We all know that person. The one who seems to only ever talk about themselves, paying little heed to the interests or feelings of others. These self-absorbed individuals often exhibit certain behaviors that mark them out.

The truth is, it’s not always easy to recognize these behaviors, especially when we’re interacting with people we care about. But being able to spot these signs can make a world of difference in understanding the dynamics of your relationships.

In this article, we will explore eight common behaviors typically displayed by those who are self-absorbed and show little interest in others. By the end of it, you’ll be well-equipped to identify and navigate such situations with greater ease and insight.

Let’s dive into it.

1) Constantly talking about themselves

We all love a good chat, don’t we? But here’s the thing: Conversation is a two-way street. It’s about give and take, listening and responding.

Enter the self-absorbed individual.

These people have a knack for turning every conversation into a monologue about themselves. Be it their achievements, their problems, or their life story – they always find a way to steer the conversation back to them.

This self-centered behavior is often the first red flag that someone may be more focused on themselves than on those around them. It’s as if they’re living in their own little world where they’re the only one who matters.

So, next time you’re in a conversation with someone who can’t seem to stop talking about themselves, take note. It might be more than just a harmless idiosyncrasy.

2) Lack of empathy

I remember when I was going through a really tough time in my life. I’d just lost my job, and I was struggling to make ends meet.

One evening, I was having a catch-up with a friend, let’s call her Lisa. I’d known Lisa for years, and I thought she would be a good person to talk to about my situation.

As I started talking about my troubles, instead of offering comfort or support, Lisa quickly steered the conversation towards her recent vacation. She began narrating how her vacation was not up to her expectations, completely ignoring the seriousness of my situation.

That was the moment it hit me. Lisa rarely showed genuine empathy towards others’ issues. Her focus was primarily on herself, and she seemed oblivious to the feelings or problems of those around her.

This lack of empathy is another key behavior often displayed by self-absorbed individuals. They have difficulty stepping outside of their own experiences and emotions to understand or share the feelings of others. It’s not that they’re necessarily cruel or heartless; it’s just that their world revolves primarily around them.

3) Difficulty in accepting criticism

Self-absorbed individuals often struggle with receiving criticism. If you’ve ever tried to offer constructive feedback to someone who gets defensive or refuses to acknowledge their faults, you might be dealing with a self-absorbed person.

Interestingly, a study found that people who exhibit grandiose narcissism, which is often linked to self-absorption, are less likely to accept criticism and more likely to lash out at those who criticize them.

This reaction might stem from their inflated self-image. In their eyes, they’re doing everything right and are above reproach. Any critique is seen as a personal attack rather than an opportunity for growth.

So, if you notice someone consistently dodging or getting overly defensive when faced with criticism, it could signal self-absorbed tendencies.

4) Rarely showing genuine interest in others

This one seems obvious, but it’s worth mentioning. Self-absorbed people rarely show genuine interest in others. It’s not just about dominating conversations; it’s also about ignoring or dismissing others’ feelings, opinions, and experiences.

For instance, if you’re telling a story and the person you’re speaking to seems disinterested, constantly interrupts, or changes the subject back to themselves, it might indicate a lack of interest in you and your experiences.

Remember, a healthy conversation involves active listening and mutual respect. If someone pays little attention to what you say or how you feel, it might be because their focus is primarily on themselves. This disregard for others is a classic sign of self-absorption.

5) Lack of reciprocity in relationships

Relationships are about balance. They thrive on mutual respect, understanding, and reciprocity. But when one person is too wrapped up in their own world, this balance can be tipped.

Self-absorbed individuals often struggle with the concept of reciprocity in relationships. In their quest to satiate their own needs and desires, they tend to overlook the needs and feelings of others. This can lead to one-sided relationships where the other person feels unheard, unappreciated, and often drained.

It’s disheartening, isn’t it? To give so much of yourself to someone who seems indifferent to your needs. It’s like shouting into a void, hoping for an echo that never comes.

So, if you find yourself constantly giving and rarely receiving in a relationship, it might be time to take a step back and assess whether the other person is truly invested in your well-being or just their own.

6) Always needing to be the center of attention

I recall a time when I had to prepare a presentation for a crucial work meeting. I worked tirelessly, stayed up late, refined my slides, and rehearsed my speech until it was almost flawless.

Come the big day, I was a bundle of nerves, but also excited to share my hard work. However, just as I was about to start my presentation, a colleague – let’s call him Mark – burst into the room late. He made a loud, dramatic entrance that instantly drew all attention away from me and onto him.

Throughout my presentation, Mark continued to interrupt with jokes and irrelevant comments. He seemed determined to keep the spotlight on himself at all times, even at the expense of my hard work and professionalism.

This behavior was frustrating and deeply undermining. It was clear Mark had a need to be the center of attention – another common trait in self-absorbed individuals. They thrive on being in the spotlight and will often go out of their way to ensure they remain there, regardless of how it impacts others.

7) Disregard for boundaries

Respect for personal boundaries is critical in any healthy relationship. But self-absorbed people often struggle with this concept. They tend to disregard other people’s boundaries in their quest to fulfill their own needs and desires.

This could manifest in various ways, such as consistently turning up late for appointments, invading personal space, or persistently pushing others to do things they’re uncomfortable with.

The disregard for boundaries stems from their belief that their needs and wants take precedence over others’. And while it might not always be intentional, it can cause significant distress and discomfort to those on the receiving end.

8) Lack of self-awareness

Perhaps the most significant trait of self-absorbed individuals is a profound lack of self-awareness. They often fail to recognize how their behavior impacts others, and even when confronted, they struggle to understand or accept it.

This lack of self-awareness can make it challenging to address their behavior or make them realize the need for change. It’s like trying to explain color to someone who has only ever seen in black and white.

Understanding this can be crucial when dealing with self-absorbed individuals. Rather than expecting them to suddenly gain insight into their behavior, it may be more effective to focus on managing your own responses and maintaining your boundaries. Remember, you can’t control others’ actions, but you can control how you respond to them.