting to bloom, just like the lotus rising from muddy waters. It’s wild how heartbreak can push us to dig deep and grow in ways we never imagined.

Sure, it’s tough going through it all—soul-searching, facing our demons and rebuilding bit by bit. But you know what? The storm eventually clears. And when it does, you’ll find yourself standing stronger, wiser, and more resilient than ever.

So hang in there, buddy. You’ve got this.